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I was 5 when I was traveling across my neighborhood on my bike to go visit my friends. I'd tell my parent where I was heading and then I'd go. I was 6 when I re
by MisterBastahrd 3y ago
I was 5 when I was traveling across my neighborhood on my bike to go visit my friends. I'd tell my parent where I was heading and then I'd go. I was 6 when I received my first Victorinox swiss army knife and learned how to sharpen it to a razor's edge. I was 7 when I started going to a local swim club by myself, saving up a week's allowance for a day at the pool and some candy. I was 8 when my very best friend moved away. I got in fights with multiple friends' older brothers for teasing me about it and gave almost as good as I got given my age disadvantage. I was 9 when I was travelling to the end of the neighborhood, parking my bike by a friends' house, then hiking a quarter mile to go fishing in a river pond.
Parents these days aren't rational at all. They worry about protecting the physical nature of the child and leave their development and ability to accurately assess risk on their own as an afterthought. That's how you perpetuate failure: with children who grow up while never possessing the life experience necessary to properly raise kids of their own. The world simply isn't that fucking scary.
- mcv 3y agoSame here, and I try to let my kids do the same, but they don't seem to want it. My youngest is 9 and still wants me to bring him to school and pick him up. My oldest has a Swiss army knife, but I don't think he's ever used it. They almost never want to play outside, hang with their friends or anything like that. Maybe I should kick them out of the house, but that gets a lot of resistance and feels like punishment to them. And they're invariably back in 15 minutes. At least they learned how to cross the street safely at a young age. That's the one bit of independence that stuck.
- trealira 3y ago> Maybe I should kick them out of the house, but that gets a lot of resistance and feels like punishment to them. This is what my grandparents did to my mom and aunts and uncles when they were growing up during the 60s and 70s. They weren't allowed back inside before dinner, but they had to return by sunset. They were used to it, and spent their time playing in the woods and playing games with the neighborhood kids. Nowadays, if you kicked them outside the house, they'd probably just have each other to play with, because kids don't play outside as much.
- silverquiet 3y agoI was 7 years old when I realized there was no god and death would mean the permanent end of my consciousness. I also saw the myriad ways people have of dying early on and really didn't want to end up among them. The world might not be that scary, but existence (particularly the inevitable but delayable end of it) is. I suppose it's a Nietzsche thing; the "Death of God" turns us into "The Last Man".
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- randomdata 3y ago> They worry about protecting the physical nature of the child They aren't worried about the child. Anyone with a typical five year old knows they'll be able to cross the neighbourhood just fine. What they are actually worried about what other adults will think the five year old is seen out alone.
- MisterBastahrd 3y agoOther adults have seen five year olds out on their own for literally thousands of years across many cultures. For all the talk about the man in the white van with the candy, it's always just been talk. If you'd even attempt to argue that it's more dangerous today, then I'd counter it by saying that it must be something occurring in the same generation as the parents who fear for their children, and maybe they need to do some additional introspection. That they aren't worried about the child is just an irrational statement. If there was nothing to worry about, then there's no reason to keep the kid cooped up out of public sight.
- randomdata 3y agoYou must have misread something. The concern isn’t nebulous adults in white vans, it’s the “friendly” neighbourhood busybodies saying “do you really think you should be letting your kids roam free” that people fear. Social pressure is a hell of a drug. Yeah, it’s nonsensical, but such is people. Similar to why most people aren’t having children in their sexual prime, instead waiting until they are of geriatric age. The harsh reality is that society says it’s wrong to have children “young” and ostracizes anyone who does. Just ask any teenage mother about the scorn they had to deal with. Thousands of years ago most people didn't have time to sit around and evaluate what other people, especially those outside of the immediate tribe, do. Back then, life was actually hard. Only the richest kings could even begin to live in that kind of luxury. And even up until around the 1950s, most people lived rurally, so the kids weren't apt to leave the property anyway – if they did, who was going to see it? Not to mention that there wasn't the "You must go to university or you will ruin your life" nonsense that has emerged in the past ~30 years. Hell, in my grandparents time, it was uncommon to even go to high school. Back then, growing up and having children was celebrated, not featured on MTV with a show that tries to convince people to remain children for life. The times have changed and the people have adjusted accordingly. When the public welcomes children back into the world, the parents will let their children back out into the world. But so long as the passive onlookers who don't know how to think rationally or keep their mouth shut believe that children should be nothing more than porcelain dolls that are there only to hang on the shelf for guests to admire...
- ip26 3y agoSounds like your parents were overprotective. Why did you have to wait until you were 6 to use a pocket knife? Why couldn’t 6 year old you go to the pool by yourself? Your parents were overly worried with protecting your physical nature. They robbed you of years developing your own ability to assess risk.