4 ms·

Startup CEOs, stop acting like victims.

57 points by kristinatastic 14y ago

zitterbewegung 14y ago
Yea, stop acting like you have a high stress job and large uncertainty about if you will be successful. Ignore the fact that most startups fail.
- tokenizer 14y ago
  I agree. People put stress onto themselves, and my first failure was because I didn't prepare enough financially so I'd like to add to your point and say any financial uncertainty is because you didn't prepare for it. "It's better to be prepared and not have an opportunity than to be given one and not be prepared." - My grandfather
  - il 14y ago
    I don't understand your point. If you're preparing for an opportunity that never comes, that preparation is wasted. Better to find as many opportunities to succeed as you can and try to seize them when they present themselves, even if you're not 100% ready. For example, we are currently in a fantastic economic environment to found a startup. Raising money, recruiting talent, finding partners,etc is easier than ever before(at least in startup hotspots). People who are working on a project on the side part time and are waiting to take the leap into a startup until they're more prepared will likely miss out on the opportunity and will regret it later.
    - meric 14y ago
      One set of preparation can be good for more than one opportunity. E.g. Saving up $100k, which can be used for the following opportunities: Housing crisis, stock crash, initial investment in a startup, travel. It can also be used for the following unfavourable circumstances: sickness, accident, personal reason for travelling. A more narrow form of preparation could be learning a skill, e.g. programming, which sets you up for possible startup ventures as well as a full-time job. He's not saying that you shouldn't try to seize opportunities when you may not be fully prepared; He's saying when opportunities are available, you will be more able to seize it if you're more prepared.
- siberianfruit 14y ago
  Hmm... My point is that there's a notion of startup CEOs and founders as martyrs. I want to take responsibility for my life, and build it the way I want it. I'm not a victim of my startup.
sudonim 14y ago
I've been a startup CEO full time for oh, about 2 months now. It has been the most phenomenal, educational experience of my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I skimmed the quora post, and boy... that guy's life sounds horrible. I sleep well most nights, but I stress on others. The pressure is on since we've taken money and don't yet earn enough to curb the burn. I also have this belief (crazy?) that we're doing something awesome, and have the background to accomplish it. I've always felt that I (+ my cofounder) have the agency to be in control of our destiny. I've never been more responsible for the outcome of things than I am today. I'm guessing that the people who don't sleep well are (too far) out of their depth and the weight of their impending doom unless they figure it out is crushing. As the CEO, I've taken on the bulk of the shit work - like administrative stuff - getting a lawyer, accountant, bookkeeper, bank account (the list goes on). I spend less time than I'd like on the product. Maybe 10-15 hours a week in the code / learning. A lot of time emailing, organizing meetings and phone calls. Overall though, it's fun and rewarding work. We are building something that doesn't exist in the world and providing it to other people in exchange for money. How cool is that!
- tokenizer 14y ago
  You made me somewhat rethink my goals of fun being my top priority for projects. Now I have no idea as to whether I would continue working on something if it got big and i had to worry about legal and administrative issues. I'm sure every experience starts different, but I would trade this off as soon as possible if I had to. Work on the stuff you want to work on! I hope you can soon! Cheers
  - sudonim 14y ago
    Fun is what gets me out of bed in the morning. Every day at work is a joy and brings new challenges. A project getting big is an awesome problem to have. The ideal project in my mind is one that is fun for you and solves a real need for someone else. You'll be able to figure out the legal and admin stuff as it pops up. So don't let that discourage you. My contact info is in my profile. If you have questions about the admin stuff with setting up a company, I (or I'm sure many other HNers) would be happy to help.
tokenizer 14y ago
I personally think that it's good for people to warn others about hardships, which the Quora answer could have been. But I also think that complaining about something completely in your control, or something you started is silly. If you're the CEO and you don't like your schedule or your daily routine, then change it. I may not have created anything of importance yet, but my goal is to do something on the side and part time while working, have fun with it, and stay true to to the fun point the entire time. When something you put on yourself stops being fun, you need to start asking questions. Cheers
- jandrewrogers 14y ago
  Most people interpret the job of CEO backward. When you are a CEO with employees, investors, etc your job is to balance the needs and wants of all those people ahead of whatever you might want. It is really the exact opposite of being a dictator. You can change your schedule if you do not like it only to the extent it does not significantly impact everyone else associated with the company.
tomstokes 14y ago
From my experience, this notion of martyrdom is only common among startup CEOs at companies that haven't yet gain traction or found their own success. Self-validation is easy to come by when your company is a success. When things aren't going well, it's much easier to justify if you can convince yourself (and others) that you're working on it as hard as you can. The idea is that more work now == more success later. The martyr CEO who sacrifices every weekend and never sleeps a full eight hours is the extreme example of putting in more work. And until the company actually achieves success, the long hours of work are all the CEO really has to show other people (and themselves) that their company is worthwhile.
deleted 14y ago
[deleted]
firefoxman1 14y ago
