No need to fly over to the Vatican, if you pop round my gaff I charge a small fee for Knighthoods and Sainthoods. I bought an old sword from a car boot sale, I

No need to fly over to the Vatican, if you pop round my gaff I charge a small fee for Knighthoods and Sainthoods. I bought an old sword from a car boot sale, I've cleaned it up so its nice a shiny. I use that for the dubbing. I provide a free cup of tea and biscuits. The certificate will be sent in the post via Royal Mail signed for mail.