4 ms·

Nah. It's well-written but I disagree with pretty much all of it. Having a powerful tool to hand has made me more confident, happier, healthier, and yes, sexier

by lmm 2y ago

Nah. It's well-written but I disagree with pretty much all of it. Having a powerful tool to hand has made me more confident, happier, healthier, and yes, sexier. My relationships are better than ever (well, they took a hit when I moved internationally - but that would've been much worse without a phone). I don't want to go back to having to go downtown to look up a fact at the library, or eating at terrible restaurants, or having to endure hours of tedium and pretend to like it because there was no alternative.

rubslopes 2y ago
As an introvert, I can’t imagine how awful it would be if I were still receiving focus-breaking phone calls all day like in the ’90s.
yamazakiwi 2y ago
Yeah I think a lot of people are just old in this thread and are nodding along because that's how it used to be. They're talking for everyone as if they are the arbiters of what is sexy for everyone when it's clearly taking popular viewpoints from a specific time, place, and type of person. All of their examples of Phones used to be sexy are stupid. These people are just nostalgic. The fact that they mention NEETs using Pornography and Video Games as supplements for relationship and achievement is a signal. Some people might do that but do you think most of these people would have done other decidedly sexy things had these things not existed? What is your argument? Even if it was true should we then force these men, who don't get attention from women, to do nothing but chase women and fail because it's "romantic", the world does not revolve around you. This woman sounds like those people who denigrate video games and pornography then watch 30 hours of trashy reality television a week and don't see the irony of their own behavior. We get it, your boyfriend won't pay attention to you because your relationship was poor in the first place and now you have an issue with others enjoying themselves. Also, nothing is stopping you from being spontaneous, nothing is forcing you to look up the menu before you go to a restaurant. That is your active decision that you're crying about as if it's what everyone is forced to do. I have no issue being spontaneous and actively choose to not look stuff up all the time. People like this are the same type of people to try and police others behavior but never discover their own flaws or ignore double standards because it benefits them, and yet decry others are living terribly.
- snozolli 2y ago
  Some people might do that but do you think most of these people would have done other decidedly sexy things had these things not existed? Yes. Look at surveys of sexual activity. Not everyone would be more sexually successful, but the average would be different. Here's an example: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7293001/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7293001/ In this survey study of US adults from 2000 to 2018, sexual inactivity increased among men aged 18 to 24 years and 25 to 34 years and women aged 25 to 34 years during the study period, with the increase among men mainly occurring among unmarried individuals. Men with lower income and with part-time or no employment were more likely to be sexually inactive, as were men and women who were students.
  - yamazakiwi 2y ago
    While these trends exist, they don't directly correlate with the invention of the smart phone or the behaviors the poster is stating are unsexy. It has more to do with social education, reduction of religion, and many other factors not discussed in their post.
    - snozolli 2y ago
      Those were two confident assertions with zero supporting evidence. Smartphone use is correlated with depression: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10587281/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10587281/ Social media use is correlated with depression in young adults: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4853817/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4853817/ These are just two results from a 30 second Google search. There is a ton of information out there that directly correlates both social media and immediate, ubiquitous access to it (i.e. smartphones) with negative social outcomes, including suicide rates.
      - lmm 2y ago
        Honestly "smartphone bad" is such a popular thing to publish and claim, and so directly contradictory to my own experience, that I don't credit it. It's like the D&D satanism panics or something.

by lmm 2y ago

rubslopes 2y ago

As an introvert, I can’t imagine how awful it would be if I were still receiving focus-breaking phone calls all day like in the ’90s.

yamazakiwi 2y ago

Yeah I think a lot of people are just old in this thread and are nodding along because that's how it used to be. They're talking for everyone as if they are the arbiters of what is sexy for everyone when it's clearly taking popular viewpoints from a specific time, place, and type of person. All of their examples of Phones used to be sexy are stupid. These people are just nostalgic. The fact that they mention NEETs using Pornography and Video Games as supplements for relationship and achievement is a signal. Some people might do that but do you think most of these people would have done other decidedly sexy things had these things not existed? What is your argument? Even if it was true should we then force these men, who don't get attention from women, to do nothing but chase women and fail because it's "romantic", the world does not revolve around you. This woman sounds like those people who denigrate video games and pornography then watch 30 hours of trashy reality television a week and don't see the irony of their own behavior. We get it, your boyfriend won't pay attention to you because your relationship was poor in the first place and now you have an issue with others enjoying themselves. Also, nothing is stopping you from being spontaneous, nothing is forcing you to look up the menu before you go to a restaurant. That is your active decision that you're crying about as if it's what everyone is forced to do. I have no issue being spontaneous and actively choose to not look stuff up all the time. People like this are the same type of people to try and police others behavior but never discover their own flaws or ignore double standards because it benefits them, and yet decry others are living terribly.

snozolli 2y ago
Some people might do that but do you think most of these people would have done other decidedly sexy things had these things not existed? Yes. Look at surveys of sexual activity. Not everyone would be more sexually successful, but the average would be different. Here's an example: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7293001/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7293001/ In this survey study of US adults from 2000 to 2018, sexual inactivity increased among men aged 18 to 24 years and 25 to 34 years and women aged 25 to 34 years during the study period, with the increase among men mainly occurring among unmarried individuals. Men with lower income and with part-time or no employment were more likely to be sexually inactive, as were men and women who were students.
- yamazakiwi 2y ago
  While these trends exist, they don't directly correlate with the invention of the smart phone or the behaviors the poster is stating are unsexy. It has more to do with social education, reduction of religion, and many other factors not discussed in their post.
  - snozolli 2y ago
    Those were two confident assertions with zero supporting evidence. Smartphone use is correlated with depression: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10587281/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10587281/ Social media use is correlated with depression in young adults: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4853817/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4853817/ These are just two results from a 30 second Google search. There is a ton of information out there that directly correlates both social media and immediate, ubiquitous access to it (i.e. smartphones) with negative social outcomes, including suicide rates.
    - lmm 2y ago
      Honestly "smartphone bad" is such a popular thing to publish and claim, and so directly contradictory to my own experience, that I don't credit it. It's like the D&D satanism panics or something.