I kind of love these cancellation scripts. I recently cancelled my cable because I switched to Fios. The 15 minute script took me through: 1) "I can't believ

I kind of love these cancellation scripts. I recently cancelled my cable because I switched to Fios. The 15 minute script took me through: 1) "I can't believe you're paying that much. You should have called us sooner for a discount." (Blaming the victim? Classy.) 2) "According to our database, you can't get Fios at your address." "I have it. I'm using it right now." "That can't be correct, our database doesn't show it." (Is this the same database that can't tell me what the monthly taxes are going to be when I sign up? It might be time for a different database vendor.) 3) "You really don't want to switch to fiber. Cable has a higher signal strength because it's electrical instead of optical." (I... guess that's true. 0 coulombs of charge pass through the fiber optic cable each second, which is much lower than any other technology!) There was also something in there about how I don't really want symmetric Internet because asymmetric is better. That one I actually argued with; I have no argument for their database being out of date but them trusting it, or the signal strength thing... but uploading fast is actually important to me. I mentioned that I write software for a living and he didn't press me that much on it, which was nice. This article reminds me that I need to write to the FTC. This is all flat-out lying, which should be illegal. Obviously, you aren't going to scam someone that's worked at 2 fiber ISPs, but someone less technical probably believes their arguments. In the end, the 15 minute call was probably the most entertainment I've had in years. Very rarely do people confidently lie to my face, so it was a fun experience. However, if the FTC wants to put everyone in prison for this, I say that's a great idea.