5 ms·

"I went home, told my wife that I would be deeply ignoring her and our baby for the week, and spent twelve hours a day in the headset for four straight days."

"I went home, told my wife that I would be deeply ignoring her and our baby for the week, and spent twelve hours a day in the headset for four straight days." Father of the year right here.

bla3 3y ago
Is there another way?
- Astraco 3y ago
  Yes, a lot of them.
- Fnoord 3y ago
  Of course there is. As a parent (no matter your gender) you have the legal responsibility to take care of your children until adult age. On the double for young children, such as a baby. This is priority #1 in your life. I was just ill half of January (some seasonal cold/flu/whatever) and even then this is priority over resting. A baby needs attention, food, drink, clean diapers, sleep, hugs/massage (vs tummy cramps), safety (parent available). Furthermore, you and your significant other are a team of caregivers. You need to act like a team player ie. communicate and propose. Yes, you can have leisure time (tho not much with a newborn in my experience, it already gets better with a baby) but it is about giving and taking, balance between family, work, and fun. For example, he could use the device one hour a day. It would've just been a longer project, or less extensive. Anyway, I just brush it off as tough boy talk. He did communicate and work it out with his significant other and she agreed. Not in the sense he said I am unavailable for a week good luck with your life see you in a week.
  - wernercd 3y ago
    "priority #1" and as part of his priority? making money to pay the bills. While wife takes care of the kid. People around the world and throughout history sacrifice for their kids... we should all be so lucky. He's able to sacrifice from the comfort of home... some sacrifice in coal mines or on oil rigs or on long commutes to long days in factories. Complaining that dad has to work to provide is a first world problem.
    - Fnoord 3y ago
      I don't see his time with this headset as work but as fun/play. I guess we disagree on that.
      - sokoloff 3y ago
        This is how he makes his income, is it not? I really enjoy programming and find it fun/engaging. It’s still work, because it’s how I earn money. Other people work as tour guides or travel writers. Do you see what they do as playing around traveling or as work?
        Fnoord 3y ago
        I'm not sure he makes his income with writing reviews like this? Sure, you could make your hobby a job. But if they experiment with a device like this to see if it enhances their work it is kinda like the 80/20 rule at Google. It could turn out productive, inspiring. But I wouldn't want to bet on it. It wouldn't be the main task of his job.
        sokoloff 3y ago
        Even the 20 part of Google work is work, IMO, whether it turns out to be productive/inspiring/useful.
      - wernercd 3y ago
        I work as a computer programmer. I sit behind a desk and I have fun solving problems... while getting paid to use technology. You may not see it as work... but the guy is literally getting paid for it. No offense but it doesn't matter what you see or what you think you see - what matters is what's really happening. And what's really happening is this guy has gotten REALLY lucky: He's got a job where he can have "fun/play" doing something that pays his bills. That doesn't make his "sacrifice" anything less because it's enjoyable (sacrificing time with wife/kid(s)). It makes his sacrifice enjoyable but he still has to make the same sacrifice that parents around the world make on the daily. I guess I'd ask you honestly... do you see professional streamers or gaming streamers as working? Destiny, Vaush, Asmond Gold, pewdiepie, etc? I know streamers that spend 12 hours a day online engaging in content to make money - and a few of them have kid(s). They are having fun and making money while working their asses off to better their lives and, presumably, their families lives. They aren't slaving in a coal mine or sitting with dead looks in their eyes in a cubicle but they are making money and ends meet. Just because they are lucky (and work their asses off) doesn't mean they aren't also sacrificing. But I digress. I'm lucky enough to love what I do as well so I think the fact this guy can provide for his family by playing with toy is fucking awesome.
  - techdmn 3y ago
    I agree with everything you said. It's played for laughs, but it's a misogynistic joke about men having all the power and women having all the responsibility for child rearing. We can do better.
  - walteweiss 3y ago
    I just love how downvoted you are! Really shows the true hn crowd, the kids themselves.
    - CatWChainsaw 3y ago
      Kids that probably have an over-representation of Y chromosomes and swollen egos, so it tracks.
renewiltord 3y ago
That's his day job. No different from a truck driver doing overtime away from his wife and child to feed the family.
- justinator 3y ago
  Dude ain’t driving a big rig, he’s playing with a toy. One’s a need to make ends meet; ones just indulging in a luxury good for other’s distracted entertainment.
  - aetherson 3y ago
    If you get paid for playing with a toy, and you do not get paid for other things, then that puts rather a different face on it.
  - hackeraccount 3y ago
    That's like saying a guy in the NBA plays a game. I mean it's true one one level but on another level the guy just has a job.
awwstn 3y ago
based on everything tim has written that shows extreme self-awareness about his working/productivity style, and the fact that he makes a lot of money for his family by doing occasional multi-day binges of work, i think it's fair to give him the benefit of the doubt that they have a system that allows him to show up for his family much of the time while also maintaining his output of work
- justinator 3y ago
  Three cheers for being a functional workaholic. May we all aspire to such selfishness.
  - wernercd 3y ago
    Some people have to make sacrifices for their families - making money takes time? effort? sacrifice? ZOMG! HOW DARE HE! Selfishness? sacrificing for family - both on the fathers side to provide but also on the mothers side to take care of the fort? That's not selfishness. That's called being a good father. husband. wife. mother.
    - blamestross 3y ago
      The problem is that it isn't him making the sacrifice, it's his family.
      - DrSiemer 3y ago
        Tim does not seem like the kind of person who would do something like that without the full support of his family. I know people who spend most of the year away from their family and who are not bad parents. Sometimes sacrifices must be made to make things grow and invest in the future. Don't be so easy to judge.
      - pavel_lishin 3y ago
        We have absolutely no idea what their family dynamic is. We're armchair quarterbacking a whole marriage.
jmull 3y ago
Doing his job to provide for his family. How terrible.
grfhtsdfvv 3y ago
I thought it was pretty funny.
lostemptations5 3y ago
Haha so where is your Vision Pro review on the front page of HN? :))
- idlewords 3y ago
  And where is my baby? WHERE IS MY BABY?
Tagbert 3y ago
He basically took a one week business trip but instead of flying to a conference, he’s on a virtual trip. If he had actually flown somewhere would you consider him to be an irresponsible father?
- tweetle_beetle 3y ago
  I'd wager most parents would do their best to avoid a week away from home for work if it meant their partner looking after their baby solo.
  - gklitz 3y ago
    Why? I’m a father and I’ve had such periods of Looking after the baby solo while mom was on a 1week vacation. Why is that such a huge issue to you? I’m guessing you don’t have children and you have all sorts of incorrect ideas about how incredibly hard it must be, but it’s just a week with a bit less non-baby focused time. It’s not like it’s incredibly difficult or anything.
  - Nevermark 3y ago
    In a good family dynamic, everyone goes with the flow of what needs to be done. The kids too. In times of great distress I can imagine a parent being away temporarily being considered a hardship. Otherwise, it’s good for kids to spend time with different configurations of parent. And grandparents or extended family if they are lucky.
  - Tagbert 3y ago
    Also, in this case he wasn’t actually gone all the time. He was still there during the time he wasn’t using the AVP.
  - nilkn 3y ago
    Doing their best to avoid it does not mean always avoiding it. People travel for work all the time, and many of them have kids.

