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It's not the way I grew up, but there are group friendship patterns where friends give each other gifts just because it's what the group of friends do. It surp
by brudgers 3y ago
It's not the way I grew up, but there are group friendship patterns where friends give each other gifts just because it's what the group of friends do.
It surprised me when I saw it in action. But that's because I had the same reaction as you...it costs money and I was not raised to value friendships more than money. But some people are and the world is not worse for it.
It creates reciprocal obligations...debts. Here is an interesting talk on debt by the late David Graeber: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZIINXhGDcs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZIINXhGDcs
- JohnFen 3y agoI'm aware of such cultural patterns. I was really reacting to calling group gift-giving events a "shower" more than anything else. To me, a "shower" is a very specific form of gifting, for very a very specific purpose (births and weddings, as a form of community support for starting a new life). Thus my surprise.
- brudgers 3y agoA shower is a specific form of gift giving and the participants determine why, where, and when one is appropriate. Of course lightheartedness can spark outrage among people inclined to outrage.