"If anyone is unhappy, remember that his unhappiness is his own fault... Nothing else is the cause of anxiety or loss of tranquility except our own opinion." - Epictetus
- wpietri 14y ago
  He has a point. But clearly Epictetus did not have party-all-night upstairs neighbors with bad taste in music. Just sayin'.
  - djt 14y ago
    Epictetus was born into slavery, was lame, became a free man somehow, presumably from studying philosophy, then was banned from Rome for being a philosopher. I'd say he argues the same point as this article in that he was happy regardless of the circumstances of his life.
    - mark_integerdsv 14y ago
      Yes but did he have to endure The Black Eyed Peas?
nickler 14y ago
I think the point of the original article was missed, but you still make a great point about the empowering/inspiring side of the process. As someone who has advised hundreds of small business owners, the gritty, hard reality is exactly what most of them need to be educated about. Most startups fail because founders are unprepared, underfunded, and have a tremendous optimism about what they can accomplish. They fail because they're 'super inspired' and 'totally passionate' and 'serial entrepreneurs'. They fail because they're not losing sleep over how well they execute their sales funnel. Don't get me wrong, my favorite line in startups is that 'optimism builds companies, pessimism keeps them operating'. You need both to make it long term. I didn't sense an ounce of complaining, martyrdom, or bitching in the article, just a welcome glimpse into a world that most observers glorify as a real life version of 'the social network'. More people need to see it, especially as we're in the era of celebrating entrepreneurs. The ones that succeed are the one's fighting for every inch, every customer, and every success. If you're not, someone smarter, hungrier, and better funded is coming for your customers. Finding a zen and a calm perspective is what the best leaders do to combat the anxiety and stress of solving big problems in global markets. Once again I totally appreciate your take, I think it's bang on, just as the other is. You need both to make it....
- rmATinnovafy 14y ago
  They fail because they're not losing sleep over how well they execute their sales funnel. As someone who is losing sleep over the same issue, I appreaciate the fact that you understand it. I never get why so many startups focus on the minor things when the sales funnel is the most important part of the deal. Seems like people are just doing startups because its IN. Not because they want to build a profitable business.
vnorby 14y ago
The reason that post has so many upvotes is because what he is describing is real, mental suffering and fatigue that most (not all, I guess) startup founders accrue. The end result of doing a startup is personal learning, growth, having had the opportunity to work with smart people, etc., but during the process you will forget those things because there are other things on your mind - at least I do. I don't think any founder would take their role for granted or change their position with anyone else - but when you are in the hot seat and you feel the weight of so many people on your shoulders to do well by them and for them, there are days where you wonder if you should just go work for someone else and let them make the decisions for you. I would venture that the worst feeling in the world is one of being trapped and not knowing what to do. When you are a startup founder, you are trapped all the time, and constantly between rocks and hard places. You need to learn everything but you don't know what exactly. You need to improve growth, improve product, improve retention, improve revenue, improve profitability, but you don't know how sometimes and you don't know who to ask, and a lot of the time you don't even know how to measure success when it does happen until well after the fact. Being a founder is not like anything else in the world, because it's the one societal role where up until you actually accomplish and build something of value and sustain it for a long period of time, there's nobody but your parents to say how proud they are of you.
- bootload 14y ago
  "... The reason that post has so many upvotes is because what ^he^ is describing is real, mental suffering and fatigue that most (not all, I guess) startup founders accrue. ..." He is a she, Deena Varshavskaya ~ https://twitter.com/#!/siberianfruit https://twitter.com/#!/siberianfruit
  - shortformblog 14y ago
    The "he" is the guy who answered the Quora question that Deena's responding to: http://www.quora.com/Startups/What-does-it-feel-like-to-be-the-CEO-of-a-start-up http://www.quora.com/Startups/What-does-it-feel-like-to-be-t...
    - 14y ago
ktrgardiner 14y ago
As The Eagles said in Hotel California: "We are all just prisoners here of our own device."
- siberianfruit 14y ago
  yep yep :)
djt 14y ago
The truth is that there is an observation bias at play where people that are negative about experiences go to do that and people that are positive go to other places to do that. The truth is that as CEO the buck stops with you, for good or bad. How you choose to experience that is a whole other story. I for one find it more empowering to take this view that you are in control as CEO and to be accountable for your actions. I know that doing this is hard, but it is no different to everything else where you have to be the best of the best. Blackbelt in martial arts, number 1 hit in the music charts, award winning tattooist, academy award winning movie director. It's all hard work and you never know how hard until you DO it. The closest thing I can think of to it is probably having a baby: does it change your life? Is it harder/different than you thought? would you do it again anyway? If you answer no to any of these then you will probably make a bad parent/CEO :)
sakura_k 14y ago
People are fascinated by the trials and tribulations of startup CEOs to the point of romanticism. It's certainly an ambitious and stressful job, but so are the jobs of all the people who are deeply invested in the companies those CEOs run. A bit of human balance goes a long way to creating a culture for long-term success.
ScotterC 14y ago
Hey buddy. Try this for a couple years. That post is dead on.

