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I truly hope that in 15 years, when I am celebrating my 25 year anniversary, I wont lay awake at 4am and think about what I could have done better…

by _nhh 2y ago

jaggederest 2y ago
Oh you will. It'll be that time you passed on an early job at a company that went on to IPO, or the project that went sour despite your best efforts. It'll be a time you said the wrong thing to a colleague and damaged a friendship, or the time someone gave you good advice you ignored. You can't hold on to these things, but they'll bounce around your head sometimes, when life gets more challenging. That being said, it's also balanced by a lot of good memories. Not so often at this time of the night, the small hours, but nonetheless a fond memory will strike you now and then. The time when you came through clutch, or the project really went amazing even though everything went wrong, the time you helped an intern gain confidence and they went on to do amazing things. The small moments when you helped someone solve a problem and they returned the favor, that's what makes the job worth doing.
- vkou 2y ago
  If you're lying awake at 4am in the morning, I sure as hell hope it is over mistakes you've made in your personal life, not your professional one. In your obituary, when your life is tallied, nobody who matters is likely to give two figs about your work projects.
  - rimunroe 2y ago
    Maybe if I was in a more important profession with higher stakes I’d stay up at 4 AM thinking about those sorts of regrets, but I’m a software developer making B2B apps, not a trauma surgeon.
- rimunroe 2y ago
  > Oh you will. It'll be that time you passed on an early job at a company that went on to IPO, or the project that went sour despite your best efforts. I’m only a bit further into my career than the person you’re responding to, but this sounds truly depressing and (personally) incredibly unlikely. I’ve been in the situation where I was offered a spot at a company which later got acquired for a few billion dollars. I barely ever think about it, and when I do it’s simply as a “huh! Life is weird!” kinda thing. It’s not something that weighs on me and never has been. I really can’t emphasize enough how little of a regret it is. Maybe I’d feel differently if I was worried about becoming fabulously wealthy, but that’s always seemed like a fool’s errand to me. It’s much easier to be happy if you just aspire to have enough money to take care of yourself, your family, and at hopefully contribute to your community a bit. Totally agree on the interpersonal stuff though.
- pm215 2y ago
  I'm about 25 years in, and no, I don't have regrets about work stuff that I come back and think about. Partly I've been very lucky in how things have worked out, of course, but also work just isn't that big a deal in the grand scheme of things. I have a few wistful "wonder what it would have been like if I took the other fork in the road back then" thoughts sometimes, but they're not about work and career choices.

I truly hope that in 15 years, when I am celebrating my 25 year anniversary, I wont lay awake at 4am and think about what I could have done better…

by _nhh 2y ago

I truly hope that in 15 years, when I am celebrating my 25 year anniversary, I wont lay awake at 4am and think about what I could have done better…

jaggederest 2y ago

Oh you will. It'll be that time you passed on an early job at a company that went on to IPO, or the project that went sour despite your best efforts. It'll be a time you said the wrong thing to a colleague and damaged a friendship, or the time someone gave you good advice you ignored. You can't hold on to these things, but they'll bounce around your head sometimes, when life gets more challenging. That being said, it's also balanced by a lot of good memories. Not so often at this time of the night, the small hours, but nonetheless a fond memory will strike you now and then. The time when you came through clutch, or the project really went amazing even though everything went wrong, the time you helped an intern gain confidence and they went on to do amazing things. The small moments when you helped someone solve a problem and they returned the favor, that's what makes the job worth doing.

vkou 2y ago
If you're lying awake at 4am in the morning, I sure as hell hope it is over mistakes you've made in your personal life, not your professional one. In your obituary, when your life is tallied, nobody who matters is likely to give two figs about your work projects.
- rimunroe 2y ago
  Maybe if I was in a more important profession with higher stakes I’d stay up at 4 AM thinking about those sorts of regrets, but I’m a software developer making B2B apps, not a trauma surgeon.
rimunroe 2y ago
> Oh you will. It'll be that time you passed on an early job at a company that went on to IPO, or the project that went sour despite your best efforts. I’m only a bit further into my career than the person you’re responding to, but this sounds truly depressing and (personally) incredibly unlikely. I’ve been in the situation where I was offered a spot at a company which later got acquired for a few billion dollars. I barely ever think about it, and when I do it’s simply as a “huh! Life is weird!” kinda thing. It’s not something that weighs on me and never has been. I really can’t emphasize enough how little of a regret it is. Maybe I’d feel differently if I was worried about becoming fabulously wealthy, but that’s always seemed like a fool’s errand to me. It’s much easier to be happy if you just aspire to have enough money to take care of yourself, your family, and at hopefully contribute to your community a bit. Totally agree on the interpersonal stuff though.
pm215 2y ago
I'm about 25 years in, and no, I don't have regrets about work stuff that I come back and think about. Partly I've been very lucky in how things have worked out, of course, but also work just isn't that big a deal in the grand scheme of things. I have a few wistful "wonder what it would have been like if I took the other fork in the road back then" thoughts sometimes, but they're not about work and career choices.