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Absolutely don't tolerate abuse and set out your stall early on but I don't think the response is to fire the first volley, but to shutdown an abuser quickly.

by bobdvb 2y ago

Absolutely don't tolerate abuse and set out your stall early on but I don't think the response is to fire the first volley, but to shutdown an abuser quickly. "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind" is an old saying but very true and often forgotten. As a maintainer or moderator, swift action which shuts down antisocial behaviour is more important than engaging. Perhaps you didn't really mean to say "abuse the crap out of abusers", but the correct response isn't abuse, it's a simple denial of engagement. The other side of this is arrogant maintainers who have no interest in engaging with their audience and who don't accept criticism/comment. If you put it out there then you are asking for comment, if you just want to maintain your own code of your own purposes, then either don't make it open source or at least turn off issue tracking.

CRConrad 2y ago
> Absolutely don't tolerate abuse and set out your stall early on but I don't think the response is to fire the first volley, but to shutdown an abuser quickly. Well, by "abuse the crap out of abusers" I certainly didn't mean you should "fire the first volley". You can't know that someone is an abuser before they have fired the first volley. Then you fire the second one, to shut them down.
- Zancarius 2y ago
  No, I think bobdvb has a point, and mostly where I think I'm going with this is that abusers should just be shut down. In the context of FOSS, I think that means some combination of a) don't tolerate their attacks and b) shut them out. Whatever that might look like, basically it just deprives them of using your project as a platform to satisfy their perverse interests in making someone feel miserable. So, I'd rather not frame it as "abuse the abusers," because I think that risks escalating the situation. Five years ago I may have agreed with you, but a lot has changed in my life to recognize that it's just not worth the time trying to engage someone who enjoys being mean.

by bobdvb 2y ago

CRConrad 2y ago

> Absolutely don't tolerate abuse and set out your stall early on but I don't think the response is to fire the first volley, but to shutdown an abuser quickly. Well, by "abuse the crap out of abusers" I certainly didn't mean you should "fire the first volley". You can't know that someone is an abuser before they have fired the first volley. Then you fire the second one, to shut them down.

Zancarius 2y ago
No, I think bobdvb has a point, and mostly where I think I'm going with this is that abusers should just be shut down. In the context of FOSS, I think that means some combination of a) don't tolerate their attacks and b) shut them out. Whatever that might look like, basically it just deprives them of using your project as a platform to satisfy their perverse interests in making someone feel miserable. So, I'd rather not frame it as "abuse the abusers," because I think that risks escalating the situation. Five years ago I may have agreed with you, but a lot has changed in my life to recognize that it's just not worth the time trying to engage someone who enjoys being mean.