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| You sound like you saw the phrase "Right Way Guy", felt it sounded pejorative I'm not sure what it sounded like, but I'm pretty sure I didn't feel that way.

by Verdex 3y ago

| You sound like you saw the phrase "Right Way Guy", felt it sounded pejorative I'm not sure what it sounded like, but I'm pretty sure I didn't feel that way. | decided it must mean That Type Of Guy I Don't Like. ... huh. That escalated kind of quickly. | I have no idea how the Primer anecdote relates to anything at all. Well, I had hoped the paragraph following the anecdote explained that, but I guess I can't win them all can I. EDIT: What I find super interesting is that my original comment was that there are some interesting success and failure modes associated with "Right Way Guy". And I follow it up with a musing that social pressure to conform is a way for the social hivemind to protect adherents via statistics. THEN one of the comments looks suspiciously like it's chiding my social disharmonious actions. Very cool.

wcarss 3y ago
From your original comment, I learned some new things about a movie I enjoyed but haven't thought about in a while. I felt it connected fine to the topic, and made for a really interesting contribution to the discussion. I've always been intrigued by how the representation of those characters instantly connected so well with my engineer-identifying brain, and little details like that must have been a big part of it. It's a neat little nuance on the idea that what bits of cargo cult a person exhibits _now_ can sometimes give insight to their current place in life, and perhaps even to their deeper character and heart.
juped 3y ago
I'm sorry I replied; I thought you were confusedly misinterpreting the article by reading something about cargo-cult practices into it, but I now think you're just sort of emitting nonsense, and so it turned out to have been pointless. edit: Actually, on reflection, >THEN one of the comments looks suspiciously like it's chiding my social disharmonious actions. I consider this extremely aggressive, rude, and to bear no relation whatsoever to anything I typed. I don't understand what causes people to talk in bad faith like that.
- cole-k 3y ago
  > I don't understand what causes people to talk in bad faith like that. Okay I guess I'll take the bait and assume you are legitimately confused and that your original comment was in good faith. When you say something like > You sound like you saw the phrase "Right Way Guy", felt it sounded pejorative (it's more gently poking fun at a common thing), and decided it must mean That Type Of Guy I Don't Like. you might think that no one should get offended by this because you are being objective about your thoughts. But it doesn't matter that you're "just" sharing your thoughts. These thoughts are hurtful to the parent as evidenced by their reactions. They're hurtful because people don't like being wrong nor do they like being told that they're upset. If this isn't clear to you, then you have my deepest condolences because I expect you often unintentionally offend others. If I may offer unsolicited advice, you can avoid this kinds of unpleasant reactions by mincing your words. I know a few people who speak like you did and they all are so confused when I tell them this because they think readers would be offended that they are padding their message with unnecessary formality and fluff. But without it, their message is often curt. I see this interaction play out all the time on HN (including my response), so I hope my response is not in vain...
  - juped 3y ago
    No, I meant that part to be a little mean, and I wouldn't be upset if the other poster had taken offense at that; it's a tradeoff. I'm offended that they emitted actual word salad at me followed by a random (and actually wildly offensive! or it would be if it made any sense) accusation that was unrelated to anything even close to anything I said. That's what I mean by "bad faith".
  - wcarss 3y ago
    I really respect the effort you've made here to communicate with some empathy and to try to be a help.

by Verdex 3y ago

wcarss 3y ago

From your original comment, I learned some new things about a movie I enjoyed but haven't thought about in a while. I felt it connected fine to the topic, and made for a really interesting contribution to the discussion. I've always been intrigued by how the representation of those characters instantly connected so well with my engineer-identifying brain, and little details like that must have been a big part of it. It's a neat little nuance on the idea that what bits of cargo cult a person exhibits _now_ can sometimes give insight to their current place in life, and perhaps even to their deeper character and heart.

juped 3y ago

I'm sorry I replied; I thought you were confusedly misinterpreting the article by reading something about cargo-cult practices into it, but I now think you're just sort of emitting nonsense, and so it turned out to have been pointless. edit: Actually, on reflection, >THEN one of the comments looks suspiciously like it's chiding my social disharmonious actions. I consider this extremely aggressive, rude, and to bear no relation whatsoever to anything I typed. I don't understand what causes people to talk in bad faith like that.

cole-k 3y ago
> I don't understand what causes people to talk in bad faith like that. Okay I guess I'll take the bait and assume you are legitimately confused and that your original comment was in good faith. When you say something like > You sound like you saw the phrase "Right Way Guy", felt it sounded pejorative (it's more gently poking fun at a common thing), and decided it must mean That Type Of Guy I Don't Like. you might think that no one should get offended by this because you are being objective about your thoughts. But it doesn't matter that you're "just" sharing your thoughts. These thoughts are hurtful to the parent as evidenced by their reactions. They're hurtful because people don't like being wrong nor do they like being told that they're upset. If this isn't clear to you, then you have my deepest condolences because I expect you often unintentionally offend others. If I may offer unsolicited advice, you can avoid this kinds of unpleasant reactions by mincing your words. I know a few people who speak like you did and they all are so confused when I tell them this because they think readers would be offended that they are padding their message with unnecessary formality and fluff. But without it, their message is often curt. I see this interaction play out all the time on HN (including my response), so I hope my response is not in vain...
- juped 3y ago
  No, I meant that part to be a little mean, and I wouldn't be upset if the other poster had taken offense at that; it's a tradeoff. I'm offended that they emitted actual word salad at me followed by a random (and actually wildly offensive! or it would be if it made any sense) accusation that was unrelated to anything even close to anything I said. That's what I mean by "bad faith".
- wcarss 3y ago
  I really respect the effort you've made here to communicate with some empathy and to try to be a help.