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> I'll just drag myself and the team/project/org down I wish everyone had this much self awareness. Some people just hold on for dear life to collect a paychec

> I'll just drag myself and the team/project/org down I wish everyone had this much self awareness. Some people just hold on for dear life to collect a paycheck. I get it, people have a family and bills to pay, but at least use the slack time to find another job.

Jtsummers 2y ago
> I wish everyone had this much self awareness. Thanks, it didn't come easy. A few personal, professional, and academic failures before I got there myself. The last straw was when I realized I was the toxic asshole at a job. Lots of problems, my concerns were real, but my reaction was not helpful for anyone. I bounced and gave myself a mental reset and have been more deliberate about it since then.
- oumua_don17 2y ago
  >> The last straw was when I realized I was the toxic asshole at a job It takes a lot of experience, wisdom and courage to accept and fix that. What other factors do you think helped you fix it? Financial security which allows one to take breaks or top notch in demand skills that helps one find a new job quickly come to mind, but it could something non-material and I am interested in hearing that. Thanks for sharing your journey.
  - Jtsummers 2y ago
    It's been a busy day, so I'll say that after that the main thing that helped me was finally accepting I have issues with anxiety and doing something about it. Things that most people would consider small get blown out of proportion in my head (or can). And many small things become insurmountable to me, or excessively frustrating. Cognitive behavioral therapy, in particular, helped me a lot with dealing with it. I still have anxiety issues, but now I see it coming and react in better and more effective ways than becoming burnt out, frustrated, depressed, toxic, or whatever else I had done prior to that.
anal_reactor 2y ago
I'm sorry but it's incredibly difficult to find such a job. My work history isn't long, but out of all companies I've worked for, all of them sucked in their own, unique ways. Currently I'm at a company that's moving away from coding towards having meetings over processes, and honestly, the pay is good while expectations are low, which allows me to just cruise.
markus_zhang 2y ago
The problem is once I'm deep into a certain job all recruiters assume that I should continue working on this type of job. It's extremely difficult to switch career.

Jtsummers 2y ago

> I wish everyone had this much self awareness. Thanks, it didn't come easy. A few personal, professional, and academic failures before I got there myself. The last straw was when I realized I was the toxic asshole at a job. Lots of problems, my concerns were real, but my reaction was not helpful for anyone. I bounced and gave myself a mental reset and have been more deliberate about it since then.

oumua_don17 2y ago
>> The last straw was when I realized I was the toxic asshole at a job It takes a lot of experience, wisdom and courage to accept and fix that. What other factors do you think helped you fix it? Financial security which allows one to take breaks or top notch in demand skills that helps one find a new job quickly come to mind, but it could something non-material and I am interested in hearing that. Thanks for sharing your journey.
- Jtsummers 2y ago
  It's been a busy day, so I'll say that after that the main thing that helped me was finally accepting I have issues with anxiety and doing something about it. Things that most people would consider small get blown out of proportion in my head (or can). And many small things become insurmountable to me, or excessively frustrating. Cognitive behavioral therapy, in particular, helped me a lot with dealing with it. I still have anxiety issues, but now I see it coming and react in better and more effective ways than becoming burnt out, frustrated, depressed, toxic, or whatever else I had done prior to that.

anal_reactor 2y ago

I'm sorry but it's incredibly difficult to find such a job. My work history isn't long, but out of all companies I've worked for, all of them sucked in their own, unique ways. Currently I'm at a company that's moving away from coding towards having meetings over processes, and honestly, the pay is good while expectations are low, which allows me to just cruise.

markus_zhang 2y ago

The problem is once I'm deep into a certain job all recruiters assume that I should continue working on this type of job. It's extremely difficult to switch career.