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"It is a wise thing to be polite; consequently, it is a stupid thing to be rude." - Similar thing was said by my grandmother. She said that no matter how hard i
by Xeyz0r 3y ago
"It is a wise thing to be polite; consequently, it is a stupid thing to be rude." - Similar thing was said by my grandmother. She said that no matter how hard it os to face a rude person. You have to smile back coz' you don’t know what consequences of your own rudeness you will have.
- surgical_fire 3y ago"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them as much" I find it easier to think in these terms.
- Xeyz0r 3y agoOr ignore them. People who actually are giving us a hard time will always make us strong people.
- imiric 3y agoEh, I would expand that quote to include "to people who are polite to you" in both cases. Being polite to rude people is a good way for them to try to take advantage of you. At the very least, if you don't enjoy being rude, it's best to ignore them. In the case of the article, HR messed up by being rude to someone who was polite, and so, got the well deserved cold shoulder.
- lf-non 3y agoThis may be culture specific but I wouldn't consider the cold shoulder response to be impolite.
- imiric 3y agoMe neither. Travis took the ignore approach. But I would certainly find it acceptable to respond rudely to rudeness. Tit for tat.
- AnimalMuppet 3y agoRudeness can feel good in the moment. After the moment passes, though, I don't really like myself after I've been rude. That's not who I want to be, even if it is deserved. On the other hand, last night I was talking to a cop. He said that, in dealing with unruly people, you have to use swear words if you want to get through to them. It's the language that they understand. So there may be a place where rudeness is the only thing that will work. It's probably not every time I'm rude, though...
- imiric 3y agoI agree, with both your dislike of being rude, and with your cop friend. But responding rudely to rudeness is not about it feeling good. Most people don't enjoy being rude, which is why we avoid it. But sometimes it's necessary in order for the other person to understand that this is not acceptable behavior. Otherwise, they will continue to be rude both to you and others.
- stetrain 3y agoBeing polite doesn't mean agreeing to all requests. You can politely and firmly decline.
- veunes 3y agoYeah... You pretty much can do anything politely
- mettamage 3y agoJust brainstorming about this thought a bit I'm thinking like. Aggression can invite aggression more quickly than neutrality does. Rudeness invites rudeness easier than politeness does. Also, politeness is not kindness or even being nice. People in the UK are good at showcasing the difference. Politeness is closest to simply being civil. When someone is rude to me and I have strong reason to believe they will continue to be rude to me, the first thing I'm thinking off is whether it's feasible to cut them out of my life entirely as fast as possible. Being rude back will only delay and overcomplicate that process. Being polite while immediately cutting them off won't.
- veunes 3y agoI've heard that in order to rule your like 'bad' emotions you have to do the opposite ones. Like if you feel anger and want to punch a wall you need to stroke it..
- devjab 3y agoYou shut those emotions down. Which can be a really long journey for some people and probably easy for no one. One route is stoicism, but that’s a little depressing in my opinion, so I much prefer mindfulness and self-confidence. Whatever your method you’ll also need to be assertive and this too will be easier for some people than others. Some of the easy first steps to take is to imagine that unpleasant people are having the worst day of their lives. We’re talking their dog dying, their spouse having affairs on FaceTime with their boss who fires them during their act, their car exploding all their clothes being too short and their doctor telling them they have cancer bad. Or imagine them naked or whatever which either generates sympathy or makes them ridiculous in your mind. And then use assertiveness to get away from them as fast as possible. At least in civilized society where going down the path of Khorne is frowned upon for whatever reason.
- BrandoElFollito 3y agoWhen meeting new people I have a rule to "always be nice twice". This led me to great friends with whom we simply started on the wrong foot (this includes my best friend). People can have a bad day and you cannot always trust the chemistry. Now, some people take this as a sign of weakness, and always look surprised when on the third time I tear their throat out.