4 ms·

What Makes a Narcissist?

5 points by dnetesn 3y ago

PaulHoule 3y ago
Kohut would say Narcissism is a state of arrested development: if you believe that then the question, particularly if you want narcissists to get better, is what makes somebody not be a narcissist. (e.g. my evil twin doesn't want you to see https://mastodon.social/@UP8/111687412198643478 https://mastodon.social/@UP8/111687412198643478)
rini17 3y ago
Narcissism as a disorder is rare and it's only the extreme cases. As a personality style it is not that uncommon. Such milder narcissism is most problematic in close personal relationships, otherwise the person is fully functional. Since it's personality it's hard to change and it does not make sense to pathologize it. It still deserves recognition because in these relationships with narcissists there are victims with lasting psychological issues. I can't recommend enough Dr. Ramani Durvasula, she publishes lots of material to explain the topic in depth and with her experience as psychologist.
- Pamar 3y ago
  I found this (from Dr. Duvarsula) with a bit of googling: https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/narcissism https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/nar...
- PaulHoule 3y ago
  If you were asking about "why do people behave the way they do in 2024?" I think narcissism would be a central concept. Freud thought almost everyone but the psychotic had an Oedipus complex but Kohut convinced many psychoanalysts that a lot of people haven't developed enough to have one. 200 years ago when you grew up in some village and you did not had to discover who you are and find your place in the world I think narcissistic problems were not so widespread. When you could, say, go to grad school and know you are a lot smarter than the people at your undergrad school and probably most of the other grad students but you have heroes who seem to be a lot smarter than you and where the odds of surviving in the field look terribly long (APS said 2% when I got my PhD) and when there are a few people whose parents were professors and just seem to have a lot of "cheat codes", you either have problem in the N-sector or you have no mind. Also narcissists have an outsized influenced because they seem to have the right personality organization to succeed in our culture. Look for instance at the hold that Donald Trump has on a lot of people.

5 points by dnetesn 3y ago

Kohut would say Narcissism is a state of arrested development: if you believe that then the question, particularly if you want narcissists to get better, is what makes somebody not be a narcissist. (e.g. my evil twin doesn't want you to see https://mastodon.social/@UP8/111687412198643478 https://mastodon.social/@UP8/111687412198643478)

rini17 3y ago

Narcissism as a disorder is rare and it's only the extreme cases. As a personality style it is not that uncommon. Such milder narcissism is most problematic in close personal relationships, otherwise the person is fully functional. Since it's personality it's hard to change and it does not make sense to pathologize it. It still deserves recognition because in these relationships with narcissists there are victims with lasting psychological issues. I can't recommend enough Dr. Ramani Durvasula, she publishes lots of material to explain the topic in depth and with her experience as psychologist.

Pamar 3y ago
I found this (from Dr. Duvarsula) with a bit of googling: https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/narcissism https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/nar...
PaulHoule 3y ago
If you were asking about "why do people behave the way they do in 2024?" I think narcissism would be a central concept. Freud thought almost everyone but the psychotic had an Oedipus complex but Kohut convinced many psychoanalysts that a lot of people haven't developed enough to have one. 200 years ago when you grew up in some village and you did not had to discover who you are and find your place in the world I think narcissistic problems were not so widespread. When you could, say, go to grad school and know you are a lot smarter than the people at your undergrad school and probably most of the other grad students but you have heroes who seem to be a lot smarter than you and where the odds of surviving in the field look terribly long (APS said 2% when I got my PhD) and when there are a few people whose parents were professors and just seem to have a lot of "cheat codes", you either have problem in the N-sector or you have no mind. Also narcissists have an outsized influenced because they seem to have the right personality organization to succeed in our culture. Look for instance at the hold that Donald Trump has on a lot of people.