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Yeah, uh, ever lived with a depressed person? You cannot get them to do anything. They only care about how sad they feel and care nothing about the effects the

Yeah, uh, ever lived with a depressed person? You cannot get them to do anything. They only care about how sad they feel and care nothing about the effects their constant bed hiding imposes on all the people around them. It is utterly impossible to get them to treat themselves because... That involves getting out of bed . The depressive loop in the mind has built in defenses that keep it from being treated. A depressed person often wants to be depressed because they take condition it and don't want to face all the things they could have been doing instead, a sort of procrastination on media steroids. The best treatment for depression, exercise, involves setting all the micro behaviors that depression uses to perpetuate itself.

nrr 2y ago
"A depressed person often wants to be depressed ..." I'd caution against expressing it this way. It's less a want and more a ground state. I am one of these depressives, and I definitely do not want to spend all day in bed. It is, however, a ground state that takes an amazing amount of energy to escape, so my usual inclination is to conserve energy and not escape. It may outwardly look to non-depressives as a strong desire to spend the day in bed and away from the world except through whatever portal the Internet gives us, but it's my experience that having someone to come by to help with the parts of living that fatigue me is direly, overwhelmingly underrated. And, like, it isn't often chores or errands that are the most helpful. (Indeed, when my depression saps me enough, I find that just going on a cleaning binge is a cheap way to recover for a while.) No, rather, it's stupid shit like having someone make decisions for me so that I can get un-stuck from whatever mental hell I've fallen into. The challenge is usually articulating which decisions I need made because merely unpacking them has a high energy cost. It's only when I've gotten a handle on the fatigue each day that I'm truly able to get moving.
- Terr_ 2y ago
  > ground state I often find myself reaching for the term "anticipatory anhedonia": When someone doesn't feel happiness looking forward to things that are coming. Oh, they might be happy during the activity, and they might abstractly know that they'll enjoy it a lot, the gut-reaction during the planning phase is that it's a to-do item that might be a big hassle.
bankcust08385 2y ago
Sort of. Extreme self-centeredness, inability to concentrate or prioritize, and low energy. There is no "best," one-size-fits-all treatment for depression. There are many possible holistic, overlapping habits and treatment options.
lemonwaterlime 2y ago
Yes, when you’re depressed you should make yourself exercise. Every time.
- cultofmetatron 2y ago
  > you’re depressed you should make yourself exercise. Every time. works for me. plus a daily spoonful of cod liver oil. the best defense against depression is discipline to do what you have to do even when there's no dopamine coming.
- chownie 2y ago
  Since we're chiming in, exercise doesn't usually improve my condition when I'm depressed and occasionally instead exacerbates it.
  - lemonwaterlime 2y ago
    There's always someone saying a treatment or diet or so on had no effect on them. The fact of the matter is that exercising is a thing that most people can do with their own bodies, and it has a positive effect versus depression for most people as well. It would be much better for a person to realize the exercise doesn't help their depression than to never try it and never have any path to solution. What I did not see from any of the responses is what did you do instead? Exercising did not work. What did you do? At least the people positing exercise as an answer gave an actionable response. And it does work. Nothing works for everyone.
  - effingwewt 2y ago
    Rather try physical movement then and build up to exercise. If you are consistent for long enough the body begins to crave it and you feel better afterwards. Maybe walk then run. Or pushups then pull ups then dulbells then weights. Swimming can be a great cardio and total musculature system workout. Find what you can do and try and remain consistent through the loss of motivation, as that will happen. I know everyone is different but it's been infinitely more effective and a positive in my life than any medications I'd tried. If you need someone to help cheer you on I updated my bio to include my email.
coolThingsFirst 2y ago
Oh how I wish this was true. I've a high propensity for depression because basically my life has been very difficult. Was late to many many milestones in my life - I know it's individual but I've missed out on a ton of things. Last time it hit me was the worst. Despite having a great toolset for dealing with it because it wasn't the first time, it was by the worst that I have ever seen. I went to the gym and became fit and muscular. Added a ton of muscle even had visible abs but it barely did anything. If it did anything it was so small that it was barely noticable. Meditation didn't help. Nothing did. Just flashbacks persistent anxiety to the point where I couldn't even relax to have a chill conversation with anyone I was in robotic mode. It was triggered by heartbreak & the covid. The worst was the inability to focus no matter the coffee my brain was just barely working. Attention span was at most 15 minutes. Everything seemed boring. The default state was so utterly bleak that a video on YT where people were chill and laughing was like absurd. The fatigue and lack of focus were the worst my mind just didn't grab onto things like it did before. It was terrifying. I'm out of it now and happy as a clam. I'm not wiser at all through the process. What I've found is that this world is out of our control and if life wants us tomorrow to dismantle us. There are no guides, no tips, no tricks, no plans, no escaping to reason, no escaping to the gym nor anything like that. Depression hits the control unit of the mind.
pushupentry1219 2y ago
> You cannot get them to do anything. They only care about how sad they feel and care nothing about the effects their constant bed hiding imposes on all the people around them. It is utterly impossible to get them to treat themselves because... That involves getting out of bed . Please don't use your anecdata to lump all depressed people into this bucket. I've been depressed for over a decade (diagnosed MDD) and this does not reflect me or my actions at all. In fact I've felt insanely guilty that my mood affects the others around me. This just causes me mask the depression, making me less likely to reach out to anyone when things get bad. I guess I'd be what you'd call high-functioning depression. I've lived with it for so long its all I know. I moped my way to school, I did my work poorly, barely passed. Now I mope my way to work and I work and when I'm not burnt out I do a good enough job and then I go home and cry and go to sleep. I would love to spend all day in bed, mostly because I'm constantly tired, and mostly because it's far more comfortable than doing anything else. But I have enough will and discipline to get up and do normal shit even if I'm cripplingly sad, bored, tired, and sometimes even teary eyed all day. As for exercise, it helps me immensely! But I have in no way been cured by exercise alone.

