7 ms·

> Last time I saw these children, they were >10 years old and they had no clue how to use a fork and a knife. Shoutout to the adults like myself that grew up l

> Last time I saw these children, they were >10 years old and they had no clue how to use a fork and a knife. Shoutout to the adults like myself that grew up like this. On the one hand, you develop outside the box thinking, because you had to learn everything via trial-by-eroror - no one taught you how to think inside the box. On the other hand, it's tough to trust or ask anyone for help.

lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 2y ago
> it's tough to trust or ask anyone for help I recommend that you read things that Pete Walker has written, if you haven’t already.
robbomacrae 2y ago
You've just given the perfect example of Attachment Theory [0]. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory
- lazystar 2y ago
  what the hell... how so?
  - robbomacrae 2y ago
    Well I'm no champion of this theory.. bit skeptical TBH having been shown during some parenting coaching BUT the idea is kids who have a loving, trusting and attentive relationship with their primary care giver will be more likely to trust and seek help from others later in life and vice versa.
    - lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 2y ago
      > a loving, trusting and attentive relationship with their primary care giver If you grew up without this, you would not be able to avoid noticing how seemingly effortlessly the people around you have adjusted to adulthood when it can sometimes be a struggle to get over your fear of interacting with other people when you go to the grocery store. Not saying your skepticism is invalid but I would suggest to consider that perhaps the above is a privilege that not all enjoy and what injurious effects its absence may have. You may wonder about those close to you who seem to have trust issues: did/do they have a good relationship with their childhood care givers?
    - flyinghamster 2y ago
      Speaking only for myself, I had a loving, trusting relationship with my parents. It was my peers who taught me not to trust (edit: also school administrators).

lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 2y ago

> it's tough to trust or ask anyone for help I recommend that you read things that Pete Walker has written, if you haven’t already.

robbomacrae 2y ago

You've just given the perfect example of Attachment Theory [0]. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory

lazystar 2y ago
what the hell... how so?
- robbomacrae 2y ago
  Well I'm no champion of this theory.. bit skeptical TBH having been shown during some parenting coaching BUT the idea is kids who have a loving, trusting and attentive relationship with their primary care giver will be more likely to trust and seek help from others later in life and vice versa.
  - lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 2y ago
    > a loving, trusting and attentive relationship with their primary care giver If you grew up without this, you would not be able to avoid noticing how seemingly effortlessly the people around you have adjusted to adulthood when it can sometimes be a struggle to get over your fear of interacting with other people when you go to the grocery store. Not saying your skepticism is invalid but I would suggest to consider that perhaps the above is a privilege that not all enjoy and what injurious effects its absence may have. You may wonder about those close to you who seem to have trust issues: did/do they have a good relationship with their childhood care givers?
  - flyinghamster 2y ago
    Speaking only for myself, I had a loving, trusting relationship with my parents. It was my peers who taught me not to trust (edit: also school administrators).