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I think it depends a lot on both the individual and how the time is spent at home. For folks who have engaging hobbies and other activities that lend themselve
by eitally 2y ago
I think it depends a lot on both the individual and how the time is spent at home. For folks who have engaging hobbies and other activities that lend themselves to home-based practice, it's entirely different than those for whom time at home is basically being shut-in and reclusive with little mental & emotional stimulation.
- s1artibartfast 2y agoAnd also depends on if you have people over and a lot of human interaction in your home. Hosting a BBQ dinner party with family and friends it's obviously different than sitting alone browsing Netflix or reddit
- jaredcwhite 2y ago> time at home is basically being shut-in and reclusive with little mental & emotional stimulation Me! That's me! I can barely even get to a mere 24 hours at home without feeling stir-crazy, and more than that you might as well dump ants all over my skin. But I'm very aware of other people (including family members I know) who are perfectly fine with days spent going nowhere…perhaps rarely even leaving their room. It makes no sense to me, but clearly this issue is very personality-dependent.
- ethbr1 2y ago> engaging hobbies It's an important point. To use a nutrition metaphor, there are many new easily-available empty calories at home these days, that weren't previously available. The web. Online gaming. Social media. Streaming. Yet venturing outside into a social environment delivers a higher minimum level of nutritional value. You see other breathing humans, experience empathy and nature, and move your body. And critically... exercise being comfortable with being uncomfortable. (Aka, life) One of the quickest paths to crazy these days is becoming too comfortable in a stable, static, self-reinforcing life. You don't get any feedback that you're drifting pretty far off the median. (I mean, has anyone actually seen the Earth's curvature...?) Reality has a well-known bias towards reinforcing common sense and reminding you when you're wrong.
- bulatb 2y ago> You see other breathing humans ...who will cheerfully explain to you that you're unhappy, your hobbies are empty, your choices as wrong, and how much happier you'd be if you'd just value what they value and like what they like and stop being you and start being them.
- ethbr1 2y agohttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XvfImv9NseY&t=12s https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XvfImv9NseY&t=12s Cash in your ticket or get some joy out of the game.
- bulatb 2y agoSorry for the snark. That was unproductive. My point is that if Alice has what she wants, Bob will not convince her that she doesn't by explaining that she ought to want what Bob wants, which she doesn't have or want. Especially if what Bob wants, and Alice doesn't, is for Alice to be social with Bob. "You don't live the way I want to" is an observation, not an argument for anyone to change their values or their life.
- ethbr1 2y agoAs a pretty serious introvert who may or may not have had depression during undergrad, my experience has been that the time I most need other people and social situations is exactly when I least feel like I want that. Which has made me suspicious of introversion as a local maximum that nonetheless leaves one depressed. Humans don't seem to be built to self-regulate, 24x7, forever. At some point we go off the rails, and other humans (and/or nature) are a good way to kick things back to normal. (And yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm not a secret extrovert. It can be exhausting being around strangers when I'm down, but sometimes you need to jump off the waterfall and put on that smile that becomes real)
- vladvasiliu 2y ago> my experience has been that the time I most need other people and social situations is exactly when I least feel like I want that. I'm conflicted. I think I get what you're saying, but it doesn't seem to be an argument against bulatb's point, in that both can be true. It's conceivable for me to want to feel like you don't want social interactions and pursue non-directly-social endeavors (think building something, learning an instrument, whatever) without actually being in need of social interaction. I think the point isn't that you should self-regulate 24x7, forever, but to do the social thing on your own terms, not on other people's schedule. Maybe it's a question of quantity. If you only ever do things alone at home and never go out in society, then perhaps there is an issue. It reminds me of alcoholism: wanting to have a drink and saying you're not an alcoholic doesn't mean you're one. It's a question of degree.