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I've worked worked through the issues in a couple of "brilliant jerks" in my career. Although really none of them were jerks, in both instances just frustrated
by neom 2y ago
I've worked worked through the issues in a couple of "brilliant jerks" in my career. Although really none of them were jerks, in both instances just frustrated humans who cared a lot about the work they're doing and nobody had taken the (hours) to fully work through what was going on. With one of them, we worked through stuff for 4 sessions over 2 weeks and by the end got to some version of "wait, so that's it, there is nothing more to it than that, it's just that's the way it is?" and once that acceptance came, the frustration was resolved and the situation was fully understood the homie inside re-emerged.
- theideaofcoffee 2y agoThis has been my experience as well, it boils down to them mostly being unheard, which causes frustration which can manifest itself as us-vs-them. Taking the time and hearing them out, and like you did, just working with them and hearing them helps a ton. I can count the number of actual jerks I’ve crossed paths with in my career on less than four fingers over nearly 20 years. The other “jerks” just need a little peace, love and understanding.
- TonyAlicea10 2y agoI’m not really referring to particular situations, but consistent behaviors that manifest across many interactions under many contexts. I too think that real jerkish behavior is rare, versus needing to apply soft skills to a person who has a need that isn’t being met. But when a real one is in a team, I think it’s a serious enough event to warrant consideration of the topic.