7 ms·

The Rise of the Remote Husband

47 points by edward 3y ago

bell-cot 3y ago
Decades ago, I knew two couples doing the "she heads off to work, he stays at home" thing. Both husbands were doing essentially non-remote work at home (academia and a home-office business). And had multiple children to look after, at home, as part of the deal.
dudul 3y ago
Can't read behind pay wall. Does the article actually provide data or is it just based on the 5 "examples" provided in the beginning?
- theonething 3y ago
  Don't have time to read it myself right now, but here it is: https://archive.is/dh4fn https://archive.is/dh4fn
- ghaff 3y ago
  Just some data about the percentage of each gender who can work remotely--which isn't all that different in the scheme of things. (Slightly higher for men as you might expect.)
- verteu 3y ago
  Unpaywalled: https://archive.is/dh4fn https://archive.is/dh4fn Not much data. Just: > Different occupations have also had to take different approaches to remote working...About half of people working in computer or mathematical jobs work remotely full-time. The upshot is that, in aggregate, it is easier for men to work from wherever they please. A survey carried out by McKinsey, a consultancy, found that 38% of working men had the option to work remotely full-time, compared with 30% of women. Roughly half of women report being unable to work remotely at all, compared with 39% of men.
- ulrashida 3y ago
  There doesn't appear to be much of a point to the article.
toomuchtodo 3y ago
https://archive.today/dh4fn https://archive.today/dh4fn
paxys 3y ago
I never thought about it before reading this but most couples I know fall into this category. Probably because they largely fit the "tech guy marries non-tech gal" stereotype.
- nonameiguess 3y ago
  I don't know that it means anything, but I'm a tech guy married to a tech gal and we still fit this category. In our case, it's because her work project is classified. The company itself allows full-remote work if your project is unclassified, but you can't get a SCIF in your house. It's amusing to me that this article claims it is usually the case that the husband is still not cooking and cleaning even though he's home. I'm cooking and cleaning all the damn time. With all the time spent at home, cooking has become my favorite hobby. I am quite often sneaking in prep for some elaborate, showy dinner while waiting for a build to finish or on a call that doesn't require me to present or speak.
  - znpy 3y ago
    > I'm cooking and cleaning all the damn time. You don't fit the narrative, so most likely cases like yours are being ignored.
  - bglusman 3y ago
    I didn’t read that part as saying “they’re not doing these things at all”, just that they’re not staying home them specifically to do them… they’re not “employed” as a “homemaker”, they are working from home. Unclear if you read it this way or are just commenting that you do more of those and you used to, several sibling comments seem to take, from your comment or the article, that this was a focus, and I don’t think it was?
  - red-iron-pine 3y ago
    the F in SCIF is for "facility" -- generally implies a very secure location like charged windows to protect from TEMPTEST emissions, etc.
  - vinni2 3y ago
picklerish 3y ago
https://web.archive.org/web/20240404213835/https://www.economist.com/united-states/2024/04/04/the-rise-of-the-remote-husband https://web.archive.org/web/20240404213835/https://www.econo...
lchengify 3y ago
I have a lot of tech / healthcare couples in my friend group and this is definitely the arrangement. Especially true since healthcare careers have very different timelines than tech. In once instance, one partner is a clinician and absolutely has to be on site 5 days a week, not counting on-call. The other works 100% remote but the company is global, so depending on the week they may be on Europe time or Australia time. This is definitely a work arrangement I couldn't have imagined being common 10 years ago. This shift will likely be one of the defining economic changes between the 10's and the 20's.
ctrw 3y ago
[flagged]
- slater 3y ago
  good lord, what a take
  - ctrw 3y ago
    We've spent the last 50 years telling women they shouldn't be house wives. The results are as predictable as the sun rising. I don't understand how people can pretend that home management is an easy job that you can pick up whenever you need. Somehow it's feminist to claim that a profession with thousands of years of history and tradition by apprenticeship is easy enough to pick up in an afternoon when you need it.
    - blowski 3y ago
      Do you think a woman should have a choice whether she remains a housewife or gets a career? Can a man do the “housewife’s” job?
      - ctrw 3y ago
        [flagged]
        blowski 3y ago
        I’d like to see empirical evidence that supports any of those claims.
    - triceratops 3y ago
      > I don't understand how people can pretend that home management is an easy job that you can pick up whenever you need. I preferred learning how to cook than take such a blow to my manhood. I mean, that's the one thing real men are supposed to do - put food on the f*ckin' table. It takes a brave man to admit he struggles to put food on his own table, with his own hands, and relies instead on a cook at a restaurant - likely another man. Or needs his woman to do it.
mschuster91 3y ago
Not all that surprising - "care work" of all kinds, at least if going by distribution of unpaid care work [1], kindergarten [2] and later education [3] or nursing [4], is utterly dominated by women. Almost all care work by definition has to be done at the workplace, whereas (as we discovered in Covid) a lot of traditional "men jobs" (i.e. almost everything outside of mining, industry and security) can be done from home. It's going to be an interesting next few years, as this shift can and does have serious implications not just on workplace and work condition equality question, but also if it will fuel further discontent among those men who have to go commute to a workplace vs those men who can enjoy the ability to work from home. [1] https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-report-2022/in-full/2-2-gender-gaps-in-care-work/ https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-repor... [2] https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2024/02/12/over-96-of-kindergarten-teachers-are-women-research-shows-heres-how-to-attract-more-men/ https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2024/02/12/over-96-... [3] https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=EAG_PERS_SHARE_AGE https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=EAG_PERS_SHARE... (you have to change the filter to "Pre-primary to tertiary education", then scroll down to the totalization rows at the bottom) [4] https://www.statista.com/statistics/1099804/distribution-of-nurses-across-regions-worldwide-by-gender/ https://www.statista.com/statistics/1099804/distribution-of-...
bdangubic 3y ago
yes I do the cooking, yes I do the cleaning… :)
nickburns 3y ago
something to be said about 'sexes in the workplace' here. women continue to make real progress toward equal representation in the physical workplace, which inevitably detracts from time for domestic responsibilities; and apparently a fair number of men are now taking their careers home, to the extent that it permits them to maintain some degree of organizational 'presence', while inevitably taking on more domestic responsibility. remarkable sorta-flip for sure.
phendrenad2 3y ago
This is only an interesting phenomenon in so far as it shows how little progress we've made fixing gender imbalances across various fields.
- bdjsiqoocwk 3y ago
  You're assuming it needs "fixing". A different possibility is that people are choosing the things they prefer and what you see if biased by those preferences. In the latter scenario there's no need to "fix" anything.

