American culture is so doggedly hostile to friendships and really, any casual social interaction, that it's the least fucking surprising thing in the world that

American culture is so doggedly hostile to friendships and really, any casual social interaction, that it's the least fucking surprising thing in the world that tons of us struggle to maintain relationships. For starters: work. Most of us work, at minimum, 8 hours per day, 5 days per week. Most of us have an hour lunch in there, so that's 9. The average commute is just shy of half an hour one direction, so let's round that up to 10. We're already at 42% utilization for 5/7 of your average days, or 30% of the entire week, and I emphasize: this is the minimum. Many people have WAY more than this, both commute and work hours, voluntarily or by necessity. Statistically: you spend 3 out of every 10 of your hours alive either going to, being at, or returning from work. If you're a healthy person you're getting ballpark 6-8 hours of sleep per night, we'll say 7 to make the math easier. So on the work days, before you do a SINGLE THING for yourself, that's 17 hours of your day already accounted for leaving you a measly 7. A full 50% of your theoretical week is gone already. We have not even approached the subject of child-rearing, which if you have that in your life, that remaining 7 might as well be fucking zero. Any time you don't spend at work will statistically almost certainly involve if not be entirely centered on your child. Add in the obligations you have to your spouse, the absolute ton of things any regular old person is responsible for to constitute and maintain a "normal life" in our modern era (bills need paying, appointments need making and attending, cars need oil changes, lawns need mowing, the wife really wants that new shelf hung in the closet, did you do your taxes yet, what do you mean you forgot the groceries in the car, there was milk in there) and like.. where the hell do friends go here? I'd like to note here, I am privileged as FUCK on this issue. I work from home, so no commute, apart from the odd business trip. I'm adamantly child-free, I have an extremely flexible and trusting employer that I love to work for who lets me slack off the schedule basically at my convenience to get appointments done, run errands, resolve family emergencies, or just have lunch with people. And despite that straight flush of "I have this the easiest I can have it" I STILL struggle to find time to fit in all the just miscellaneous bullshit that it's my responsibility to get done, and, since all my friends (of which I have about four give or take in my immediate area) DON'T have that straight flush, scheduling things with them is also a nightmare and often results in cancelled plans because people are fucking exhausted, overworked, underpaid and stressed the shit out. I don't understand how anyone is surprised at this. We have optimized every ounce of slack out of our lives, there is ALWAYS something that needs doing. Never mind that I have no places to make friends or meet people, never mind that I haven't really made a new one since school that wasn't connected to another: WHEN. When the fuck am I meant to fill my proverbial social bar. And, for that matter, there is NOWHERE I can go right now to even try, that won't cost be money to do.