10 ms·
To add additional context to my other reply, I do not find this question rude, but I do get frustrated with people who seem to think our food problem is easy to
by cortesoft 2y ago
To add additional context to my other reply, I do not find this question rude, but I do get frustrated with people who seem to think our food problem is easy to solve.
My wife and I have agonized for most of our daughter's life about feeding her. She has autism and ADHD, and will often forget to eat if we do not work hard to get her to eat. If she eats a food whose textures, smell, or taste trigger her, she will vomit immediately. She hates to vomit, and will refuse to eat ANYTHING after this happens (even her comfort foods). She doesn't want to be around food at all at that point.
She is very small for her age and underweight (we have routine consultations with her endocrinologist on her growth, and have had countless conversations on whether we should start growth hormones with her. There are so many things to consider around that decision, it has been quite a challenge).
We have a dietician that we consult with regularly, both about her eating and her growth. She, along with both our endocrinologist and pediatrician, feel that getting her calories is the most important thing, and that we can sacrifice quality for quantity, because even when she has freedom to eat whatever junk she wants, she has trouble eating enough. Both the dietician and her therapist think it is very important we never turn food into a battle, since she already has so many issues around eating that we don't want to make it worse.
I appreciate your question being in good faith, but I do get frustrated when people make comments about my daughter's diet, as if we haven't agonized over this for the 8 years of her life. This is something we deal with every day, and I find it both frustrating and amusing when people think they can solve the problem in a single internet comment.
Things that work for some kids don't work for all kids.
- ranger_danger 2y agoVery well thought out response, I appreciate it. I think it's easy for people to form strong opinions about things they are shielded from the consequences of. When I made that comment I lacked all of this context of being underweight, having already struggled with this for so many years and also regularly seeing all the different types of doctors that you go to, so without that information I think it's easier for people to jump to conclusions, but I understand it can be time-consuming to add all that context every time you want to comment. As you can imagine a lot of people are quick to call out things that might look like bad parenting when they assume none of that context exists. Good luck!
- cortesoft 2y agoThanks, and this is exactly why I took the time to type out the longer reply. I could tell from your phrasing of the question that it was made in good faith, and was not an unreasonable question in the abstract. I figured giving a more detailed reply would help you and others see all of the things that make the real situation more complicated than it might seem on the surface.
- saagarjha 2y agoHi. I am told that this was basically me when I was young. Picky eater, vomiting, consistently 5th percentile on the growth charts. And to top it off my favorite food was, you guessed it, McDonald's chicken nuggets. My parents tried all sorts of things–making my "favorite" foods, repeatedly serving the same food until I would eat it (I wouldn't), begging and pleading, various punishments. None of it really worked. Well, I grew out of it in my teenage years. No guarantee that your daughter will too but I figured you might want to hear that there might be hope in your future :) P.S. I am vegetarian now. Go figure.