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There are many convincing arguments for kids but deathbed regrets are not one of them. First, who cares about what I will regret at the end? It’s the end. Secon

There are many convincing arguments for kids but deathbed regrets are not one of them. First, who cares about what I will regret at the end? It’s the end. Second, I don’t trust the perspectives of people in the extreme situation of “just about to die”. They invariably have romanticised views about life, because they’re about to lose it. They’re not at all thinking of the huge stresses of children

esafak 3y ago
Regret does not set in just as you are about to die.
- bowsamic 3y ago
  How do you know that? It only speaks of the deathbed. Regardless having children simply to assuage future regret seems very strange to me
  - esafak 3y ago
    Because I know such people, and it is inconceivable that one would notice one's childless status only before dying. Why does it seem strange to act so as to minimize future regret? That's just common sense. This principle guided Jeff Bezos, for one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwG_qR6XmDQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwG_qR6XmDQ
    - bowsamic 3y ago
      Because it’s a selfish reason and also it’s entirely based on speculation. Who knows what I’ll regret?
      - em-bee 3y ago
        the best way to minimize future regret is to make deliberate life decisions. look at all the factors, consider options and consequences. for example i wish i had gotten married and have children earlier. however, looking back, i see no way i could have achieved this. there is no choice i made that i could have changed, given what i knew then, and even given what i know now. sure there were opportunities that i missed. like this one girl that showed interest in me, that i didn't pursue. would my life have been different if i had chosen her? absolutely. would it have been better? i have no idea. so how can i regret a decision, where i can't even assess the outcome if i had made a different choice? the only thing to really regret are dumb decisions. the ones where you already know ahead of time that they would be dumb. like drunk driving, or stuff like that. but most regrets, if you think them through, should turn out to be things that you probably could not have made better anyways.
        bowsamic 3y ago
        I have zero regrets right now and I don't care if I might have regrets in the future.
- deleted 3y ago
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esafak 3y ago

Regret does not set in just as you are about to die.

bowsamic 3y ago
How do you know that? It only speaks of the deathbed. Regardless having children simply to assuage future regret seems very strange to me
- esafak 3y ago
  Because I know such people, and it is inconceivable that one would notice one's childless status only before dying. Why does it seem strange to act so as to minimize future regret? That's just common sense. This principle guided Jeff Bezos, for one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwG_qR6XmDQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwG_qR6XmDQ
  - bowsamic 3y ago
    Because it’s a selfish reason and also it’s entirely based on speculation. Who knows what I’ll regret?
    - em-bee 3y ago
      the best way to minimize future regret is to make deliberate life decisions. look at all the factors, consider options and consequences. for example i wish i had gotten married and have children earlier. however, looking back, i see no way i could have achieved this. there is no choice i made that i could have changed, given what i knew then, and even given what i know now. sure there were opportunities that i missed. like this one girl that showed interest in me, that i didn't pursue. would my life have been different if i had chosen her? absolutely. would it have been better? i have no idea. so how can i regret a decision, where i can't even assess the outcome if i had made a different choice? the only thing to really regret are dumb decisions. the ones where you already know ahead of time that they would be dumb. like drunk driving, or stuff like that. but most regrets, if you think them through, should turn out to be things that you probably could not have made better anyways.
      - bowsamic 3y ago
        I have zero regrets right now and I don't care if I might have regrets in the future.
deleted 3y ago
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