47 points by edward 3y ago

Decades ago, I knew two couples doing the "she heads off to work, he stays at home" thing. Both husbands were doing essentially non-remote work at home (academia and a home-office business). And had multiple children to look after, at home, as part of the deal.

dudul 3y ago

Can't read behind pay wall. Does the article actually provide data or is it just based on the 5 "examples" provided in the beginning?

theonething 3y ago
Don't have time to read it myself right now, but here it is: https://archive.is/dh4fn https://archive.is/dh4fn
ghaff 3y ago
Just some data about the percentage of each gender who can work remotely--which isn't all that different in the scheme of things. (Slightly higher for men as you might expect.)
verteu 3y ago
Unpaywalled: https://archive.is/dh4fn https://archive.is/dh4fn Not much data. Just: > Different occupations have also had to take different approaches to remote working...About half of people working in computer or mathematical jobs work remotely full-time. The upshot is that, in aggregate, it is easier for men to work from wherever they please. A survey carried out by McKinsey, a consultancy, found that 38% of working men had the option to work remotely full-time, compared with 30% of women. Roughly half of women report being unable to work remotely at all, compared with 39% of men.
ulrashida 3y ago
There doesn't appear to be much of a point to the article.

toomuchtodo 3y ago

https://archive.today/dh4fn https://archive.today/dh4fn

paxys 3y ago

I never thought about it before reading this but most couples I know fall into this category. Probably because they largely fit the "tech guy marries non-tech gal" stereotype.

nonameiguess 3y ago
I don't know that it means anything, but I'm a tech guy married to a tech gal and we still fit this category. In our case, it's because her work project is classified. The company itself allows full-remote work if your project is unclassified, but you can't get a SCIF in your house. It's amusing to me that this article claims it is usually the case that the husband is still not cooking and cleaning even though he's home. I'm cooking and cleaning all the damn time. With all the time spent at home, cooking has become my favorite hobby. I am quite often sneaking in prep for some elaborate, showy dinner while waiting for a build to finish or on a call that doesn't require me to present or speak.
- znpy 3y ago
  > I'm cooking and cleaning all the damn time. You don't fit the narrative, so most likely cases like yours are being ignored.
- bglusman 3y ago
  I didn’t read that part as saying “they’re not doing these things at all”, just that they’re not staying home them specifically to do them… they’re not “employed” as a “homemaker”, they are working from home. Unclear if you read it this way or are just commenting that you do more of those and you used to, several sibling comments seem to take, from your comment or the article, that this was a focus, and I don’t think it was?
- red-iron-pine 3y ago
  the F in SCIF is for "facility" -- generally implies a very secure location like charged windows to protect from TEMPTEST emissions, etc.
- vinni2 3y ago

