12 ms·
The oversimplification and promises that if you just buy their thing you'll have a distraction free life in 14 days really irks me. I struggled with this stuff
by masto 3y ago
The oversimplification and promises that if you just buy their thing you'll have a distraction free life in 14 days really irks me.
I struggled with this stuff for over 40 years. Only last year, after a disastrous crash, did I start learning about ADHD, which finally gave me the language and tools and access to support that I needed to start making a meaningful difference.
Without the understanding that diagnosis gave me, I'd tried every productivity technique and app, and came up with my own ad hoc systems, but they didn't stick and just reinforced the cycle of seeing myself as someone who's just doomed to live the life of a chronic procrastinator, always stressed out and overwhelmed.
A course like this would have done nothing but separate me from some money and give me a temporary feeling that I found the magic answer to everything, leading to disappointment and self hatred when I inevitably dropped it all.
I only have a personal anecdote, but if it sounds familiar, maybe there's some advice buried in it.
- LeafItAlone 3y agoWith your diagnoses, what are you now doing that is helping you?
- dartos 3y agoIt may be a little weird, but the from us music from brain.fm really helps me. I’ve measured the work I get done over sprints where I listen to brain.fm and where I don’t, and I usually get 2-3 more cards done of weeks that I do. Not a scientific measurement, but it is what it is.
- criddell 3y agoI'm intrigued, but brain.fm requires a credit card for a free trial. Bummer. Edit: I just checked my email and (in the spam folder) was an email from them with a link that works for 3 days. I'm trying it now.
- dartos 3y agoFWIW I’ve been using brainfm for about 8 years. Granted, I got my account with a lifetime subscription back when they were just spinning up, but I’ve used them pretty consistently since then.
- pc86 3y agoNot to excuse these dark patterns from shitty products that can't get revenue without tricking people, but privacy.com lets you set up single-use credit cards with e.g. a $1 lifetime limit. This is my go-to for places like this if I really, really want to try it.
- mp05 3y agoit's worth it, good product
- matteason 3y agoYou might enjoy the binaural beats and ambient radio on https://ambiph.one https://ambiph.one as a free alternative (disclosure: it's my site). Not as science-y as brain.fm but it helps me a lot with focus
- deleted 3y ago[deleted]
- dingnuts 3y agoI have ADHD (professionally diagnosed as an adult) and basically cannot focus without music. I complained at work about endpoint management software that was interfering with my music player and was told I didn't need to listen to music while working. I WFH so I just found another way to play music, but it was tempting to point out to my boss (who I otherwise quite like) that he had just told me that I shouldn't be using a reasonable accommodation for my disability that costs the company nothing, lol.
- hirvi74 3y ago> he had just told me that I shouldn't be using a reasonable accommodation for my disability that costs the company nothing To suffer from ADHD is to suffer alone. The world does not care for us and does not care about us. The world would rather attempt to hammer us screws in than try and use a drill.
- prometheus76 3y agoIt's the classic situation of someone without ADHD telling us "just focus!" or "you just need to write things down!" or "you're just lazy". I have ADHD, and I also do not have a sense of smell (lost it in a TBI when I was a teenager). I tell people, "you take for granted what it's like to have a sense of smell. It affects every moment of your day, catching your interest and directing your attention all the time. Imagine not having a sense of smell. Imagine not smelling dinner or smelling your wife or smelling your baby. Imagine not smelling flowers or not smelling a gas leak. So much of what you take for granted comes from your sense of smell. Having ADHD is like that. You take executive function for granted, and can't imagine what it's like to not have that. When you say 'just write things down!' it's like saying 'just smell harder!'"
- darkwater 3y agoI'm not a medical expert or anything but I guess there is a good chunk of population who just procrastinates or can struggle with focus without having ADHD? Or is there always a 1:1 relationship?
- pjc50 3y agoADHD, like a lot of things relating to the brain, is not a binary condition; it's just the diagnosis that's binary.
- dartos 3y agoIt’s likely that a lot more people have ADHD than we think, but I don’t think everyone who procrastinates does so bc of ADHD
- adadadadadad 3y agoIf you read the diagnostic criteria that is used, it’s so broad it could easily apply to most of the world’s population…as long as they declare they have trouble focusing.
- 3y ago
- slingnow 3y agoThis isn't at all what they claim. Can you point out where they say that "if you just buy their thing you'll have a distraction free life in 14 days" ? What it actually claims is to get you to "bearable levels of procrastination", which I find refreshing, since it seems like a very achievable and realistic goal for those of us that procrastinate. In fact, this claim is nearly the opposite of what you're railing against. You also said you have personally started making a meaningful difference, but gave zero hint about what you have done, and what impact it has made. And you leave us with "maybe there's some advice buried in it". I'd like to say, no, there's none I can see, unless you'd like to offer something specific and helpful. I'm curious to see what you have done.