"I went home, told my wife that I would be deeply ignoring her and our baby for the week, and spent twelve hours a day in the headset for four straight days." Father of the year right here.

bla3 3y ago

Is there another way?

Astraco 3y ago
Yes, a lot of them.
Fnoord 3y ago
Of course there is. As a parent (no matter your gender) you have the legal responsibility to take care of your children until adult age. On the double for young children, such as a baby. This is priority #1 in your life. I was just ill half of January (some seasonal cold/flu/whatever) and even then this is priority over resting. A baby needs attention, food, drink, clean diapers, sleep, hugs/massage (vs tummy cramps), safety (parent available). Furthermore, you and your significant other are a team of caregivers. You need to act like a team player ie. communicate and propose. Yes, you can have leisure time (tho not much with a newborn in my experience, it already gets better with a baby) but it is about giving and taking, balance between family, work, and fun. For example, he could use the device one hour a day. It would've just been a longer project, or less extensive. Anyway, I just brush it off as tough boy talk. He did communicate and work it out with his significant other and she agreed. Not in the sense he said I am unavailable for a week good luck with your life see you in a week.
- wernercd 3y ago
  "priority #1" and as part of his priority? making money to pay the bills. While wife takes care of the kid. People around the world and throughout history sacrifice for their kids... we should all be so lucky. He's able to sacrifice from the comfort of home... some sacrifice in coal mines or on oil rigs or on long commutes to long days in factories. Complaining that dad has to work to provide is a first world problem.
  - Fnoord 3y ago
    I don't see his time with this headset as work but as fun/play. I guess we disagree on that.
    - sokoloff 3y ago
      This is how he makes his income, is it not? I really enjoy programming and find it fun/engaging. It’s still work, because it’s how I earn money. Other people work as tour guides or travel writers. Do you see what they do as playing around traveling or as work?
      - Fnoord 3y ago
        I'm not sure he makes his income with writing reviews like this? Sure, you could make your hobby a job. But if they experiment with a device like this to see if it enhances their work it is kinda like the 80/20 rule at Google. It could turn out productive, inspiring. But I wouldn't want to bet on it. It wouldn't be the main task of his job.
        sokoloff 3y ago
        Even the 20 part of Google work is work, IMO, whether it turns out to be productive/inspiring/useful.
    - wernercd 3y ago
      I work as a computer programmer. I sit behind a desk and I have fun solving problems... while getting paid to use technology. You may not see it as work... but the guy is literally getting paid for it. No offense but it doesn't matter what you see or what you think you see - what matters is what's really happening. And what's really happening is this guy has gotten REALLY lucky: He's got a job where he can have "fun/play" doing something that pays his bills. That doesn't make his "sacrifice" anything less because it's enjoyable (sacrificing time with wife/kid(s)). It makes his sacrifice enjoyable but he still has to make the same sacrifice that parents around the world make on the daily. I guess I'd ask you honestly... do you see professional streamers or gaming streamers as working? Destiny, Vaush, Asmond Gold, pewdiepie, etc? I know streamers that spend 12 hours a day online engaging in content to make money - and a few of them have kid(s). They are having fun and making money while working their asses off to better their lives and, presumably, their families lives. They aren't slaving in a coal mine or sitting with dead looks in their eyes in a cubicle but they are making money and ends meet. Just because they are lucky (and work their asses off) doesn't mean they aren't also sacrificing. But I digress. I'm lucky enough to love what I do as well so I think the fact this guy can provide for his family by playing with toy is fucking awesome.
- techdmn 3y ago
  I agree with everything you said. It's played for laughs, but it's a misogynistic joke about men having all the power and women having all the responsibility for child rearing. We can do better.
- walteweiss 3y ago
  I just love how downvoted you are! Really shows the true hn crowd, the kids themselves.
  - CatWChainsaw 3y ago
    Kids that probably have an over-representation of Y chromosomes and swollen egos, so it tracks.

