4 ms·
> Social media and dating apps has made physical attraction more paramount than ever but I can’t do shit about it. Maybe don't look for relationships on social
by rocmcd 2y ago
> Social media and dating apps has made physical attraction more paramount than ever but I can’t do shit about it.
Maybe don't look for relationships on social media and dating apps? There's a whole world out there that you won't be able to access through a screen, but you have to go out and find it. It will not come to you.
And I don't know you, but I can almost universally promise that surgery will not change the outcome. Are you physically fit? Do you smile and laugh when around other people? Do you hold yourself in high esteem? Get the basics right and the rest will follow.
- bradlys 2y agoSounds like you haven't been on the dating market in a long time. There is no "just world" when it comes to human sexuality. Some people are born physically unattractive. Most people who are college educated meet on dating apps these days. You're not going to escape lookism either by just waving some magic wand about how if you meet someone in person they suddenly can't see your face anymore.
- mike_hearn 2y ago> You're not going to escape lookism either by just waving some magic wand about how if you meet someone in person they suddenly can't see your face anymore. Yeah, you probably are actually. Unless you're literally disfigured most women don't care that much about the physical appearance of men compared to other things. Men care way more about this. Finding beautiful women on the arm of a man who is old or unattractive man is easy, if he has other attributes women like more. Dating apps don't change that. It just means you have to meet and impress women outside of them. And obviously be willing to consider non-college educated, it doesn't mean they're dumb. I met my wife four years ago, which is how long you say you've been single for. We didn't do it via a dating app, she isn't college educated, and I'm a guy of average looks yet she could easily be a model if she wanted. She also has a wonderful personality, a razor sharp intellect and is fluent in two foreign languages. There were a bunch of strategies that went into achieving that outcome that I won't go into here, but suffice it to say none of them involved surgery. They're all about how you make her feel. Not saying it's easy (it isn't), but how to do this is learnable with practice.
- bradlys 2y ago> Finding beautiful women on the arm of a man who is old or unattractive man is easy, if he has other attributes women like more. Only seen this with gold diggers. I’ve never seen this in any other circumstance. It’s well accepted that modern couples are mostly paired off by their looks. You’re not seeing models with average looking guys unless she’s trying to escape poverty - which means she’s not with you but with your money. I live in nyc and never see mismatched looks couples.
- mike_hearn 2y agoYes I know about the psychology papers that you're referring to, and wealth can be one of those attributes, but there are many others and it wasn't that in this case. She certainly did not need to escape poverty.
- bradlys 2y agoYou’re also in Europe. The culture is very different. I’m living in regions where homes regularly cost $3m. It’s unfortunate but people of similar backgrounds pair off here cause it’s unfair otherwise.
- Gvaskas 2y ago[flagged]
- mike_hearn 2y agoThen you misunderstood because that isn't the case at all. We met where I live and wealth had nothing to do with it. We are both european.
- Gvaskas 2y ago[flagged]