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> Men 75 and older had the highest suicide rate last year at nearly 44 per 100,000 people 75 is a viable die-able age. This is my end of life plan if i am disa

> Men 75 and older had the highest suicide rate last year at nearly 44 per 100,000 people 75 is a viable die-able age. This is my end of life plan if i am disabled, diseased or just not having fun in life. I don't get why only men are making this decision though.

Podgajski 3y ago
“ just not having fun in life.” That statement is incredible to me. Can you explain what not having fun would look like to you?
- jorts 3y ago
  Chronic pain is the first thing that comes to mind for me.
  - Podgajski 3y ago
    I am in chronic pain, chronic mental pain. Should I kill myself?
    - jorts 3y ago
      I hope not. I recommend you seek help.
- nervousvarun 3y ago
  Chronic pain, immobility, severe mental disabilities (senility) etc. Is it really that hard to imagine a scenario where life isn't fun for someone at an advanced age?
  - Podgajski 3y ago
    I can imagine what it’s like Not being fun, I can’t imagine what it’s like to kill myself just because I’m not having fun.
- unshavedyak 3y ago
  Oh man, so many things at very old age. Difficulty moving, leading to an ever increasing cascading series of health problems. Big debilitating diseases like dementia or alzheimers. Anything that can cause being bed-ridden the new permanent normal. And lets not forget the final stage, the potential 1-3 months (like my grandma) of life. She had finally had enough of the pain and difficulty, but she had to just let the disease take her over rather than end her life right then. So she spent 6 weeks in agony with a nurse 24/7 solely to manage pain. Yea.. i don't get the appeal, personally.
somedude895 3y ago
[flagged]
- apwell23 3y ago
  > It’s a sad existence when having fun is the only thing that keeps you going. As opposed to what?
  - somedude895 3y ago
    Purpose. I suggest Viktor Frankl‘s book Man‘s Search for Meaning to anyone too hopelessly deep in contemporary nihilism. In addition, Marcus Aurelius' Meditations and Seneca's letters provide further opportunity for changing one's perspective in the matter if he so wishes.
    - hotpotamus 3y ago
      Read Frankl - I actually thought it was an important historical account of the holocaust, and for some reason it stuck with me more than "Night" by Wiesel, but I really only ended up feeling worse because I never did find a "why" that he touted so highly as to get through any "how".
  - Whoppertime 3y ago
    [flagged]
- HPsquared 3y ago
  Probably a euphemism.
DeIlliad 3y ago
Men are lonely, isolated, and lack the social support that women do. Not uncommon to hear someone say "if it wasn't for ..... I would just disappear." Men lack that "...." especially later in life when parents have passed away.
- falloutx 3y ago
  I don't think women above 75 have a good social support too. We as society just don't take good care of the elderly.
  - zingababba 3y ago
    Depends on the person too, my 90 year old grandmother still lives alone in her large house and is so in touch with her neighbors that she has someone that mows her grass, someone that brings her mail up to her doorstep, someone that does her weeding, someone that does her shopping, and on and on. I'm always amazed by how many people just volunteer to do stuff for her, it's like a superpower. She is a pretty unique individual though, I think most elderly individuals just slip into a pit of isolation.
  - DeIlliad 3y ago
    I can only give you anecdotes but all of my grandmothers and great aunts have friends and frequently go out with them. I'm not trying to argue with you about the pitiful state of elder care in the US though. I agree fully.
unshavedyak 3y ago
Same. Though i dislike that i feel i'll be forced to make someone else deal with my body. Ie i'd much rather go to a location (or have them come to me) and they can put me down, deal with the body, etc. I don't want to have to take pills or w/e and make some poor medic see that (not that they're not used to it..). I see so many old people go far, far beyond what constitutes capable or even coherent. That just seems like a nightmare to me. All for the sake of.. what, some religious foundation that is dying out?
acover 3y ago
In Canada under medical assistance in dying, there isn't a huge gender difference. > In 2021, slightly more than half (52.4%) of those receiving MAID were men, and the small percentage difference between men and women has not changed significantly since 2020. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/230213/dq230213c-eng.htm# https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/230213/dq230... So in the situation you are describing it may not be a difference in desire but in the effectiveness of the method used. Or that men over 75 commit suicide for other reasons than medical problems.
mwbajor 3y ago
"I don't get why only men are making this decision though." Oh come on, we all know why. Its socially acceptable to hate men and blame them for everything bad. It starts or feeds negative emotions.
giantg2 3y ago
"I don't get why only men are making this decision though." I think it's how society treats them. I would think most other cultures have lower rates based on how men are viewed and treated in other societies. At least in my view, men are expected to be strong, successful, etc. They are seen as providers (look at how courts treat them). So when you aren't working, aren't strong anymore, etc, some people aren't going to see their worth in other areas. In general men are expected to be self supporting (look at charities and welfare) and to support others (alimony, child support, main provider for family), so what do you expect when they've been groomed this way and can't take care of themselves and become a burden to others?
barrysteve 3y ago
Men of that age group are seeing their beloved 'old world' crumble and be replaced around them. I am one of the tail end of the old world types and I speculate that it adds up after a while. It's odd going around town and seeing every landmark changed, all the mediums (film, newspapers and more) you loved be relegated to niche outlets. All the people that knew your world and spoke your cultural language are gone. Memories stacked on memories e.g. this street address used to be a shopping mall, that used to be where my high school sweetheart first kissed me. Add medical difficulty on top of that, family troubles and financial woes. Men used to run the world and they were finely tuned for it. You'd have to write a biography or book to get all that backed up change out of you. Millenials are going to feel this very acutely, I speculate.
- HPsquared 3y ago
  Millennials will always be able to play the old videogames, watch the old films and shows, etc. Much more of our experience is media-focused.

