The primary negative effect I felt as a gay man came from the preacher, who felt the need to respond to news about LGBTQIA topics and remind the congregation th

The primary negative effect I felt as a gay man came from the preacher, who felt the need to respond to news about LGBTQIA topics and remind the congregation that I basically wasn't allowed to exist. I had to hide this aspect of myself and pretend to be straight so my Dad (a teacher and a youth minister, in an era where I wasn't legally allowed to exist either) wouldn't lose his job. Once I was able to leave home, and the law was adjusted, and I finally called my Dad to tell him I had my first real crush and was about to ask someone out, he was nothing but supportive and a great weight was lifted. Finally, I didn't have to lie to everyone I knew all the time. I could just be honest. At no time during any of that was I ever truly straight. But I've learned to wear that mask when required. My aspect didn't cause me to take up drugs, or sleep around, or stay in abusive relationships just because I'd finally found the right orientation in a partner. Indeed, I'm currently single and pursuing a career in computer science, because that's a bit more interesting. The only thing "coming out" changed was allowing me to stop lying all the time. I was just able to finally be me. That's it. That's all I ever wanted: to stop pretending to be something I'm not.