This reminds me of the 80's "Tough Love" movement. It destroyed my family. I ran away at 14 and didn't talk to them even once for 20 years because of how that b

This reminds me of the 80's "Tough Love" movement. It destroyed my family. I ran away at 14 and didn't talk to them even once for 20 years because of how that book got them to treat us. To this day we still pretty much never speak with each other. Only pleasantries at Christmas and the occasionally remembered birthday, and that's about it. None of us can see it any other way. My sister has a similar thing with them, but less so. But they abuse the heck out of that relationship, since she ends up being the default blame and fixer for everything. She and I have a hard time communicating. It's awkward, and likely because of the shame our parents brought on us during their cultish following of that stupid self-help book when we were preteens and teens. There are a lot of snake oil answers to your every problem out there. Unfortunately there is no snake oil that can fix problems caused by the previous so-called remedies. The parents managed to brainwash themselves into resigning to the stereotypical "If we knew then what we know now," yet not once considering a path to repair anything they did while following that program. It changed everyone it ever touched, and made us all apathetic and even ambivalent to anything that might possibly reconnect us. The majority of self-help programs are led by charlatans who read a book and figured they could come up with a better plan, to be written in yet another stupid self-help book. Word to the wise: self help books are not self help. They're a hand-held scapegoat to accepting your own perceived failures, and sometimes a huge amplifier that turns them into real failures.