Yea, stop acting like you have a high stress job and large uncertainty about if you will be successful. Ignore the fact that most startups fail.

tokenizer 14y ago
I agree. People put stress onto themselves, and my first failure was because I didn't prepare enough financially so I'd like to add to your point and say any financial uncertainty is because you didn't prepare for it. "It's better to be prepared and not have an opportunity than to be given one and not be prepared." - My grandfather
- il 14y ago
  I don't understand your point. If you're preparing for an opportunity that never comes, that preparation is wasted. Better to find as many opportunities to succeed as you can and try to seize them when they present themselves, even if you're not 100% ready. For example, we are currently in a fantastic economic environment to found a startup. Raising money, recruiting talent, finding partners,etc is easier than ever before(at least in startup hotspots). People who are working on a project on the side part time and are waiting to take the leap into a startup until they're more prepared will likely miss out on the opportunity and will regret it later.
  - meric 14y ago
    One set of preparation can be good for more than one opportunity. E.g. Saving up $100k, which can be used for the following opportunities: Housing crisis, stock crash, initial investment in a startup, travel. It can also be used for the following unfavourable circumstances: sickness, accident, personal reason for travelling. A more narrow form of preparation could be learning a skill, e.g. programming, which sets you up for possible startup ventures as well as a full-time job. He's not saying that you shouldn't try to seize opportunities when you may not be fully prepared; He's saying when opportunities are available, you will be more able to seize it if you're more prepared.
siberianfruit 14y ago
Hmm... My point is that there's a notion of startup CEOs and founders as martyrs. I want to take responsibility for my life, and build it the way I want it. I'm not a victim of my startup.