Podgajski 3y ago

“ just not having fun in life.” That statement is incredible to me. Can you explain what not having fun would look like to you?

jorts 3y ago
Chronic pain is the first thing that comes to mind for me.
- Podgajski 3y ago
  I am in chronic pain, chronic mental pain. Should I kill myself?
  - jorts 3y ago
    I hope not. I recommend you seek help.
nervousvarun 3y ago
Chronic pain, immobility, severe mental disabilities (senility) etc. Is it really that hard to imagine a scenario where life isn't fun for someone at an advanced age?
- Podgajski 3y ago
  I can imagine what it’s like Not being fun, I can’t imagine what it’s like to kill myself just because I’m not having fun.
unshavedyak 3y ago
Oh man, so many things at very old age. Difficulty moving, leading to an ever increasing cascading series of health problems. Big debilitating diseases like dementia or alzheimers. Anything that can cause being bed-ridden the new permanent normal. And lets not forget the final stage, the potential 1-3 months (like my grandma) of life. She had finally had enough of the pain and difficulty, but she had to just let the disease take her over rather than end her life right then. So she spent 6 weeks in agony with a nurse 24/7 solely to manage pain. Yea.. i don't get the appeal, personally.

somedude895 3y ago

[flagged]

apwell23 3y ago
> It’s a sad existence when having fun is the only thing that keeps you going. As opposed to what?
- somedude895 3y ago
  Purpose. I suggest Viktor Frankl‘s book Man‘s Search for Meaning to anyone too hopelessly deep in contemporary nihilism. In addition, Marcus Aurelius' Meditations and Seneca's letters provide further opportunity for changing one's perspective in the matter if he so wishes.
  - hotpotamus 3y ago
    Read Frankl - I actually thought it was an important historical account of the holocaust, and for some reason it stuck with me more than "Night" by Wiesel, but I really only ended up feeling worse because I never did find a "why" that he touted so highly as to get through any "how".
- Whoppertime 3y ago
  [flagged]
HPsquared 3y ago
Probably a euphemism.

DeIlliad 3y ago

Men are lonely, isolated, and lack the social support that women do. Not uncommon to hear someone say "if it wasn't for ..... I would just disappear." Men lack that "...." especially later in life when parents have passed away.

falloutx 3y ago
I don't think women above 75 have a good social support too. We as society just don't take good care of the elderly.
- zingababba 3y ago
  Depends on the person too, my 90 year old grandmother still lives alone in her large house and is so in touch with her neighbors that she has someone that mows her grass, someone that brings her mail up to her doorstep, someone that does her weeding, someone that does her shopping, and on and on. I'm always amazed by how many people just volunteer to do stuff for her, it's like a superpower. She is a pretty unique individual though, I think most elderly individuals just slip into a pit of isolation.
- DeIlliad 3y ago
  I can only give you anecdotes but all of my grandmothers and great aunts have friends and frequently go out with them. I'm not trying to argue with you about the pitiful state of elder care in the US though. I agree fully.

unshavedyak 3y ago

Same. Though i dislike that i feel i'll be forced to make someone else deal with my body. Ie i'd much rather go to a location (or have them come to me) and they can put me down, deal with the body, etc. I don't want to have to take pills or w/e and make some poor medic see that (not that they're not used to it..). I see so many old people go far, far beyond what constitutes capable or even coherent. That just seems like a nightmare to me. All for the sake of.. what, some religious foundation that is dying out?

acover 3y ago

In Canada under medical assistance in dying, there isn't a huge gender difference. > In 2021, slightly more than half (52.4%) of those receiving MAID were men, and the small percentage difference between men and women has not changed significantly since 2020. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/230213/dq230213c-eng.htm# https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/230213/dq230... So in the situation you are describing it may not be a difference in desire but in the effectiveness of the method used. Or that men over 75 commit suicide for other reasons than medical problems.

mwbajor 3y ago

"I don't get why only men are making this decision though." Oh come on, we all know why. Its socially acceptable to hate men and blame them for everything bad. It starts or feeds negative emotions.

giantg2 3y ago

"I don't get why only men are making this decision though." I think it's how society treats them. I would think most other cultures have lower rates based on how men are viewed and treated in other societies. At least in my view, men are expected to be strong, successful, etc. They are seen as providers (look at how courts treat them). So when you aren't working, aren't strong anymore, etc, some people aren't going to see their worth in other areas. In general men are expected to be self supporting (look at charities and welfare) and to support others (alimony, child support, main provider for family), so what do you expect when they've been groomed this way and can't take care of themselves and become a burden to others?

barrysteve 3y ago

Men of that age group are seeing their beloved 'old world' crumble and be replaced around them. I am one of the tail end of the old world types and I speculate that it adds up after a while. It's odd going around town and seeing every landmark changed, all the mediums (film, newspapers and more) you loved be relegated to niche outlets. All the people that knew your world and spoke your cultural language are gone. Memories stacked on memories e.g. this street address used to be a shopping mall, that used to be where my high school sweetheart first kissed me. Add medical difficulty on top of that, family troubles and financial woes. Men used to run the world and they were finely tuned for it. You'd have to write a biography or book to get all that backed up change out of you. Millenials are going to feel this very acutely, I speculate.

HPsquared 3y ago
Millennials will always be able to play the old videogames, watch the old films and shows, etc. Much more of our experience is media-focused.