2 ms·

Good point, which really ties back to 6 though. A lot of the people that complain about constantly being interrupted seem to ramble on incessantly and never all

by carlmr 2y ago

Good point, which really ties back to 6 though. A lot of the people that complain about constantly being interrupted seem to ramble on incessantly and never allow anybody else to speak. For a good conversation there needs to be a balance here.

e40 2y ago
Agreed. I have found that people who talk too much are afraid of what others have to say and don’t want to hear it. Also, many of them are control freaks.
bityard 2y ago
You may be right. But in my case, I can tell you for certain that I do not ramble. Not at work, anyway. (Unless you ask me about my hobbies.) I actually tend not to talk much at all because I'm not one of those people who talks just to "be social," or to fill in silence, or to give the appearance of being involved in the conversation. As a rule, I only speak up in meetings when I have something that's actually worth the effort of bringing up. What I do, however, is talk a bit slower than my peers because my brain seems to process my speech differently from how everyone else seems to process theirs. Most people can just say whatever is on their mind with no delay or hesitation, with perfect grammar and factual accuracy. I am not like that. I have to write (and edit!) the full sentences out in my head ahead of time and then recite them--as if reading off note cards--instead of letting my brain go on autopilot and say whatever it wants. Otherwise the things I say will turn out to be... let's just say, less than coherent. And it gets far, FAR worse when I'm struggling with insomnia, which is often. So when someone interrupts me in a meeting, after I recover from the rudeness I have to either stop and re-work everything I was going to say to address what they just said (which was very possibly going to be answered in the second part of the sentence they interrupted), or I just shut up altogether under the assumption that the group doesn't actually care enough about my thoughts on the matter to actually listen to them.
- carlmr 2y ago
  I'm sorry if I came across implying this is the case for you. It was more of an observation that the reverse may happen. If you're rather reserved it might be that people are trying to fill in the pause, because it makes them uncomfortable, but actually interrupting you. I'm not sure what to do about that. Maybe some non-verbal cues that you're not done might help, like using your hands to illustrate your point, and not lowering them during the pause.

by carlmr 2y ago

e40 2y ago

Agreed. I have found that people who talk too much are afraid of what others have to say and don’t want to hear it. Also, many of them are control freaks.

bityard 2y ago

You may be right. But in my case, I can tell you for certain that I do not ramble. Not at work, anyway. (Unless you ask me about my hobbies.) I actually tend not to talk much at all because I'm not one of those people who talks just to "be social," or to fill in silence, or to give the appearance of being involved in the conversation. As a rule, I only speak up in meetings when I have something that's actually worth the effort of bringing up. What I do, however, is talk a bit slower than my peers because my brain seems to process my speech differently from how everyone else seems to process theirs. Most people can just say whatever is on their mind with no delay or hesitation, with perfect grammar and factual accuracy. I am not like that. I have to write (and edit!) the full sentences out in my head ahead of time and then recite them--as if reading off note cards--instead of letting my brain go on autopilot and say whatever it wants. Otherwise the things I say will turn out to be... let's just say, less than coherent. And it gets far, FAR worse when I'm struggling with insomnia, which is often. So when someone interrupts me in a meeting, after I recover from the rudeness I have to either stop and re-work everything I was going to say to address what they just said (which was very possibly going to be answered in the second part of the sentence they interrupted), or I just shut up altogether under the assumption that the group doesn't actually care enough about my thoughts on the matter to actually listen to them.

carlmr 2y ago
I'm sorry if I came across implying this is the case for you. It was more of an observation that the reverse may happen. If you're rather reserved it might be that people are trying to fill in the pause, because it makes them uncomfortable, but actually interrupting you. I'm not sure what to do about that. Maybe some non-verbal cues that you're not done might help, like using your hands to illustrate your point, and not lowering them during the pause.