For me personally, it's about meeting as many people and being the best version of yourself. When you do those things, then you gotta find a person you match we

For me personally, it's about meeting as many people and being the best version of yourself. When you do those things, then you gotta find a person you match well with. I've met over 10000 people that were a potential romantic interest. I did this (mostly) during the day by giving them a genuine compliment or asking them a question that I was curious about or by stating an observation that happened in our environment. I'd do my best to mix in playfulness as well. Playfulness is key for me as I tend to take life too seriously. The reason I found my wife was because I was willing to be fine with 9950 rejections, 45 people it didn't work out with, 2 short relationships and 2 long relationships. It fucking hurted, especially initially since I had really unhelpful beliefs about myself (unlovable, etc. but doomed to try to find love anyway). The statistics aren't fully accurate, but I'm pretty sure they're around that ballpark (that, or the rejection rate is even higher). The way I circumvented burnout was by playfulness and self-amusement. I knew at least that whatever I was saying that I was entertained/amused/inspired by it. That was a much better mindset to have than thinking whatever I said wasn't good enough from the get go. The first 2 years that I did this (from 17 to 19 years old), I only experienced rejections. Later in life (30+), I also did online dating. Initially, I got 1 match per month for a few months. Then I put on my hacker mindset to see if I could break the game. It took a few months but I eventually got to 150 matches. That was really a question of "if you're not in the 20%, you gotta be smart." Whenever I tell my story to people, they look at me and are like "I don't want to put this much conscious effort in it." Sometimes it's for moral reasons (love should just "flow" or "just happen", it's imperative for the romantic realm to not be analyzed etc.). Some can't handle the emotional pain (for me it was brutal too). Some just hate the sheer effort. But based on what I've seen with friends who are like me: if I didn't put in this effort, it is likely I would've gone nowhere since I have friends a lot like me who didn't put in the effort and they seem to act like a control group in that sense. It is what it is. How badly do you want it? I don't know why, I just knew I wanted it badly. It is what it is.