3 ms·

I think people are projecting a lot of class stuff onto this which is besides the point. I still think it is completely normal to figure out who your close cow

I think people are projecting a lot of class stuff onto this which is besides the point. I still think it is completely normal to figure out who your close coworkers are and settle into a group after a few days. I think it is more about organizational structure and immediacy than anything else, unless someone is actively rejecting a greeting. I work in a department of 100, and have met just about everyone. It would be extremely weird, not to mention distracting to say high to everyone when I walk to my desk. I don't think I am an outlier in that I prioritize greeting in this setting. Yes, that means I'm probably not going to single out some intern that I worked with for a couple days. I don't think that makes me a psychopath, and it doesn't mean I wouldn't chat with them in an elevator or some similar 1:1 circumstance.

lukan 2y ago
Meeting someone is something different from receiving a personal training on the first day, which was 2 days ago at the point of the story.
throwup238 2y ago
> It would be extremely weird, not to mention distracting to say high to everyone when I walk to my desk. All you have to do is attempt to make eye contact and smile.
- zeroonetwothree 2y ago
  That’s not easy for everyone
  - lukan 2y ago
    True, but we are not talking about developers on the spectrum, but traders, who are usually more social by nature.
    - bluefirebrand 2y ago
      If developers are on the spectrum then traders are sociopaths, no?
- sublinear 2y ago
  I'm pretty sure nobody cares about receiving a smile unless they're the socially awkward ones or are there for the wrong reasons (narcissists). High quality work and facilitating the same in others is a far more courteous gesture than any awkward smiles.
  - throwup238 2y ago
    > I'm pretty sure nobody cares about receiving a smile unless they're the socially awkward ones or are there for the wrong reasons (narcissists). Are you autistic? The vast majority of people appreciate a little eye contact and a smile which is literally the least you can do to acknowledge that they're human and not a piece of furniture.
    - sublinear 2y ago
      Would you feel appreciated by a coworker who does sloppy work that you have to pick up slack for, yet smiles at you every morning? Didn't think so. It would likely make it worse in some ways, wouldn't it? You might feel pity and guilt, not happiness. But I think most would still try to work with them to improve in good faith because that's work. The smile is irrelevant. The happiness comes when you've helped train them up. Then the smile actually means something. On the flip side, would you feel appreciated or intimidated by a coworker who smiles at you yet carries all that soft power of deep knowledge and skills nobody else at that workplace has? Smiles can mean a lot more than shallow acknowledgement especially in the workplace. At a social gathering though, sure the smile is just friendly.
      - throwup238 2y ago
        > Would you feel appreciated by a coworker who does sloppy work that you have to pick up slack for, yet smiles at you every morning? Didn't think so. It would likely make it worse in some ways, wouldn't it? You might feel pity and guilt, not happiness. >But I think most would still try to work with them to improve in good faith because that's work. The smile is irrelevant. The OP mentioned walking past a hundred peoples' desks. Do you really need to feel appreciated by a hundred random coworkers to act like a decent human being?
detourdog 2y ago
Also trading floors are intense and require focus.

lukan 2y ago

Meeting someone is something different from receiving a personal training on the first day, which was 2 days ago at the point of the story.

throwup238 2y ago

> It would be extremely weird, not to mention distracting to say high to everyone when I walk to my desk. All you have to do is attempt to make eye contact and smile.

zeroonetwothree 2y ago
That’s not easy for everyone
- lukan 2y ago
  True, but we are not talking about developers on the spectrum, but traders, who are usually more social by nature.
  - bluefirebrand 2y ago
    If developers are on the spectrum then traders are sociopaths, no?
sublinear 2y ago
I'm pretty sure nobody cares about receiving a smile unless they're the socially awkward ones or are there for the wrong reasons (narcissists). High quality work and facilitating the same in others is a far more courteous gesture than any awkward smiles.
- throwup238 2y ago
  > I'm pretty sure nobody cares about receiving a smile unless they're the socially awkward ones or are there for the wrong reasons (narcissists). Are you autistic? The vast majority of people appreciate a little eye contact and a smile which is literally the least you can do to acknowledge that they're human and not a piece of furniture.
  - sublinear 2y ago
    Would you feel appreciated by a coworker who does sloppy work that you have to pick up slack for, yet smiles at you every morning? Didn't think so. It would likely make it worse in some ways, wouldn't it? You might feel pity and guilt, not happiness. But I think most would still try to work with them to improve in good faith because that's work. The smile is irrelevant. The happiness comes when you've helped train them up. Then the smile actually means something. On the flip side, would you feel appreciated or intimidated by a coworker who smiles at you yet carries all that soft power of deep knowledge and skills nobody else at that workplace has? Smiles can mean a lot more than shallow acknowledgement especially in the workplace. At a social gathering though, sure the smile is just friendly.
    - throwup238 2y ago
      > Would you feel appreciated by a coworker who does sloppy work that you have to pick up slack for, yet smiles at you every morning? Didn't think so. It would likely make it worse in some ways, wouldn't it? You might feel pity and guilt, not happiness. >But I think most would still try to work with them to improve in good faith because that's work. The smile is irrelevant. The OP mentioned walking past a hundred peoples' desks. Do you really need to feel appreciated by a hundred random coworkers to act like a decent human being?

detourdog 2y ago

Also trading floors are intense and require focus.