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> who I am Who you are is a software engineer that gets the bills paid. Why would it be a "disguise" to act like upper class and not a disguise to act like low

> who I am Who you are is a software engineer that gets the bills paid. Why would it be a "disguise" to act like upper class and not a disguise to act like lower class? If you weren't upper class you could never pretend to be it over long periods. Just face reality of who you are and have become. Your past is no more "the real you" than your present. You and me and everybody reading this grew up walking around in diapers, that doesn't mean that it is the "real us". It's just the past, it's gone, good bye.

metalforever 3y ago
I am sorry, it is hard to explain the issue . It's not like this. I do have to pretend to be it over long periods.
Dalewyn 3y ago
The brutal reality is people tend to discriminate those in a different social class. It's nothing as blatant as Indian Caste, but it's reality. This goes both ways too, upper discriminating lower and vice versa, and it transcends cultures. For a practical example, nearly every single Black man who succeed(ed) in America doesn't speak so-called "Negro English", they all speak "normal" English. President Obama is perhaps the most familiar example. I have no doubt at least some of this is them putting on an act to demonstrate they are in the same social class as their would-be peers. And on the other side of that coin, lower class Black men generally disparage characteristics of the higher classes such as being educated and carrying yourself more formally. For better or worse, if you want to join a different social class you have to put up some act to get your foot in the door. Otherwise you'll be kicked right out. It's brutally unfortunate, but humans (and all living beings in general) prefer those who are alike and disdain those who aren't. Hell, the audience here should look at themselves in a mirror: White shirt upper-middle class discriminating the elite upper class and the commonly middle and lower classes is everywhere. Screw those MBAs, amirite? The problem is Joe over there doesn't understand tech, amirite?
- carlosjobim 3y ago
  You're not getting it. The "act" becomes you, you become the "act". The commenter I answered is not from a different social class anymore, he's just remembering. Just as you "act" grown up when you're growing up, then gradually you are grown up and that is you. And Obama? What makes you believe he would speak "Negro English"? He is not from that background. The truth is that people can't really join a different social class without fundamentally belonging to that class. And belonging to a class depends on what you presently do and have, not what you did or had in your past. If the commenter was not a software engineer, no acting of his could fool people for a long time. With the exception for expert con-men. So even though he might feel as if he's faking it, the part that really counts is real.
  - Dalewyn 3y ago
    The presumably desired end result is you joining the new class, so yes you will naturally "become the act" at the end. My point is you need to put on that act to get your foot in the door at all, otherwise chances are good you'll get shooed away for no justifiable reason.
    - carlosjobim 3y ago
      The number one mistake I see people make in their life is giving importance to how other people treat them. How another person acts towards you only says something about that individual. It doesn't say anything about you and it doesn't say anything about any "class" or other group of people. I've been treated as shit thousands of times in my life, for no reason, and treated well ten times more, also for no reason. We get these things in our heads that it's about us and that we're the victims of a world of discrimination, but what it was in reality is that we met some rude people and some jerks. To get your foot into the door at all, as you mentioned, you have to demonstrate some value. Is that an act? I wouldn't say it is. I would even say that many people will have more patience and be more open to you if you're from a different background than them, or if you're young. The demands to be considered a part of polite society are usually low, so that anybody who wants to participate can enter. Politeness is first, which is free to learn and free to execute. Apart from that you need clean clothes and a clean person. Does that mean other people have to like you? No. If you're from a rough background and move into a different rough neighborhood, the people there will not necessarily like you either.
- FredPret 3y ago
  Around here, if anything, MBAs are categorized along with Joe in your example. (Although many of us have MBAs)
blaufast 3y ago
It’s not a disguise. Think of it as time travel to 100 years ago. After you learn to fit in, the old part is alive and well in there still. You from both times in the same body and mind.
- metalforever 3y ago
  It's exactly like this.

metalforever 3y ago

I am sorry, it is hard to explain the issue . It's not like this. I do have to pretend to be it over long periods.

Dalewyn 3y ago

The brutal reality is people tend to discriminate those in a different social class. It's nothing as blatant as Indian Caste, but it's reality. This goes both ways too, upper discriminating lower and vice versa, and it transcends cultures. For a practical example, nearly every single Black man who succeed(ed) in America doesn't speak so-called "Negro English", they all speak "normal" English. President Obama is perhaps the most familiar example. I have no doubt at least some of this is them putting on an act to demonstrate they are in the same social class as their would-be peers. And on the other side of that coin, lower class Black men generally disparage characteristics of the higher classes such as being educated and carrying yourself more formally. For better or worse, if you want to join a different social class you have to put up some act to get your foot in the door. Otherwise you'll be kicked right out. It's brutally unfortunate, but humans (and all living beings in general) prefer those who are alike and disdain those who aren't. Hell, the audience here should look at themselves in a mirror: White shirt upper-middle class discriminating the elite upper class and the commonly middle and lower classes is everywhere. Screw those MBAs, amirite? The problem is Joe over there doesn't understand tech, amirite?

carlosjobim 3y ago
You're not getting it. The "act" becomes you, you become the "act". The commenter I answered is not from a different social class anymore, he's just remembering. Just as you "act" grown up when you're growing up, then gradually you are grown up and that is you. And Obama? What makes you believe he would speak "Negro English"? He is not from that background. The truth is that people can't really join a different social class without fundamentally belonging to that class. And belonging to a class depends on what you presently do and have, not what you did or had in your past. If the commenter was not a software engineer, no acting of his could fool people for a long time. With the exception for expert con-men. So even though he might feel as if he's faking it, the part that really counts is real.
- Dalewyn 3y ago
  The presumably desired end result is you joining the new class, so yes you will naturally "become the act" at the end. My point is you need to put on that act to get your foot in the door at all, otherwise chances are good you'll get shooed away for no justifiable reason.
  - carlosjobim 3y ago
    The number one mistake I see people make in their life is giving importance to how other people treat them. How another person acts towards you only says something about that individual. It doesn't say anything about you and it doesn't say anything about any "class" or other group of people. I've been treated as shit thousands of times in my life, for no reason, and treated well ten times more, also for no reason. We get these things in our heads that it's about us and that we're the victims of a world of discrimination, but what it was in reality is that we met some rude people and some jerks. To get your foot into the door at all, as you mentioned, you have to demonstrate some value. Is that an act? I wouldn't say it is. I would even say that many people will have more patience and be more open to you if you're from a different background than them, or if you're young. The demands to be considered a part of polite society are usually low, so that anybody who wants to participate can enter. Politeness is first, which is free to learn and free to execute. Apart from that you need clean clothes and a clean person. Does that mean other people have to like you? No. If you're from a rough background and move into a different rough neighborhood, the people there will not necessarily like you either.
FredPret 3y ago
Around here, if anything, MBAs are categorized along with Joe in your example. (Although many of us have MBAs)

blaufast 3y ago

It’s not a disguise. Think of it as time travel to 100 years ago. After you learn to fit in, the old part is alive and well in there still. You from both times in the same body and mind.

metalforever 3y ago
It's exactly like this.