picklerish 3y ago

https://web.archive.org/web/20240404213835/https://www.economist.com/united-states/2024/04/04/the-rise-of-the-remote-husband https://web.archive.org/web/20240404213835/https://www.econo...

lchengify 3y ago

I have a lot of tech / healthcare couples in my friend group and this is definitely the arrangement. Especially true since healthcare careers have very different timelines than tech. In once instance, one partner is a clinician and absolutely has to be on site 5 days a week, not counting on-call. The other works 100% remote but the company is global, so depending on the week they may be on Europe time or Australia time. This is definitely a work arrangement I couldn't have imagined being common 10 years ago. This shift will likely be one of the defining economic changes between the 10's and the 20's.

ctrw 3y ago

[flagged]

slater 3y ago
good lord, what a take
- ctrw 3y ago
  We've spent the last 50 years telling women they shouldn't be house wives. The results are as predictable as the sun rising. I don't understand how people can pretend that home management is an easy job that you can pick up whenever you need. Somehow it's feminist to claim that a profession with thousands of years of history and tradition by apprenticeship is easy enough to pick up in an afternoon when you need it.
  - blowski 3y ago
    Do you think a woman should have a choice whether she remains a housewife or gets a career? Can a man do the “housewife’s” job?
    - ctrw 3y ago
      [flagged]
      - blowski 3y ago
        I’d like to see empirical evidence that supports any of those claims.
  - triceratops 3y ago
    > I don't understand how people can pretend that home management is an easy job that you can pick up whenever you need. I preferred learning how to cook than take such a blow to my manhood. I mean, that's the one thing real men are supposed to do - put food on the f*ckin' table. It takes a brave man to admit he struggles to put food on his own table, with his own hands, and relies instead on a cook at a restaurant - likely another man. Or needs his woman to do it.

mschuster91 3y ago

Not all that surprising - "care work" of all kinds, at least if going by distribution of unpaid care work [1], kindergarten [2] and later education [3] or nursing [4], is utterly dominated by women. Almost all care work by definition has to be done at the workplace, whereas (as we discovered in Covid) a lot of traditional "men jobs" (i.e. almost everything outside of mining, industry and security) can be done from home. It's going to be an interesting next few years, as this shift can and does have serious implications not just on workplace and work condition equality question, but also if it will fuel further discontent among those men who have to go commute to a workplace vs those men who can enjoy the ability to work from home. [1] https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-report-2022/in-full/2-2-gender-gaps-in-care-work/ https://www.weforum.org/publications/global-gender-gap-repor... [2] https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2024/02/12/over-96-of-kindergarten-teachers-are-women-research-shows-heres-how-to-attract-more-men/ https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2024/02/12/over-96-... [3] https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=EAG_PERS_SHARE_AGE https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=EAG_PERS_SHARE... (you have to change the filter to "Pre-primary to tertiary education", then scroll down to the totalization rows at the bottom) [4] https://www.statista.com/statistics/1099804/distribution-of-nurses-across-regions-worldwide-by-gender/ https://www.statista.com/statistics/1099804/distribution-of-...

bdangubic 3y ago

yes I do the cooking, yes I do the cleaning… :)

nickburns 3y ago

something to be said about 'sexes in the workplace' here. women continue to make real progress toward equal representation in the physical workplace, which inevitably detracts from time for domestic responsibilities; and apparently a fair number of men are now taking their careers home, to the extent that it permits them to maintain some degree of organizational 'presence', while inevitably taking on more domestic responsibility. remarkable sorta-flip for sure.

phendrenad2 3y ago

This is only an interesting phenomenon in so far as it shows how little progress we've made fixing gender imbalances across various fields.

bdjsiqoocwk 3y ago
You're assuming it needs "fixing". A different possibility is that people are choosing the things they prefer and what you see if biased by those preferences. In the latter scenario there's no need to "fix" anything.