- hiatus 3y ago> Can you point out where they say that "if you just buy their thing you'll have a distraction free life in 14 days" ? > From distraction to calm focus in 14 days
- nuancebydefault 3y agoIn fact my first reaction would tend to be the same as yours but then again, - If you read the whole article you see that it is in fact a pretext to a subscription. - There is in fact burried advice. The fact that reading articles like this is exciting and gives hope, but might turn out to be false hope in the end, especially if you have a severe form of ADHD. The advice is YMMV.
- charliebwrites 3y agoWhat language and tools did you learn that helped you finally be able to cope? This is something I also struggle with and as I get older it feels like I’m losing opportunities to do the things I want to do to ADHD
- bibliotekka 3y agoI too would appreciate some resourceful links.
- fragmede 3y agoDr. Russell Barkley is a good resource https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLKF2Eq0eYbbrNLoJjFpWG_ULGgKfW0muJ&si=18Ht2C4hGFmi_gJ_ https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLKF2Eq0eYbbrNLoJjFpWG_ULG... Jessica McCabe of How to ADHD is another one. https://youtu.be/sErtHttYOL4?si=ZZ2bGQ5HgbCIxSg8 https://youtu.be/sErtHttYOL4?si=ZZ2bGQ5HgbCIxSg8
- _yb2s 3y agoI could have written this... I've spent thousands on productivity and organization courses, and put a lot of effort into them, only to find myself unable to follow the system, for reasons I don't understand. My whole life I've suffered from massive guilt, shame, and stress over not getting things done that were really important to me, and nobody understanding. "Clearly it's not important to you, or you would just do it." I was actually diagnosed with ADHD 12 years ago, and the first medication and dose I tried didn't work, so I stopped, and basically forgot I even had ADHD. In part, I think I internalized the shame and dismissals from other people and still believed I was just "lazy" and "bad" and needed to try harder even despite having a clinical diagnosis. It didn't help that my (now ex) wife also was totally dismissive of the idea that I had ADHD, as were most of my friends and family. Even from other people I know with ADHD, they would get angry or dismissive when I mentioned my diagnosis, saying I can't possibly have ADHD because I have been successful so far in my career. I just recently decided to start looking into it again, now that my son has also been diagnosed. If I can learn how to help myself, maybe it will help me help him. I recently heard a podcast interview with Jessica McCabe, and she said something that was mind blowing to me: that there is no one solution or cure for ADHD, and we need to stop looking for that. You will need a large toolbox of things to help, and will need to keep adapting and changing this, and it still won't ever be a "cure." If anyone has any good info or resources to learn more about ADHD, please post them.
- adadadadadad 3y agoHow does exercise affect a child with ADHD? I always see these portrayals of ADHD children being hyperactive and just think: what if you just made them run outside for a while...surely they can't have never-ending energy and eventually tired themselves out. And after this period of exertion, when they rest, do they then just instantly revert back to 100% hyperactivity?
- _yb2s 3y agoThe physical hyperactivity is often a pretty minor symptom of ADHD, bigger issues for many kids are things like inability to regulate emotions, e.g. causing violent outbursts over small things, or inability to focus, e.g. not able to do school work. The physical hyperactivity, like other ADHD symptoms, is a lack of executive control- the person cannot choose to stop moving even though they want to, or feel they should. This is the part that is often hard for non-ADHD people to understand: lack of executive control is an inability to direct our own activity with will or intention. We know what we should do and want to do, but cannot make it happen. So we can, e.g. be really tired, and really want to stop moving, but be unable to do so. Sometimes, with enough will and focus, we can for a short time, but it takes 100x the effort it would take someone else, and can't be sustained for long. As a person with ADHD, and a father of a kid with ADHD, I can tell you that what you are asking isn't true, at least in our case. It's not about having never-ending energy, but about not being able to limit movement. My kid is constantly moving, even when extremely tired. They will fall out of chairs, and even thrash hard in the bed while trying to fall asleep. We are active outdoors people, and hiking all day long with a heavy load even makes zero difference. In fact, being tired seems to make the executive control worse, and therefore the hyperactivity worse. Which can be a downward spiral, because then you get increasingly tired, and are unable to physically relax, causing even more tiredness. For my kid, peak hyperactivity for the day is often the moments before falling asleep! That said- lesser amounts of exercise that are enough to be calming, but not tiring, are often very helpful. A short walk, etc. can really help.
- dovelome 3y agoSorry to heard that. I also have adhd and I’ve looking for solutions since I was 11 years old, now I am 29 years old and pretty much tested all the vitamins, exams, medication, therapy and bunch of other things. Today I found how to manage my adhd, the basic stuff, eat well, exercise and sleep well. It seems so simple but we need to find a synergy between all the basic, vitamins we sometimes have to take, CBT and so on. The doctor Le Grand on YouTube helped to discover a lot of alternative treatments and it worked, so well that I think I am using the super power of adhd and not longer controlled by a incessant mental energy.
- patrick451 3y agoIt really irks me how every post on HN about productivity gets derailed by some solipsistic person with ADHD. All resources aren't for all people.