Losing hurts, but: 1. Instead of thinking, "sheesh, I suck" after losing, start thinking, "well played" (even if your opponent was in a losing position and bea

Losing hurts, but: 1. Instead of thinking, "sheesh, I suck" after losing, start thinking, "well played" (even if your opponent was in a losing position and beat you on time or with a sneaky pre-move; they still won). This simple reframing makes it less about the gaps in your abilities and more about having found an opponent who outplayed you that game. Finding better opponents is a good thing; you will learn more. 2. Actively make loss about growth: review games you lost. Find (a) the losing move and (b) the reason you made that move (harder, but important). Use that info to change your thought process to reduce future mistakes. This can be as simple as, "it's 2am and I've been playing blitz for 3 hours, I'm too tired to play my best, I'll stop playing after midnight". Or "I keep missing mate threats. I will say "checks, captures, threats" in my head after my opponent makes a move to train myself to systematically seek dangerous intent, until that process is so internalised that it's natural. I will also solve mate-in-one[1] or mate-in-two[2] puzzles on Lichess for 10 minutes a day until they feel obvious." 3. If you lose three games in a row, stop playing for a while (a few minutes/hours/days, whatever you need). If losses hugely affect your mood, a long string of them can make you feel really low. Pre-emptively break that cycle and do something else for a while. [1] https://lichess.org/training/mateIn1 https://lichess.org/training/mateIn1 [2] https://lichess.org/training/mateIn2 https://lichess.org/training/mateIn2