sudonim 14y ago

I've been a startup CEO full time for oh, about 2 months now. It has been the most phenomenal, educational experience of my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I skimmed the quora post, and boy... that guy's life sounds horrible. I sleep well most nights, but I stress on others. The pressure is on since we've taken money and don't yet earn enough to curb the burn. I also have this belief (crazy?) that we're doing something awesome, and have the background to accomplish it. I've always felt that I (+ my cofounder) have the agency to be in control of our destiny. I've never been more responsible for the outcome of things than I am today. I'm guessing that the people who don't sleep well are (too far) out of their depth and the weight of their impending doom unless they figure it out is crushing. As the CEO, I've taken on the bulk of the shit work - like administrative stuff - getting a lawyer, accountant, bookkeeper, bank account (the list goes on). I spend less time than I'd like on the product. Maybe 10-15 hours a week in the code / learning. A lot of time emailing, organizing meetings and phone calls. Overall though, it's fun and rewarding work. We are building something that doesn't exist in the world and providing it to other people in exchange for money. How cool is that!

tokenizer 14y ago
You made me somewhat rethink my goals of fun being my top priority for projects. Now I have no idea as to whether I would continue working on something if it got big and i had to worry about legal and administrative issues. I'm sure every experience starts different, but I would trade this off as soon as possible if I had to. Work on the stuff you want to work on! I hope you can soon! Cheers
- sudonim 14y ago
  Fun is what gets me out of bed in the morning. Every day at work is a joy and brings new challenges. A project getting big is an awesome problem to have. The ideal project in my mind is one that is fun for you and solves a real need for someone else. You'll be able to figure out the legal and admin stuff as it pops up. So don't let that discourage you. My contact info is in my profile. If you have questions about the admin stuff with setting up a company, I (or I'm sure many other HNers) would be happy to help.

tokenizer 14y ago

I personally think that it's good for people to warn others about hardships, which the Quora answer could have been. But I also think that complaining about something completely in your control, or something you started is silly. If you're the CEO and you don't like your schedule or your daily routine, then change it. I may not have created anything of importance yet, but my goal is to do something on the side and part time while working, have fun with it, and stay true to to the fun point the entire time. When something you put on yourself stops being fun, you need to start asking questions. Cheers

jandrewrogers 14y ago
Most people interpret the job of CEO backward. When you are a CEO with employees, investors, etc your job is to balance the needs and wants of all those people ahead of whatever you might want. It is really the exact opposite of being a dictator. You can change your schedule if you do not like it only to the extent it does not significantly impact everyone else associated with the company.

tomstokes 14y ago

From my experience, this notion of martyrdom is only common among startup CEOs at companies that haven't yet gain traction or found their own success. Self-validation is easy to come by when your company is a success. When things aren't going well, it's much easier to justify if you can convince yourself (and others) that you're working on it as hard as you can. The idea is that more work now == more success later. The martyr CEO who sacrifices every weekend and never sleeps a full eight hours is the extreme example of putting in more work. And until the company actually achieves success, the long hours of work are all the CEO really has to show other people (and themselves) that their company is worthwhile.

deleted 14y ago

[deleted]

firefoxman1 14y ago

"If anyone is unhappy, remember that his unhappiness is his own fault... Nothing else is the cause of anxiety or loss of tranquility except our own opinion." - Epictetus

wpietri 14y ago
He has a point. But clearly Epictetus did not have party-all-night upstairs neighbors with bad taste in music. Just sayin'.
- djt 14y ago
  Epictetus was born into slavery, was lame, became a free man somehow, presumably from studying philosophy, then was banned from Rome for being a philosopher. I'd say he argues the same point as this article in that he was happy regardless of the circumstances of his life.
  - mark_integerdsv 14y ago
    Yes but did he have to endure The Black Eyed Peas?

