6 ms·
Maybe it is stereotypical, but I would score high on IQ but abysmally low on EQ. So, I have no chance of ever being considered wise.
by irrational 2y ago
Maybe it is stereotypical, but I would score high on IQ but abysmally low on EQ. So, I have no chance of ever being considered wise.
- deleted 2y ago[deleted]
- prewett 2y agoEQ is definitely learnable. Over twenty years I've gone from clueless to perceptive if I'm paying attention. Unfortunately, in familiar groups where I feel emotionally safe, I tend not to pay the attention as much and just enjoy myself, and then I say things without thinking through how other people might perceive them.
- caseyy 2y agoHow does one learn to think about the emotional “room temperature” before they speak? My mind doesn’t work that way so I’m curious. Does one pause before every sentence and play out a little scenario in their head of how people will respond? It would do me so much good to improve in this area.
- micromacrofoot 2y agosimply pausing before speaking, even for a second, has done wonders for me... you can gain a little more time with a well placed "hmmm" occasionally
- adamc 2y agoThat's a hard question to answer, because I do it automatically, 100% of the time. For me it's probably a result of childhood trauma (and maybe a high degree of empathy). I suspect most people learn to do it as the result of bad experiences. As with many things, that's more likely in childhood.
- adamc 2y agoThe good news is that EQ will go up with life experience if 1) you care about it, and 2) you pay attention. Caring is a big part because it motivates you to pay attention and act on what you learn. (Not caring can also be beneficial -- it makes it much easier to just focus on the technical parts. As with everything, there are trade-offs.)