4 ms·

Yeah my first psychiatrist (who prescribed me citalopram vs depression/anxiety and methylphenidate vs symptoms of AD(H)D but only gave me GAD diagnosis) must've

by Fnoord 3y ago

Yeah my first psychiatrist (who prescribed me citalopram vs depression/anxiety and methylphenidate vs symptoms of AD(H)D but only gave me GAD diagnosis) must've thought along that line. Cause he told me [paraphrasing] he could give me a lot more diagnoses which wouldn't help me. Well, I'd love to have known earlier in my life. Because all my pros and cons, my personality can be deducted to the root being ASD. Meanwhile, my cousin had asperger diagnosis and my mother told me that describes me as well. ASD runs in my family, in both sides. Anyway, I firmly disagree. Self acceptance knowing you are wired differently and understanding aspects like Theory of Mind are a great opportunity to better function. The earlier the person learns to deal with these fundamentals (with which they likely WILL face issues with including in early childhood), the better. Case in point: my 5 y.o. daughter just does not read her little brother's social cues. She cannot fathom he does not want X or Y.

tthhrroowwaawwa 3y ago
What if anything do you do in practice to help in those situations where she doesn't read his social cues?
- Fnoord 3y ago
  Very good question. I explain her needs and desires do not necessarily align with his and that she must try to notice his (I describe them like do you hear he is yelling because of XYZ). This is largely futile. Because she notices he yells but doesn't understand why. He's only 3, so he mostly plays parallel (normal for his age). I also describe the circumstances of the situation. Usually it is before dinnertime. So I explain right before dinner isn't a good time to play together. Because they trigger each other. So it is a good time to play solo and respect each other's boundaries. At that time they're hangry and difficult, so often some drama isn't avoidable. Unfortunately some triggers cannot be avoided. They have to go bath sometimes, and we settled for once a week. He hates to wash his hair. Our daughter had same, as did I.
wegfawefgawefg 3y ago
shes five. i doubt most five year olds really understand social queues. your adult understanding is distilled in cultural expectation, and years of behavioural correction. That she is not an expert socializer at five years old does not indicate shes autistic. There are tens of thousands of confounding variables.
- Fnoord 3y ago
  It is one of the many flags/signs/signals/factors (whatever you want to call it) which we are familiar with. There are many more. Yes, some of her peers also have a couple of these, but I haven't met a peer yet (primary peers being elementary school and mom's friends) who has all these as clear as she does. Though I'd say I leave it up these parents (if (eventually) required).

by Fnoord 3y ago

tthhrroowwaawwa 3y ago

What if anything do you do in practice to help in those situations where she doesn't read his social cues?

Fnoord 3y ago
Very good question. I explain her needs and desires do not necessarily align with his and that she must try to notice his (I describe them like do you hear he is yelling because of XYZ). This is largely futile. Because she notices he yells but doesn't understand why. He's only 3, so he mostly plays parallel (normal for his age). I also describe the circumstances of the situation. Usually it is before dinnertime. So I explain right before dinner isn't a good time to play together. Because they trigger each other. So it is a good time to play solo and respect each other's boundaries. At that time they're hangry and difficult, so often some drama isn't avoidable. Unfortunately some triggers cannot be avoided. They have to go bath sometimes, and we settled for once a week. He hates to wash his hair. Our daughter had same, as did I.

wegfawefgawefg 3y ago

shes five. i doubt most five year olds really understand social queues. your adult understanding is distilled in cultural expectation, and years of behavioural correction. That she is not an expert socializer at five years old does not indicate shes autistic. There are tens of thousands of confounding variables.

Fnoord 3y ago
It is one of the many flags/signs/signals/factors (whatever you want to call it) which we are familiar with. There are many more. Yes, some of her peers also have a couple of these, but I haven't met a peer yet (primary peers being elementary school and mom's friends) who has all these as clear as she does. Though I'd say I leave it up these parents (if (eventually) required).