5 ms·

> use it as a weird flex at your next dinner party or restaurant outing with friends/family. Went to a dinner with some of my gfs friends and her in NYC recent

by sva_ 2y ago

> use it as a weird flex at your next dinner party or restaurant outing with friends/family. Went to a dinner with some of my gfs friends and her in NYC recently during my latest trip to the US (they work for Amex apparently). At the end of the dinner they suggested we all just pay separately because it is more simple. It confused me but I didn't mind. I understood it when the waiter held down a silverplate for us to put our credit cards on, and they pulled out their gold and platinum cards respectively, my gf also followed with her platinum card. Then there was me, the only Europoorean at the table, and I put my regular card with a picture of a small kitten on the plate. The waiter complimented me on my card with a smile and I kinda cherish that. American flexes are weird to me, lol. I don't really get it, except for the access to airport lounges with free food/drinks, if you do fly a lot.

addicted 2y ago
I’m not sure what part you were confused about. Splitting charges is very common in the U.S. and has little to do with flexing your credit cards.
- sva_ 2y ago
  I suppose, but we were two couples. I usually pay for my gf, and in the case of a double-date, the other guy usually pays for his gf/wife. I don't have the impression that splitting charges is more common in the US than the gentleman paying for his date. But I guess it does happen. Sometimes my GF insists on paying to even it out a little though.
  - kubectl_h 2y ago
    Two couples = two cards (at most) in my experience. Some people are really particular about bills though. Did you split evenly or itemize the bills?
  - danielhep 2y ago
    At least in my circles, unless it's like a first date, everyone is paying for their own meals. My girlfriend and I put receipts on the fridge and then reconcile them every so often.
- deleted 2y ago
  [deleted]
tehnub 2y ago
It could also be that they wanted the cash-back or rewards they get on those fancy cards.
xarope 2y ago
> card with a picture of a small kitten and now I want to know which card...!
- t0mas88 2y ago
  ING bank lets you design your own card. Upload a picture and they print it.
eru 2y ago
> Then there was me, the only Europoorean at the table, and I put my regular card with a picture of a small kitten on the plate. The waiter complimented me on my card with a smile and I kinda cherish that. American flexes are weird to me, lol. A true German would have put down cash, and seen that as a flex perhaps. (Or at least would have done so in the past. I haven't lived there in a while.) Doing something out-of-context also reminds me how the English put each other firmly into their class system by their accents. So how / where you grew up will follow you around your whole life and colour your interactions. However, if you come in with a foreign accent--say German-- that overrides this clue, so it's easier for you to interact with both working class and upper class people with less weirdness than the natives have to endure.
- shermantanktop 2y ago
  Kitten? To me that’s an exquisite reverse flex. “I see your ostentatious displays of status, and I counter with: a picture of something worth caring about.”
- n_ary 2y ago
  > A true German would have put down cash, and seen that as a flex perhaps. (Or at least would have done so in the past. I haven't lived there in a while.) Things had changed quite a bit here. Card usage is now a default everywhere(including those pesky shops that used to put a "cash-only" signs). Only hardcore grannies now use cash these days, but even I see a lot of oma/opa pulling out their Sparkasse cards at the counter.
  - eru 2y ago
    Thanks! I left the Vaterland in 2009, and I guess it shows how out-of-date I am. Even my sister says that my German has become old-fashioned.
- sva_ 2y ago
  Yeah I usually pay cash everywhere but I found Americans get nervous (and may think you're a criminal) if you pay bills north of $100 in cash.
542354234235 2y ago
This doesn't seem like a flex situation, as the Gold and Platinum aren't difficult to get and are extremely common. The gold in particular earns a large bonus on restaurant spending so I always pay with that, and it never crossed my mind that anyone would be impressed. As for why, for me and a lot of people, it is the points/cash back. Since European fees are capped, there isn't much opportunity for credit cards to bribe customers with perks. I make about 4% back on my credit card spending and pay off my balance every month, so no interest payments. I imagine people living in NYC are probably making 6 figure incomes, so the amount of points/cashback would be a lot more than the annual fees. Then of course you also get lounge/hotel/ etc. benefits.

by sva_ 2y ago

addicted 2y ago

I’m not sure what part you were confused about. Splitting charges is very common in the U.S. and has little to do with flexing your credit cards.

sva_ 2y ago
I suppose, but we were two couples. I usually pay for my gf, and in the case of a double-date, the other guy usually pays for his gf/wife. I don't have the impression that splitting charges is more common in the US than the gentleman paying for his date. But I guess it does happen. Sometimes my GF insists on paying to even it out a little though.
- kubectl_h 2y ago
  Two couples = two cards (at most) in my experience. Some people are really particular about bills though. Did you split evenly or itemize the bills?
- danielhep 2y ago
  At least in my circles, unless it's like a first date, everyone is paying for their own meals. My girlfriend and I put receipts on the fridge and then reconcile them every so often.
deleted 2y ago
[deleted]

tehnub 2y ago

It could also be that they wanted the cash-back or rewards they get on those fancy cards.

xarope 2y ago

> card with a picture of a small kitten and now I want to know which card...!

t0mas88 2y ago
ING bank lets you design your own card. Upload a picture and they print it.

eru 2y ago

> Then there was me, the only Europoorean at the table, and I put my regular card with a picture of a small kitten on the plate. The waiter complimented me on my card with a smile and I kinda cherish that. American flexes are weird to me, lol. A true German would have put down cash, and seen that as a flex perhaps. (Or at least would have done so in the past. I haven't lived there in a while.) Doing something out-of-context also reminds me how the English put each other firmly into their class system by their accents. So how / where you grew up will follow you around your whole life and colour your interactions. However, if you come in with a foreign accent--say German-- that overrides this clue, so it's easier for you to interact with both working class and upper class people with less weirdness than the natives have to endure.

shermantanktop 2y ago
Kitten? To me that’s an exquisite reverse flex. “I see your ostentatious displays of status, and I counter with: a picture of something worth caring about.”
n_ary 2y ago
> A true German would have put down cash, and seen that as a flex perhaps. (Or at least would have done so in the past. I haven't lived there in a while.) Things had changed quite a bit here. Card usage is now a default everywhere(including those pesky shops that used to put a "cash-only" signs). Only hardcore grannies now use cash these days, but even I see a lot of oma/opa pulling out their Sparkasse cards at the counter.
- eru 2y ago
  Thanks! I left the Vaterland in 2009, and I guess it shows how out-of-date I am. Even my sister says that my German has become old-fashioned.
sva_ 2y ago
Yeah I usually pay cash everywhere but I found Americans get nervous (and may think you're a criminal) if you pay bills north of $100 in cash.

542354234235 2y ago

This doesn't seem like a flex situation, as the Gold and Platinum aren't difficult to get and are extremely common. The gold in particular earns a large bonus on restaurant spending so I always pay with that, and it never crossed my mind that anyone would be impressed. As for why, for me and a lot of people, it is the points/cash back. Since European fees are capped, there isn't much opportunity for credit cards to bribe customers with perks. I make about 4% back on my credit card spending and pay off my balance every month, so no interest payments. I imagine people living in NYC are probably making 6 figure incomes, so the amount of points/cashback would be a lot more than the annual fees. Then of course you also get lounge/hotel/ etc. benefits.