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This is old, but my most pointless project: The CEO wanted a screen in every hall that showed the company "EnGUAGEment meter". Users would have to go to the a

This is old, but my most pointless project: The CEO wanted a screen in every hall that showed the company "EnGUAGEment meter". Users would have to go to the app, choose from 10 or so canned messages like "Feeling productive", "Ready to conquer the day", and other such HR speak the CEO (or rather the HR committee he put on the important business of picking the list) felt was motivational. This would update a page that scrolled their photos and chosen message, and showed the "EnGUAGEment" as a percent of total employees responding on a car dashboard style guage. It hovered around 30-40% every day. On the CEO's birthday they'd drive that baby up to 70 to 80%

AlexDragusin 3y ago
Bill Lumbergh approves of this!
- shireboy 3y ago
  Very much so. Also Michael Scott. This was a period of my life when I wanted to like The Office, but it was just too realistic for me.
  - pryelluw 3y ago
    Why watch office when life same.
tukajo 3y ago
This is the funniest thing I think I've read all day. Thank you.
morkalork 3y ago
I have a terrible urge to build an automated version of this with computer vision and give it the name "EnGuAgEmEnT MeTeR"
- elwell 3y ago
  put it on the blockchain
  - hestefisk 3y ago
    And AI-enable it.
  - nathancahill 3y ago
    Pieces of FlairCoin
- stavros 3y ago
  Please spell it correctly, though, as it's "engaugement".
baw-bag 3y ago
Oh my god, it isn't the same product but I was the user of a similar thing at an old job I had for 2 years only it was a slider from 1-10. I always chose 1 no matter how productive, happy or driven I felt. I remember that HR called me in because of this and in a round-about way said I can't just keep doing that as it was bringing the whole purpose of the system down. If I didn't want to interact with the system then I should just select a higher value and a few months later, my manager said that I didn't need to use that system any more. The funny thing is that in my current job, they use something called "Dailybot" or something integrated to google chat where you check-in and once a week, give an emoji between 1-5 about my productivity or something... Unhappy face for me. What value is this supposed to provide? If you take part, it will be 8-9-10 regardless to "look good" and if you don't take part like me, it drags the entire team to an average of 4-5-6 which is the same as not having the system at all and yields the real outcome of average.
- bombcar 3y ago
  The job is to provide 8-9-10 to put on spreadsheets and PowerPoints somewhere. In other word pointless. The only time you can even halfheartedly trust the results is when the peoples surveyed are almost adversarial- like customers.
  - MajimasEyepatch 3y ago
    This is what happens when you invite HR to an OKR meeting.
- preommr 3y ago
  Probably unpopular opinion: Silly excercises like this are a good way to see who bends the knee and who is a maverick, and projects only work when most people are docile enough to go with the flow and follow orders. Identifying people that make waves and evaluating if they're worth the hassle is an important part of running a successful business. This is often sad and depressing, but sometimes it's just about doing your job, and getting some good food after work to counterbalance the bullshit.
  - 3y ago
thefourthchime 3y ago
This is a joke right?
valicord 3y ago
Is "guage" some sort of joke that I don't get or just a misspelling?
- mkl 3y ago
  It's a misspelling of "gauge", judging by "on a car dashboard style guage". Was pretty confused up to that point.
  - jknutson 3y ago
    Maybe it’s some sort of in joke for the company. At least, that’s how I took it— alongside it being an obvious reference to a speedometer. My intuition was that maybe the company’s name was “gauge”, or better yet the CEO’s name was gauge. I really hope it was the latter. Makes me think of Hooli from Silicon Valley for some reason lol
livinglist 3y ago
For me, more money == more motivation, nothing else
replwoacause 3y ago
The more experience I get working in corporate environments the more I hate the letters CEO and HR. Truly some of the wackest people in these positions.

AlexDragusin 3y ago

Bill Lumbergh approves of this!

shireboy 3y ago
Very much so. Also Michael Scott. This was a period of my life when I wanted to like The Office, but it was just too realistic for me.
- pryelluw 3y ago
  Why watch office when life same.

tukajo 3y ago

This is the funniest thing I think I've read all day. Thank you.

morkalork 3y ago

I have a terrible urge to build an automated version of this with computer vision and give it the name "EnGuAgEmEnT MeTeR"

elwell 3y ago
put it on the blockchain
- hestefisk 3y ago
  And AI-enable it.
- nathancahill 3y ago
  Pieces of FlairCoin
stavros 3y ago
Please spell it correctly, though, as it's "engaugement".

baw-bag 3y ago

Oh my god, it isn't the same product but I was the user of a similar thing at an old job I had for 2 years only it was a slider from 1-10. I always chose 1 no matter how productive, happy or driven I felt. I remember that HR called me in because of this and in a round-about way said I can't just keep doing that as it was bringing the whole purpose of the system down. If I didn't want to interact with the system then I should just select a higher value and a few months later, my manager said that I didn't need to use that system any more. The funny thing is that in my current job, they use something called "Dailybot" or something integrated to google chat where you check-in and once a week, give an emoji between 1-5 about my productivity or something... Unhappy face for me. What value is this supposed to provide? If you take part, it will be 8-9-10 regardless to "look good" and if you don't take part like me, it drags the entire team to an average of 4-5-6 which is the same as not having the system at all and yields the real outcome of average.

bombcar 3y ago
The job is to provide 8-9-10 to put on spreadsheets and PowerPoints somewhere. In other word pointless. The only time you can even halfheartedly trust the results is when the peoples surveyed are almost adversarial- like customers.
- MajimasEyepatch 3y ago
  This is what happens when you invite HR to an OKR meeting.
preommr 3y ago
Probably unpopular opinion: Silly excercises like this are a good way to see who bends the knee and who is a maverick, and projects only work when most people are docile enough to go with the flow and follow orders. Identifying people that make waves and evaluating if they're worth the hassle is an important part of running a successful business. This is often sad and depressing, but sometimes it's just about doing your job, and getting some good food after work to counterbalance the bullshit.
- 3y ago

thefourthchime 3y ago

This is a joke right?

valicord 3y ago

Is "guage" some sort of joke that I don't get or just a misspelling?

mkl 3y ago
It's a misspelling of "gauge", judging by "on a car dashboard style guage". Was pretty confused up to that point.
- jknutson 3y ago
  Maybe it’s some sort of in joke for the company. At least, that’s how I took it— alongside it being an obvious reference to a speedometer. My intuition was that maybe the company’s name was “gauge”, or better yet the CEO’s name was gauge. I really hope it was the latter. Makes me think of Hooli from Silicon Valley for some reason lol

livinglist 3y ago

For me, more money == more motivation, nothing else

replwoacause 3y ago

The more experience I get working in corporate environments the more I hate the letters CEO and HR. Truly some of the wackest people in these positions.