5 ms·

Anyone who sends them money is a fool and a coward. You made your bed, lie in it. Paying them won't make it go away. If this happens it is time to come clean wi

Anyone who sends them money is a fool and a coward. You made your bed, lie in it. Paying them won't make it go away. If this happens it is time to come clean with your spouse and tell the extortionist to piss off.

smt88 2y ago
They're already a coward for cheating on a spouse. I'm not sure why they'd suddenly grow a backbone, especially considering the severe legal consequences of cheating causing a divorce in most states.
- pmarreck 2y ago
  I still find it hilarious that people see a car with a design fault that is built into the brand which causes a lot of extra accidents, and blame the brand, but they see yet another marriage in trouble and blame the participants instead of the institution itself or perhaps the environment the institution is struggling to stay viable in
- UncleEntity 2y ago
  And after their spouse starts asking questions about where these multiple thousands of dollars are going?
  - dmitrygr 2y ago
    This is not as common as you'd think. I know a few couples where, only at divorce time did one find out that the other had placed them millions in debt.
- crazygringo 2y ago
  They might be some things for cheating on a spouse, but being a coward isn't one of them. Cowardice, or its opposite courage, are utterly unrelated to anything involving marital fidelity. I mean, it makes just as much sense to say they found the courage to cheat!
  - smt88 2y ago
    > Cowardice, or its opposite courage, are utterly unrelated to anything involving marital fidelity. Absolutely untrue. A brave person who is unhappy (or has unmet needs) in a marriage would talk to their spouse about it. If they couldn't fix the marriage, they'd ask for a divorce. It's much easier and less painful to violate the agreement of monogamy that you made. The fear of the pain of honesty and/or divorce is what makes people cheat rather than work on a marriage.
    - searealist 2y ago
      Your assumption that only men in unhappy marriages cheat is unfounded.
      - smt88 2y ago
        I also mentioned that cheaters may just feel something is missing. It's irrelevant whether they're happy or not. Violating an agreement you made with someone behind their back for your own selfish reasons is cowardly.
        searealist 2y ago
        Just because you find something immoral doesn't mean it's cowardly.
        smt88 2y ago
        It's also not an issue of morality. If you are too afraid of whatever consequences there are to be honest with someone and then violate your agreement with them, you made a selfish decision based on fear, which is the definition of cowardice.
        searealist 2y ago
        So, anyone who avoids consequences is a coward? Or is it just when you do something immoral and avoid consequences? Is it just when you "make a deal" and secretly violate it that makes you a coward? Was Ghengis Khan a coward then? He did a lot of immoral things. He violated a lot of deals. He avoided the consequences of both. Your redefinition of coward is ridiculous.
- brazzy 2y ago
  > the severe legal consequences of cheating causing a divorce in most states. Reality check: Most states have abolished fault divorces entirely, and in all of them the legal consequences of cheating as such are generally zero.
  - mlboss 2y ago
    But divorce is still very expensive, you still need to give alimony
  - smt88 2y ago
    A minority of Americans live in no-fault states, especially because New York still recognizes fault. Regardless, even a no-fault divorce is a devastating event for most people, even if only financially.

smt88 2y ago

They're already a coward for cheating on a spouse. I'm not sure why they'd suddenly grow a backbone, especially considering the severe legal consequences of cheating causing a divorce in most states.

pmarreck 2y ago
I still find it hilarious that people see a car with a design fault that is built into the brand which causes a lot of extra accidents, and blame the brand, but they see yet another marriage in trouble and blame the participants instead of the institution itself or perhaps the environment the institution is struggling to stay viable in
UncleEntity 2y ago
And after their spouse starts asking questions about where these multiple thousands of dollars are going?
- dmitrygr 2y ago
  This is not as common as you'd think. I know a few couples where, only at divorce time did one find out that the other had placed them millions in debt.
crazygringo 2y ago
They might be some things for cheating on a spouse, but being a coward isn't one of them. Cowardice, or its opposite courage, are utterly unrelated to anything involving marital fidelity. I mean, it makes just as much sense to say they found the courage to cheat!
- smt88 2y ago
  > Cowardice, or its opposite courage, are utterly unrelated to anything involving marital fidelity. Absolutely untrue. A brave person who is unhappy (or has unmet needs) in a marriage would talk to their spouse about it. If they couldn't fix the marriage, they'd ask for a divorce. It's much easier and less painful to violate the agreement of monogamy that you made. The fear of the pain of honesty and/or divorce is what makes people cheat rather than work on a marriage.
  - searealist 2y ago
    Your assumption that only men in unhappy marriages cheat is unfounded.
    - smt88 2y ago
      I also mentioned that cheaters may just feel something is missing. It's irrelevant whether they're happy or not. Violating an agreement you made with someone behind their back for your own selfish reasons is cowardly.
      - searealist 2y ago
        Just because you find something immoral doesn't mean it's cowardly.
        smt88 2y ago
        It's also not an issue of morality. If you are too afraid of whatever consequences there are to be honest with someone and then violate your agreement with them, you made a selfish decision based on fear, which is the definition of cowardice.
        searealist 2y ago
        So, anyone who avoids consequences is a coward? Or is it just when you do something immoral and avoid consequences? Is it just when you "make a deal" and secretly violate it that makes you a coward? Was Ghengis Khan a coward then? He did a lot of immoral things. He violated a lot of deals. He avoided the consequences of both. Your redefinition of coward is ridiculous.
brazzy 2y ago
> the severe legal consequences of cheating causing a divorce in most states. Reality check: Most states have abolished fault divorces entirely, and in all of them the legal consequences of cheating as such are generally zero.
- mlboss 2y ago
  But divorce is still very expensive, you still need to give alimony
- smt88 2y ago
  A minority of Americans live in no-fault states, especially because New York still recognizes fault. Regardless, even a no-fault divorce is a devastating event for most people, even if only financially.