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The few Dutch folks I know are indeed kind of rude. One time I (Brazilian) went out to get some drinks with some Dutch friends and, omg, they spent the whole ni

The few Dutch folks I know are indeed kind of rude. One time I (Brazilian) went out to get some drinks with some Dutch friends and, omg, they spent the whole night trashing other people. I am accostumed to do it in a much more delicate way, while they didn't hold it back for a second.

StreetChief 3y ago
Your singular experience may not be representative of all Dutch...
- rafaelero 3y ago
  Yeah, maybe. I guess what stood out the most was not exactly the trashing part (which we all do some way or another), but how they didn't feel the need to soften the words. Since I was the only one who seemed a bit shocked by that, I thought that was perhaps cultural.
mpol 3y ago
That is considered rude in the Netherlands as well. But yes, many people do it. And you know that if you are out of sight, they will talk that way about you. It's a certain way of lashing out or letting go in an emotional way, some way to survive the complexity of life. It is correct to call it ugly. It can even be correct to talk to people about what they are doing. Ofcourse, if people are old and set in their ways, there is no helping. But young people can still be educated. There is some idea that you need to be "strong" (whatever that is) or "fit in", which is just wrong to me. If you don't, people judge you and talk bad about you. I know lots of people who do it about many people, even their closest friends.
richliss 3y ago
Dutch directness, and as a consequence rudeness, is legendary. They'd be world champions at it. Add in a fair amount of arrogance and you've got a reasonable chance of being on the end of what most would describe as them being rude. Here's an example, Two middle aged British couples go to a bar in Amsterdam, and quietly sit at a table in the corner having a few drinks. The bar then becomes a Karaoke bar filled with student aged locals who are very raucous, spilling drinks etc. At the end of the night, one of the men from one of the couples goes to the bar and gives the barman a tip equal to about 20% of that tables spend. The barman then proceeds to tell the man "I dislike British women". The Dutch barman thought that was acceptable and that there would be no recourse. If that were said in many parts of the UK there's a chance the barman would have a pint glass thrown at his head for saying such a rude and out of nowhere thing. As a Brit who has been to many, many European countries, I can say there's only really two countries that are really different and that's France and The Netherlands. Neither of their general population really feels any obligation to be courteous or polite to foreigners. The locals from every other European country I've been to have been polite/not rude as a bare minimum.

StreetChief 3y ago

Your singular experience may not be representative of all Dutch...

rafaelero 3y ago
Yeah, maybe. I guess what stood out the most was not exactly the trashing part (which we all do some way or another), but how they didn't feel the need to soften the words. Since I was the only one who seemed a bit shocked by that, I thought that was perhaps cultural.

mpol 3y ago

That is considered rude in the Netherlands as well. But yes, many people do it. And you know that if you are out of sight, they will talk that way about you. It's a certain way of lashing out or letting go in an emotional way, some way to survive the complexity of life. It is correct to call it ugly. It can even be correct to talk to people about what they are doing. Ofcourse, if people are old and set in their ways, there is no helping. But young people can still be educated. There is some idea that you need to be "strong" (whatever that is) or "fit in", which is just wrong to me. If you don't, people judge you and talk bad about you. I know lots of people who do it about many people, even their closest friends.

richliss 3y ago

Dutch directness, and as a consequence rudeness, is legendary. They'd be world champions at it. Add in a fair amount of arrogance and you've got a reasonable chance of being on the end of what most would describe as them being rude. Here's an example, Two middle aged British couples go to a bar in Amsterdam, and quietly sit at a table in the corner having a few drinks. The bar then becomes a Karaoke bar filled with student aged locals who are very raucous, spilling drinks etc. At the end of the night, one of the men from one of the couples goes to the bar and gives the barman a tip equal to about 20% of that tables spend. The barman then proceeds to tell the man "I dislike British women". The Dutch barman thought that was acceptable and that there would be no recourse. If that were said in many parts of the UK there's a chance the barman would have a pint glass thrown at his head for saying such a rude and out of nowhere thing. As a Brit who has been to many, many European countries, I can say there's only really two countries that are really different and that's France and The Netherlands. Neither of their general population really feels any obligation to be courteous or polite to foreigners. The locals from every other European country I've been to have been polite/not rude as a bare minimum.