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I get the feeling that this person is fairly young. I'm 62, and have been through a fair amount. I lost both my parents, many years ago, and many friends, acqu

I get the feeling that this person is fairly young. I'm 62, and have been through a fair amount. I lost both my parents, many years ago, and many friends, acquaintances, frenemies, enemies, coworkers, bosses, etc., along the way. In the 1990s, a fair number of folks in my immediate circle died of AIDS. That's a bad way to go. In the last 35 years or so, I have seen numerous folks die of cancer. That's not even mentioning the ones that died from overdoses, suicides, and other violent means. I travel in eclectic circles. Once we have some gray in our coiffures, we have generally endured a fair bit of loss. For some folks, this pain is unbearable, and they deal with it by rejecting intimate relationships, or by becoming hard-boiled and cynical. I have been greatly helped, along the way, by folks that have fallen by the wayside. Sometimes, by death, other times, just because we grew apart, for one reason or another. I have also had the signal Honor to help many others. They haven't always been grateful. There's a cynical Mark Twain quote that goes: "If you take a starving dog, and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man." Engaging with others, is difficult. It requires self-reflection, compromise, humility, and forgiveness (both of others, and of ourselves). In my experience, it has been well worth it. Satisfied customer. Would recommend to others. WFM. YMMV.

roenxi 2y ago
I'd add in that, over the course of a life, we'd expect maybe about half the people we personally meet to die before us. Everyone dies, and that makes for some relatively sombre statistical realities. If you are meeting a lot of people, there isn't time to stop and get worked up when you know people who are experiencing grief from a death once removed - there are going to be a lot of deaths.
keybored 2y ago
These short personal blogs make some absolute statement about Existence and how Things Are in order to get across the point that they are not in that great of a space right now. > Life is cruel. Life is sad. Life is lonely. Sometimes, at home, I just feel like crying. The point is not to make serious rational argument that we are alone or that being alone is how to live. For us to then counter-argue as if they were seriously adopting this attitude as a conscious life strategy while of a sound-and-stable mind. So I can’t discern whether your response is tone-deaf or if you’re just doing the usual HN CV hustling, but literal CV this time.
- ChrisMarshallNY 2y ago
  Nah. Just fishing for the typical HN veiled insult. Thanks. Much appreciated.
  - keybored 2y ago
    It’s not just about you. The submitter is likely to be the OP given their history. “Life is meaningless.” (Unrelated example to illustrate the point.) This means different things depending the context, like if the person was depressed or if they were a professional philosopher.
    - ChrisMarshallNY 2y ago
      Which is kind of why I didn't actually address their points, and simply added my own experience, from what their post brought up in me, without trying to analyze them (besides that they are young). Their grief, and their anxiety, are not really something that I can realistically appreciate, and I doubt there's much I could say, that would make anything better. I do appreciate their sharing vulnerably, and have no intentions of exacerbating their personal pain. Figuring people out, from extremely small sample sizes, is a skill that I sometimes think that I have, but, in reality, completely lack.

roenxi 2y ago

I'd add in that, over the course of a life, we'd expect maybe about half the people we personally meet to die before us. Everyone dies, and that makes for some relatively sombre statistical realities. If you are meeting a lot of people, there isn't time to stop and get worked up when you know people who are experiencing grief from a death once removed - there are going to be a lot of deaths.

keybored 2y ago

These short personal blogs make some absolute statement about Existence and how Things Are in order to get across the point that they are not in that great of a space right now. > Life is cruel. Life is sad. Life is lonely. Sometimes, at home, I just feel like crying. The point is not to make serious rational argument that we are alone or that being alone is how to live. For us to then counter-argue as if they were seriously adopting this attitude as a conscious life strategy while of a sound-and-stable mind. So I can’t discern whether your response is tone-deaf or if you’re just doing the usual HN CV hustling, but literal CV this time.

ChrisMarshallNY 2y ago
Nah. Just fishing for the typical HN veiled insult. Thanks. Much appreciated.
- keybored 2y ago
  It’s not just about you. The submitter is likely to be the OP given their history. “Life is meaningless.” (Unrelated example to illustrate the point.) This means different things depending the context, like if the person was depressed or if they were a professional philosopher.
  - ChrisMarshallNY 2y ago
    Which is kind of why I didn't actually address their points, and simply added my own experience, from what their post brought up in me, without trying to analyze them (besides that they are young). Their grief, and their anxiety, are not really something that I can realistically appreciate, and I doubt there's much I could say, that would make anything better. I do appreciate their sharing vulnerably, and have no intentions of exacerbating their personal pain. Figuring people out, from extremely small sample sizes, is a skill that I sometimes think that I have, but, in reality, completely lack.