4 ms·

This is sadly true, my long term partner left me last night. I really thought it would go the distance, and I’m almost not sad - it’s just typical

whamlastxmas 2y ago
Hope you do something kind for yourself to feel better <3
nadermx 2y ago
[flagged]
- avtar 2y ago
  > And if she leaves me, it's because I failed in some way or another With all due respect, chances are this view won't be helpful in the long run. It's challenging enough to influence our own minds or predict with certainty what journeys they'll embark on, let alone assume we can be responsible for another person's happiness.
  - nadermx 2y ago
    I don't mean I failed to make her happy. I mean I failed in asserting myself or sacrificing my happiness for her. As her happiness generally feeds of mine.
    - purple-leafy 2y ago
      This is how I feel, I sacrificed a lot of my sanity and happiness to support them, and the spotlight was always on me as I was sad and stressed in the end. I think going forward I will always put myself first
      - em-bee 2y ago
        i hear you. here is what i came up with as a good way to put it: i can't be expected to take care of my family and my kids if i am not well myself. people (especially in china) tell me (and others) that parents need to sacrifice their own well being for their children, and my response is, if i give up my own well being then my children will suffer. they say, i need to be strong for them and for my partner. but i can only be strong if i am healthy. if you like a metaphor: on an airplane they always tell you to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others. that's what this is. i keep myself healthy, to get the energy i need to be strong for my family.
      - stevenAthompson 2y ago
        I've heard it phrased as "put on your own oxygen mask first." I like that phrasing as it doesn't sound selfish in that context and most people can immediately understand why it's necessary.
- breaker-kind 2y ago
  [flagged]
  - nadermx 2y ago
    How so? Taking accountability for my actions in a relationship and standing up for myself is misogyny?
- jmye 2y ago
  > Vs if she's happy her mood might change on a whim due to period or other things What a weird point of view. I assume that asking your SO if they’re upset because she’s on her period, you might start to have a good idea of why your SO isn’t happy. I’d rather be the person I want to be in a relationship, than play weird games about whose happiness matters more, like it’s a competition. But you do you.
  - nadermx 2y ago
    Its not a game; It's a fact. The definition of hormonal is related to menstruation. I also didn't say I asked if she was, just something I consider when responding to her actions or words.

whamlastxmas 2y ago

Hope you do something kind for yourself to feel better <3

nadermx 2y ago

[flagged]

avtar 2y ago
> And if she leaves me, it's because I failed in some way or another With all due respect, chances are this view won't be helpful in the long run. It's challenging enough to influence our own minds or predict with certainty what journeys they'll embark on, let alone assume we can be responsible for another person's happiness.
- nadermx 2y ago
  I don't mean I failed to make her happy. I mean I failed in asserting myself or sacrificing my happiness for her. As her happiness generally feeds of mine.
  - purple-leafy 2y ago
    This is how I feel, I sacrificed a lot of my sanity and happiness to support them, and the spotlight was always on me as I was sad and stressed in the end. I think going forward I will always put myself first
    - em-bee 2y ago
      i hear you. here is what i came up with as a good way to put it: i can't be expected to take care of my family and my kids if i am not well myself. people (especially in china) tell me (and others) that parents need to sacrifice their own well being for their children, and my response is, if i give up my own well being then my children will suffer. they say, i need to be strong for them and for my partner. but i can only be strong if i am healthy. if you like a metaphor: on an airplane they always tell you to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others. that's what this is. i keep myself healthy, to get the energy i need to be strong for my family.
    - stevenAthompson 2y ago
      I've heard it phrased as "put on your own oxygen mask first." I like that phrasing as it doesn't sound selfish in that context and most people can immediately understand why it's necessary.
breaker-kind 2y ago
[flagged]
- nadermx 2y ago
  How so? Taking accountability for my actions in a relationship and standing up for myself is misogyny?
jmye 2y ago
> Vs if she's happy her mood might change on a whim due to period or other things What a weird point of view. I assume that asking your SO if they’re upset because she’s on her period, you might start to have a good idea of why your SO isn’t happy. I’d rather be the person I want to be in a relationship, than play weird games about whose happiness matters more, like it’s a competition. But you do you.
- nadermx 2y ago
  Its not a game; It's a fact. The definition of hormonal is related to menstruation. I also didn't say I asked if she was, just something I consider when responding to her actions or words.