nrr 2y ago

"A depressed person often wants to be depressed ..." I'd caution against expressing it this way. It's less a want and more a ground state. I am one of these depressives, and I definitely do not want to spend all day in bed. It is, however, a ground state that takes an amazing amount of energy to escape, so my usual inclination is to conserve energy and not escape. It may outwardly look to non-depressives as a strong desire to spend the day in bed and away from the world except through whatever portal the Internet gives us, but it's my experience that having someone to come by to help with the parts of living that fatigue me is direly, overwhelmingly underrated. And, like, it isn't often chores or errands that are the most helpful. (Indeed, when my depression saps me enough, I find that just going on a cleaning binge is a cheap way to recover for a while.) No, rather, it's stupid shit like having someone make decisions for me so that I can get un-stuck from whatever mental hell I've fallen into. The challenge is usually articulating which decisions I need made because merely unpacking them has a high energy cost. It's only when I've gotten a handle on the fatigue each day that I'm truly able to get moving.

Terr_ 2y ago
> ground state I often find myself reaching for the term "anticipatory anhedonia": When someone doesn't feel happiness looking forward to things that are coming. Oh, they might be happy during the activity, and they might abstractly know that they'll enjoy it a lot, the gut-reaction during the planning phase is that it's a to-do item that might be a big hassle.

bankcust08385 2y ago

Sort of. Extreme self-centeredness, inability to concentrate or prioritize, and low energy. There is no "best," one-size-fits-all treatment for depression. There are many possible holistic, overlapping habits and treatment options.

lemonwaterlime 2y ago

Yes, when you’re depressed you should make yourself exercise. Every time.

cultofmetatron 2y ago
> you’re depressed you should make yourself exercise. Every time. works for me. plus a daily spoonful of cod liver oil. the best defense against depression is discipline to do what you have to do even when there's no dopamine coming.
chownie 2y ago
Since we're chiming in, exercise doesn't usually improve my condition when I'm depressed and occasionally instead exacerbates it.
- lemonwaterlime 2y ago
  There's always someone saying a treatment or diet or so on had no effect on them. The fact of the matter is that exercising is a thing that most people can do with their own bodies, and it has a positive effect versus depression for most people as well. It would be much better for a person to realize the exercise doesn't help their depression than to never try it and never have any path to solution. What I did not see from any of the responses is what did you do instead? Exercising did not work. What did you do? At least the people positing exercise as an answer gave an actionable response. And it does work. Nothing works for everyone.
- effingwewt 2y ago
  Rather try physical movement then and build up to exercise. If you are consistent for long enough the body begins to crave it and you feel better afterwards. Maybe walk then run. Or pushups then pull ups then dulbells then weights. Swimming can be a great cardio and total musculature system workout. Find what you can do and try and remain consistent through the loss of motivation, as that will happen. I know everyone is different but it's been infinitely more effective and a positive in my life than any medications I'd tried. If you need someone to help cheer you on I updated my bio to include my email.

coolThingsFirst 2y ago

Oh how I wish this was true. I've a high propensity for depression because basically my life has been very difficult. Was late to many many milestones in my life - I know it's individual but I've missed out on a ton of things. Last time it hit me was the worst. Despite having a great toolset for dealing with it because it wasn't the first time, it was by the worst that I have ever seen. I went to the gym and became fit and muscular. Added a ton of muscle even had visible abs but it barely did anything. If it did anything it was so small that it was barely noticable. Meditation didn't help. Nothing did. Just flashbacks persistent anxiety to the point where I couldn't even relax to have a chill conversation with anyone I was in robotic mode. It was triggered by heartbreak & the covid. The worst was the inability to focus no matter the coffee my brain was just barely working. Attention span was at most 15 minutes. Everything seemed boring. The default state was so utterly bleak that a video on YT where people were chill and laughing was like absurd. The fatigue and lack of focus were the worst my mind just didn't grab onto things like it did before. It was terrifying. I'm out of it now and happy as a clam. I'm not wiser at all through the process. What I've found is that this world is out of our control and if life wants us tomorrow to dismantle us. There are no guides, no tips, no tricks, no plans, no escaping to reason, no escaping to the gym nor anything like that. Depression hits the control unit of the mind.

pushupentry1219 2y ago

> You cannot get them to do anything. They only care about how sad they feel and care nothing about the effects their constant bed hiding imposes on all the people around them. It is utterly impossible to get them to treat themselves because... That involves getting out of bed . Please don't use your anecdata to lump all depressed people into this bucket. I've been depressed for over a decade (diagnosed MDD) and this does not reflect me or my actions at all. In fact I've felt insanely guilty that my mood affects the others around me. This just causes me mask the depression, making me less likely to reach out to anyone when things get bad. I guess I'd be what you'd call high-functioning depression. I've lived with it for so long its all I know. I moped my way to school, I did my work poorly, barely passed. Now I mope my way to work and I work and when I'm not burnt out I do a good enough job and then I go home and cry and go to sleep. I would love to spend all day in bed, mostly because I'm constantly tired, and mostly because it's far more comfortable than doing anything else. But I have enough will and discipline to get up and do normal shit even if I'm cripplingly sad, bored, tired, and sometimes even teary eyed all day. As for exercise, it helps me immensely! But I have in no way been cured by exercise alone.