nickler 14y ago

I think the point of the original article was missed, but you still make a great point about the empowering/inspiring side of the process. As someone who has advised hundreds of small business owners, the gritty, hard reality is exactly what most of them need to be educated about. Most startups fail because founders are unprepared, underfunded, and have a tremendous optimism about what they can accomplish. They fail because they're 'super inspired' and 'totally passionate' and 'serial entrepreneurs'. They fail because they're not losing sleep over how well they execute their sales funnel. Don't get me wrong, my favorite line in startups is that 'optimism builds companies, pessimism keeps them operating'. You need both to make it long term. I didn't sense an ounce of complaining, martyrdom, or bitching in the article, just a welcome glimpse into a world that most observers glorify as a real life version of 'the social network'. More people need to see it, especially as we're in the era of celebrating entrepreneurs. The ones that succeed are the one's fighting for every inch, every customer, and every success. If you're not, someone smarter, hungrier, and better funded is coming for your customers. Finding a zen and a calm perspective is what the best leaders do to combat the anxiety and stress of solving big problems in global markets. Once again I totally appreciate your take, I think it's bang on, just as the other is. You need both to make it....

rmATinnovafy 14y ago
They fail because they're not losing sleep over how well they execute their sales funnel. As someone who is losing sleep over the same issue, I appreaciate the fact that you understand it. I never get why so many startups focus on the minor things when the sales funnel is the most important part of the deal. Seems like people are just doing startups because its IN. Not because they want to build a profitable business.

vnorby 14y ago

The reason that post has so many upvotes is because what he is describing is real, mental suffering and fatigue that most (not all, I guess) startup founders accrue. The end result of doing a startup is personal learning, growth, having had the opportunity to work with smart people, etc., but during the process you will forget those things because there are other things on your mind - at least I do. I don't think any founder would take their role for granted or change their position with anyone else - but when you are in the hot seat and you feel the weight of so many people on your shoulders to do well by them and for them, there are days where you wonder if you should just go work for someone else and let them make the decisions for you. I would venture that the worst feeling in the world is one of being trapped and not knowing what to do. When you are a startup founder, you are trapped all the time, and constantly between rocks and hard places. You need to learn everything but you don't know what exactly. You need to improve growth, improve product, improve retention, improve revenue, improve profitability, but you don't know how sometimes and you don't know who to ask, and a lot of the time you don't even know how to measure success when it does happen until well after the fact. Being a founder is not like anything else in the world, because it's the one societal role where up until you actually accomplish and build something of value and sustain it for a long period of time, there's nobody but your parents to say how proud they are of you.

bootload 14y ago
"... The reason that post has so many upvotes is because what ^he^ is describing is real, mental suffering and fatigue that most (not all, I guess) startup founders accrue. ..." He is a she, Deena Varshavskaya ~ https://twitter.com/#!/siberianfruit https://twitter.com/#!/siberianfruit
- shortformblog 14y ago
  The "he" is the guy who answered the Quora question that Deena's responding to: http://www.quora.com/Startups/What-does-it-feel-like-to-be-the-CEO-of-a-start-up http://www.quora.com/Startups/What-does-it-feel-like-to-be-t...
  - 14y ago

ktrgardiner 14y ago

As The Eagles said in Hotel California: "We are all just prisoners here of our own device."

siberianfruit 14y ago
yep yep :)

djt 14y ago

The truth is that there is an observation bias at play where people that are negative about experiences go to do that and people that are positive go to other places to do that. The truth is that as CEO the buck stops with you, for good or bad. How you choose to experience that is a whole other story. I for one find it more empowering to take this view that you are in control as CEO and to be accountable for your actions. I know that doing this is hard, but it is no different to everything else where you have to be the best of the best. Blackbelt in martial arts, number 1 hit in the music charts, award winning tattooist, academy award winning movie director. It's all hard work and you never know how hard until you DO it. The closest thing I can think of to it is probably having a baby: does it change your life? Is it harder/different than you thought? would you do it again anyway? If you answer no to any of these then you will probably make a bad parent/CEO :)

sakura_k 14y ago

People are fascinated by the trials and tribulations of startup CEOs to the point of romanticism. It's certainly an ambitious and stressful job, but so are the jobs of all the people who are deeply invested in the companies those CEOs run. A bit of human balance goes a long way to creating a culture for long-term success.

ScotterC 14y ago

Hey buddy. Try this for a couple years. That post is dead on.