3 ms·

It mostly just comes down to having kids, right? I am certain that if I were single and happy staying that way, I would be living in a van in Moab and doing the

It mostly just comes down to having kids, right? I am certain that if I were single and happy staying that way, I would be living in a van in Moab and doing the bare minimum amount of freelancing to keep myself fed.

coldpie 2y ago
I don't think so. I have a wife, but we have no kids and will not have any, and a lot of savings, but I could not do something like this. If my income was less than my spending, I would feel incredible stress knowing there's this Time Limit To Doom hanging over my head. I'd also worry what a gap like that would do to my future job prospects. (I'm not saying I'm correct to feel that way, but that I would feel that way, and it would ruin things for me.) I also don't particularly enjoy traveling or lounging about, so those kinds of stories never appeal to me. I enjoy working. It is what it is, /shrug :)
- sbrother 2y ago
  That makes total sense, thanks for articulating it so clearly. Sometimes I wish I felt more that way, or at least that I could get myself to hate corporate work less. I do enjoy working for myself and freelancing, and that was all I did before I had a family to support. Now it’s too much risk to give up a steady paycheck and subsidized health insurance before my kids are off to college.
tenpies 2y ago
I think it also comes down to relationships. I would personally be extremely content living a very spartan life. If there were a barracks type arrangement where I just get a small room with desk and bathroom, and all food preparation were handled for me for a reasonable fee, access to a gym, and solid internet I'd be all over it. But the minute you enter a romantic relationship, that generally stops being an acceptable living situation.
- purplethinking 2y ago
  Why is there such a difference between men and women on this? I literally lived in a closet as a student. I'm quite content as long as I have a nice desk and chair, good internet, access to a gym and perhaps afford to eat out.
  - dennis_jeeves2 2y ago
    >Why is there such a difference between men and women on this? Biological answer: women had to hold on to resources to care for their ofspring, so it's hardwired. Politically incorrect answer: they are self entitled nutcases. If you think you are spending significantly more than what you think you can afford, dump your wife if she doesn't agree to downgrade on the lifestyle to save on expenses
    - purplethinking 2y ago
      That escalated quickly! I think biology has probably shaped us to worry about different things. As you say, I think it's probably that women look for a mate that can provide a good environment for raising kids. There's also the status aspect. Men are also status sensitive but it seems like they are much more willing to sacrifice status short term in order to focus on work and earning money long term, while women want a nice house etc no matter what, and it's up to the man to provide.

coldpie 2y ago

I don't think so. I have a wife, but we have no kids and will not have any, and a lot of savings, but I could not do something like this. If my income was less than my spending, I would feel incredible stress knowing there's this Time Limit To Doom hanging over my head. I'd also worry what a gap like that would do to my future job prospects. (I'm not saying I'm correct to feel that way, but that I would feel that way, and it would ruin things for me.) I also don't particularly enjoy traveling or lounging about, so those kinds of stories never appeal to me. I enjoy working. It is what it is, /shrug :)

sbrother 2y ago
That makes total sense, thanks for articulating it so clearly. Sometimes I wish I felt more that way, or at least that I could get myself to hate corporate work less. I do enjoy working for myself and freelancing, and that was all I did before I had a family to support. Now it’s too much risk to give up a steady paycheck and subsidized health insurance before my kids are off to college.

tenpies 2y ago

I think it also comes down to relationships. I would personally be extremely content living a very spartan life. If there were a barracks type arrangement where I just get a small room with desk and bathroom, and all food preparation were handled for me for a reasonable fee, access to a gym, and solid internet I'd be all over it. But the minute you enter a romantic relationship, that generally stops being an acceptable living situation.

purplethinking 2y ago
Why is there such a difference between men and women on this? I literally lived in a closet as a student. I'm quite content as long as I have a nice desk and chair, good internet, access to a gym and perhaps afford to eat out.
- dennis_jeeves2 2y ago
  >Why is there such a difference between men and women on this? Biological answer: women had to hold on to resources to care for their ofspring, so it's hardwired. Politically incorrect answer: they are self entitled nutcases. If you think you are spending significantly more than what you think you can afford, dump your wife if she doesn't agree to downgrade on the lifestyle to save on expenses
  - purplethinking 2y ago
    That escalated quickly! I think biology has probably shaped us to worry about different things. As you say, I think it's probably that women look for a mate that can provide a good environment for raising kids. There's also the status aspect. Men are also status sensitive but it seems like they are much more willing to sacrifice status short term in order to focus on work and earning money long term, while women want a nice house etc no matter what, and it's up to the man to provide.