For me, if I try to visualize something context-less, my visual is very faint and smeared. My mind naturally starts to contextualize it, and when it finds one i

For me, if I try to visualize something context-less, my visual is very faint and smeared. My mind naturally starts to contextualize it, and when it finds one it becomes clearer, although it’s less that I’m visualizing something and more that I’m re-experiencing a memory… what I was doing, how I felt, etc. As a result, I don’t tend to think of an apple. I think of the apples in the fruit drawer that I just looked at, or the apples we turned into cider when I was a child. I don’t see what my mom looks like in my mind so much as remember, and as I’m trying to hold her in my mind to describe her I see a dozen memories of her face that all sort of blend together. I think when I was younger, it was more vivid and simpler. The murky, dark, and fleeting memory/visualization thing has increased over time, and that kind of scares me.