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> Being dumb came with a shocking loss of privilege. This was humbling. Smart people, like the very attractive, get special treatment they do not know they are

> Being dumb came with a shocking loss of privilege. This was humbling. Smart people, like the very attractive, get special treatment they do not know they are getting. I think this is the most impactful part, could you elaborate? Describe a few of those experiences? People talk a lot about privilege, how taller people make more money for no apparent reason, how good looking people are treated better, particularly women, but IMHO it's intelligence that gives one the biggest boost in (non-romantic) relations with others in today's society. Sure, there's an awkward geek who doesn't get as much as they could with their IQ scores but if you're relatively intelligent, and especially if you're also talkative, you can see the attitudes of people (from the cable guy and cashier at the store to course instructors and priests) changing in real time as your sentences get longer and not corrupted with filling words, as you with drop a few two-dollar words or describe an even relatively simple physics mechanism. Their eyes light up. Maybe it's just because they have to give you more attention to process what you're saying but the difference is more than noticeable.

jonnathanson 14y ago
Maybe this is pure anecdote, but I've noticed that more intelligent (especially hyperintelligent) people tend to have more attention to give in a conversation. They're more present. They can follow what you're saying, or lead you in directions you hadn't considered (i.e., by surfacing insight). This makes for a dynamic, interesting conversation that -- to your point -- forces you to stay alert and engaged with them. The exchange is more engaging on both sides, regardless of subject matter. And subconsciously, we tend to think more highly of people who seem more engaged with what we're saying.
- antidoh 14y ago
  Humans being human, that's not universal. While I've noticed that some very intelligent people are more pleasant and enlightening to talk to, some others just can't seem to be bothered to give you their full attention. It's as if you don't meet their "worth paying attention to" threshold. Symptoms can be anything from a vague dullness of the eyes, to glancing or even reading their monitor, to just total loss of engagement in the middle of a sentence. But again, humans being humans, that's not limited to very intelligent people.
- cpeterso 14y ago
  Dale Carnegie says that the secret to being a good conversationalist is to be a good listener. People like to talk, especially about themselves (and neither Dale nor I mean that in a bad way). As an introvert, this realization and learning how to ask good questions (such as ones that don't have binary yes/no answers) made learning to converse with new people easier.
wpietri 14y ago
> Describe a few of those experiences? In high school I was pretty scruffy. The Man wasn't going to keep me down with his "combing" and whatnot. Fight the power! Anyhow, I got off shift at my dumb grocery store job and went to see the doctor for a checkup. Tired and grubby, I didn't say much during the early part of the visit. He was not quite contemptuous, but not far off. Until I got all nerd-fu on him, using medical terms and pronouncing long generic drug names correctly. Suddenly, I got respect. Instant respect. It was an eye-opening moment for me. > but IMHO it's intelligence that gives one the biggest boost I don't think it was just intelligence at work here. There was definitely a big element of social class. I may have looked like a white-trash stoner, but when I opened my mouth, suddenly I was in the club. I went from "other" to "in the tribe". I could have gotten the same effect by dressing well. But that's partly because I'm a straight white male; all that was keeping me out of the elite that day was a haircut, a shave, and an expensively comfortable outfit.
Agathos 14y ago
That claim didn't ring true for me at all. How do you accurately estimate someone's intelligence at a glance, as in the case of physical attraction? Maybe the writer lost some verbal quickness and assumed that was caused by his loss of intelligence. That can certainly be evaluated in a snap judgement, but it's different from intelligence. Of course I'm just being defensive here. I always speak slowly, but I still think I'm smart.

jonnathanson 14y ago

Maybe this is pure anecdote, but I've noticed that more intelligent (especially hyperintelligent) people tend to have more attention to give in a conversation. They're more present. They can follow what you're saying, or lead you in directions you hadn't considered (i.e., by surfacing insight). This makes for a dynamic, interesting conversation that -- to your point -- forces you to stay alert and engaged with them. The exchange is more engaging on both sides, regardless of subject matter. And subconsciously, we tend to think more highly of people who seem more engaged with what we're saying.

antidoh 14y ago
Humans being human, that's not universal. While I've noticed that some very intelligent people are more pleasant and enlightening to talk to, some others just can't seem to be bothered to give you their full attention. It's as if you don't meet their "worth paying attention to" threshold. Symptoms can be anything from a vague dullness of the eyes, to glancing or even reading their monitor, to just total loss of engagement in the middle of a sentence. But again, humans being humans, that's not limited to very intelligent people.
cpeterso 14y ago
Dale Carnegie says that the secret to being a good conversationalist is to be a good listener. People like to talk, especially about themselves (and neither Dale nor I mean that in a bad way). As an introvert, this realization and learning how to ask good questions (such as ones that don't have binary yes/no answers) made learning to converse with new people easier.

wpietri 14y ago

> Describe a few of those experiences? In high school I was pretty scruffy. The Man wasn't going to keep me down with his "combing" and whatnot. Fight the power! Anyhow, I got off shift at my dumb grocery store job and went to see the doctor for a checkup. Tired and grubby, I didn't say much during the early part of the visit. He was not quite contemptuous, but not far off. Until I got all nerd-fu on him, using medical terms and pronouncing long generic drug names correctly. Suddenly, I got respect. Instant respect. It was an eye-opening moment for me. > but IMHO it's intelligence that gives one the biggest boost I don't think it was just intelligence at work here. There was definitely a big element of social class. I may have looked like a white-trash stoner, but when I opened my mouth, suddenly I was in the club. I went from "other" to "in the tribe". I could have gotten the same effect by dressing well. But that's partly because I'm a straight white male; all that was keeping me out of the elite that day was a haircut, a shave, and an expensively comfortable outfit.

Agathos 14y ago

That claim didn't ring true for me at all. How do you accurately estimate someone's intelligence at a glance, as in the case of physical attraction? Maybe the writer lost some verbal quickness and assumed that was caused by his loss of intelligence. That can certainly be evaluated in a snap judgement, but it's different from intelligence. Of course I'm just being defensive here. I always speak slowly, but I still think I'm smart.