3 ms·

A man goes to a doctor. “Doctor, I’m depressed,” the man says; life is harsh, unforgiving, cruel". The doctor lights up. The treatment, after all, is simple. “T

A man goes to a doctor. “Doctor, I’m depressed,” the man says; life is harsh, unforgiving, cruel". The doctor lights up. The treatment, after all, is simple. “The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight,” the doctor says, “Go and see him! That should sort you out. Next!” The next guy comes in. “Doctor, I have no joy in my life. I'm thinking of ending things,” he says. The doctor tells him: “The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight,” the doctor says, “Go and see him! That should sort you out. Next!” Another guy comes in. “Doctor, please help me. I'm on my wit's end. Everything is meaningless since I lost my wife a year ago. I can't get off the bed in the morning. I wish I was dead myself". The doctor doesn't miss a beat: “The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight,” the doctor says, “Go and see him! That should sort you out. Next!” And so on. It's now 7pm and the doctor's office has closed its doors. The doctor picks up the phone and dials a number: "Hello, is Pagliacci there? I'm doctor Greenwald. Tell him the tally is 38 people today. I expect my usual 10% cut".

ukuina 3y ago
A neat twist on the typical ending, wherein the patient sobs: "But doctor, I *am* Pagliacci!"
zoky 3y ago
https://twitter.com/spacetwinks/status/965428890830344193 https://twitter.com/spacetwinks/status/965428890830344193
ronald_raygun 3y ago
“A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?” The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?” And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on.”

ukuina 3y ago

A neat twist on the typical ending, wherein the patient sobs: "But doctor, I *am* Pagliacci!"

zoky 3y ago

https://twitter.com/spacetwinks/status/965428890830344193 https://twitter.com/spacetwinks/status/965428890830344193

ronald_raygun 3y ago

“A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?” The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?” And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on.”