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Good advice. One thing I'd add is that having a kid is very different than I imagined. I assumed it would be a slog like doing chores, but you'd feel accompli

Good advice. One thing I'd add is that having a kid is very different than I imagined. I assumed it would be a slog like doing chores, but you'd feel accomplished at the end (like having a clean house). Instead, it's way more fun than I imagined, more similar to playing a funs port. It's very enjoyable, but breaks and rest time are welcome. I'm not sure I agree on the "reach out 3 times and then stop reaching out". I have some friends who are terrible at social situations. They don't reach out to anyone. They're homebodies, and lonely, and often find excuses. Gently asking once every few weeks if they want to get together seems to be what they need. Sometimes it takes 3 tries on average, on occasion more, sometimes less.

jvanderbot 3y ago
Yeah, I was surprised how "easy" it was to change my life around the new kiddos. I wanted to. It was hard to not spend time with them. I spoil my kids though. Maybe we were corrupted by incorrect images of kids/parents.
ilamont 3y ago
> One thing I'd add is that having a kid is very different than I imagined. I assumed it would be a slog like doing chores, but you'd feel accomplished at the end (like having a clean house). One of the unexpected benefits of being the WFH parent for so long is I became an excellent cook, starting from practically no ability at all. Cooking real, varied dinners that keep kids happy 2x-3x per week will level up your skills in a way that weekend attempts a few times per month just can't compete. I remember the first time I did something really new that worked out well - a self-serve burrito bar featuring various ingredients. The kids were thrilled and my spouse was so grateful. It changed the family dynamics for the better.