renewiltord 3y ago

That's his day job. No different from a truck driver doing overtime away from his wife and child to feed the family.

justinator 3y ago
Dude ain’t driving a big rig, he’s playing with a toy. One’s a need to make ends meet; ones just indulging in a luxury good for other’s distracted entertainment.
- aetherson 3y ago
  If you get paid for playing with a toy, and you do not get paid for other things, then that puts rather a different face on it.
- hackeraccount 3y ago
  That's like saying a guy in the NBA plays a game. I mean it's true one one level but on another level the guy just has a job.

awwstn 3y ago

based on everything tim has written that shows extreme self-awareness about his working/productivity style, and the fact that he makes a lot of money for his family by doing occasional multi-day binges of work, i think it's fair to give him the benefit of the doubt that they have a system that allows him to show up for his family much of the time while also maintaining his output of work

justinator 3y ago
Three cheers for being a functional workaholic. May we all aspire to such selfishness.
- wernercd 3y ago
  Some people have to make sacrifices for their families - making money takes time? effort? sacrifice? ZOMG! HOW DARE HE! Selfishness? sacrificing for family - both on the fathers side to provide but also on the mothers side to take care of the fort? That's not selfishness. That's called being a good father. husband. wife. mother.
  - blamestross 3y ago
    The problem is that it isn't him making the sacrifice, it's his family.
    - DrSiemer 3y ago
      Tim does not seem like the kind of person who would do something like that without the full support of his family. I know people who spend most of the year away from their family and who are not bad parents. Sometimes sacrifices must be made to make things grow and invest in the future. Don't be so easy to judge.
    - pavel_lishin 3y ago
      We have absolutely no idea what their family dynamic is. We're armchair quarterbacking a whole marriage.

jmull 3y ago

Doing his job to provide for his family. How terrible.

grfhtsdfvv 3y ago

I thought it was pretty funny.

lostemptations5 3y ago

Haha so where is your Vision Pro review on the front page of HN? :))

idlewords 3y ago
And where is my baby? WHERE IS MY BABY?

Tagbert 3y ago

He basically took a one week business trip but instead of flying to a conference, he’s on a virtual trip. If he had actually flown somewhere would you consider him to be an irresponsible father?

tweetle_beetle 3y ago
I'd wager most parents would do their best to avoid a week away from home for work if it meant their partner looking after their baby solo.
- gklitz 3y ago
  Why? I’m a father and I’ve had such periods of Looking after the baby solo while mom was on a 1week vacation. Why is that such a huge issue to you? I’m guessing you don’t have children and you have all sorts of incorrect ideas about how incredibly hard it must be, but it’s just a week with a bit less non-baby focused time. It’s not like it’s incredibly difficult or anything.
- Nevermark 3y ago
  In a good family dynamic, everyone goes with the flow of what needs to be done. The kids too. In times of great distress I can imagine a parent being away temporarily being considered a hardship. Otherwise, it’s good for kids to spend time with different configurations of parent. And grandparents or extended family if they are lucky.
- Tagbert 3y ago
  Also, in this case he wasn’t actually gone all the time. He was still there during the time he wasn’t using the AVP.
- nilkn 3y ago
  Doing their best to avoid it does not mean always avoiding it. People travel for work all the time, and many of them have kids.