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Unless you absolutely force them, their interest is a huge factor in what they’ll learn. I started to read when I was 2 (presumably late 2), and my parents did

Unless you absolutely force them, their interest is a huge factor in what they’ll learn. I started to read when I was 2 (presumably late 2), and my parents did nothing special but read to me. I just wanted to read, I was really into it, and I was able to associate the letters with the sounds.

lelanthran 3y ago
> Unless you absolutely force them, their interest is a huge factor in what they’ll learn. Whether you like it or not, at some point you are going to absolutely force them to learn something. Whether that is by sending them to a school, or teaching them yourself. Most children would rather not spend time on a lesson if they could spend that time playing.
- Foobar8568 3y ago
  Incorrect, it depends of the value you pass down to your kids.
  - lelanthran 3y ago
    > Incorrect, it depends of the value you pass down to your kids. At some point, they will be unwilling to listen to you, so you have to enforce something or else you won't be passing down any values to them. Kids don't magically know what is best for them. What we do is we force a routine until it becomes routine and then you don't have to force it anymore. Brushing teeth? Some nights/mornings the kid will simply say no. Wearing clothes? Sometimes your toddler will simply say no. Eating veggies? Sometimes your kid will simply say no. Whatever you do to get them to change their mind (cajoling, threatening, bribing) is, exactly, forcing your will on the child. There is no such thing as raising a child without having to enforce some rules.
- viraptor 3y ago
  Kind of true, but also, what is a game and what is a lesson/chore is a very fuzzy line. My 2yo spent a long time picking up tree clippings and putting them into the bin, because it was fun and he could wear oversized gloves. Was it work/learning, yes. Was it play, also yes. The trend of gamification is trying to maximise that effect in many scenarios.
  - lelanthran 3y ago
    We try to make everything a game ("Let's see who can remain quietest the longest"), but even the slowest child sooner or later tires of a particular game. This is why I say make it a routine, not a game, because then it's a given, not a negotiation. So, sure, you can make it a game to brush teeth each night, but then you have problems the night that the kid want's to play a different game with the toothbrush. Making it a routine avoids that problem altogether.
- Auracle 3y ago
  True. I just question doing it (too much) at such an early age, if only because every time they play when they're 2 years old they're also probably learning as well. Just last night my daughter was putting Hotwheels down a ramp in different ways, trying to do 2 at once, etc.
  - lelanthran 3y ago
    Sure, but I'm not advocating for "too much". My toddler has a routine - everyday we have a lesson at a particular point in time. No exceptions. But ... I use my discretion. The minute he gets bored, or fidgety, or stops paying attention during the lesson (assuming that he wasn't so before the lesson), I end the lesson. I also change up the lesson plan if he seems (prior to even starting the lesson) irritable or in the wrong mood - "Today we are going to draw a picture of a car/toy/garden/etc". This means that some days our lesson is 5m, some days it goes on for 40m (reare, but it happens), some days we learn to read something, some days we simply stroll in the garden examining bugs and the different colors they come in, some days we learn to write new words. It's not a game[1] to him, it's a lesson, and it's not the lesson that's important, it's the routine. My intention is not primarily to teach him, it's to normalise the concept of homework before he reaches the point that he gets given any. And, yeah, the routine is initially forced. Just like brushing teeth. Or bedtime. Or eating vegetables. After a week or too, there's no longer any actual bribing, cajoling, pleading or threatening going on to make him come to the lesson room. Now, it just happens. Without the initial enforcement, things like lessons, brushing of teeth, baths, etc just wouldn't happen, so even the most progressive minded parent is still going to have to enforce stuff on the kid, whether they like to think of themselves as a non-forceful parent or not. [1] Games are negotiable, games are optional, games are always fun, games are played at any time. Don't make the mistake of letting the child think of the lessons as a game; it makes it difficult to enforce the routine later. Instead, make the lesson fun, while making sure that the child does not confuse it with "game". And yes, this is my second child. Calling lessons/learning a game really was an eye-opener for me with the first child.

lelanthran 3y ago

> Unless you absolutely force them, their interest is a huge factor in what they’ll learn. Whether you like it or not, at some point you are going to absolutely force them to learn something. Whether that is by sending them to a school, or teaching them yourself. Most children would rather not spend time on a lesson if they could spend that time playing.

Foobar8568 3y ago
Incorrect, it depends of the value you pass down to your kids.
- lelanthran 3y ago
  > Incorrect, it depends of the value you pass down to your kids. At some point, they will be unwilling to listen to you, so you have to enforce something or else you won't be passing down any values to them. Kids don't magically know what is best for them. What we do is we force a routine until it becomes routine and then you don't have to force it anymore. Brushing teeth? Some nights/mornings the kid will simply say no. Wearing clothes? Sometimes your toddler will simply say no. Eating veggies? Sometimes your kid will simply say no. Whatever you do to get them to change their mind (cajoling, threatening, bribing) is, exactly, forcing your will on the child. There is no such thing as raising a child without having to enforce some rules.
viraptor 3y ago
Kind of true, but also, what is a game and what is a lesson/chore is a very fuzzy line. My 2yo spent a long time picking up tree clippings and putting them into the bin, because it was fun and he could wear oversized gloves. Was it work/learning, yes. Was it play, also yes. The trend of gamification is trying to maximise that effect in many scenarios.
- lelanthran 3y ago
  We try to make everything a game ("Let's see who can remain quietest the longest"), but even the slowest child sooner or later tires of a particular game. This is why I say make it a routine, not a game, because then it's a given, not a negotiation. So, sure, you can make it a game to brush teeth each night, but then you have problems the night that the kid want's to play a different game with the toothbrush. Making it a routine avoids that problem altogether.
Auracle 3y ago
True. I just question doing it (too much) at such an early age, if only because every time they play when they're 2 years old they're also probably learning as well. Just last night my daughter was putting Hotwheels down a ramp in different ways, trying to do 2 at once, etc.
- lelanthran 3y ago
  Sure, but I'm not advocating for "too much". My toddler has a routine - everyday we have a lesson at a particular point in time. No exceptions. But ... I use my discretion. The minute he gets bored, or fidgety, or stops paying attention during the lesson (assuming that he wasn't so before the lesson), I end the lesson. I also change up the lesson plan if he seems (prior to even starting the lesson) irritable or in the wrong mood - "Today we are going to draw a picture of a car/toy/garden/etc". This means that some days our lesson is 5m, some days it goes on for 40m (reare, but it happens), some days we learn to read something, some days we simply stroll in the garden examining bugs and the different colors they come in, some days we learn to write new words. It's not a game[1] to him, it's a lesson, and it's not the lesson that's important, it's the routine. My intention is not primarily to teach him, it's to normalise the concept of homework before he reaches the point that he gets given any. And, yeah, the routine is initially forced. Just like brushing teeth. Or bedtime. Or eating vegetables. After a week or too, there's no longer any actual bribing, cajoling, pleading or threatening going on to make him come to the lesson room. Now, it just happens. Without the initial enforcement, things like lessons, brushing of teeth, baths, etc just wouldn't happen, so even the most progressive minded parent is still going to have to enforce stuff on the kid, whether they like to think of themselves as a non-forceful parent or not. [1] Games are negotiable, games are optional, games are always fun, games are played at any time. Don't make the mistake of letting the child think of the lessons as a game; it makes it difficult to enforce the routine later. Instead, make the lesson fun, while making sure that the child does not confuse it with "game". And yes, this is my second child. Calling lessons/learning a game really was an eye-opener for me with the first child.