7 ms·

We decry "demands" when we should acknowledge "dependencies;" kids won't properly compile without their needs met.

by rexpop 3y ago

lifeisstillgood 3y ago
Fantastic analogy :-)
pixl97 3y ago
The question here is one of alignment. I child may think "I need to eat right now" but that doesn't necessarily mean the "right now" part is correct. Open world problems are difficult to define, even the word 'properly' you use has a vast amount of interpretability as to what you believe the 'proper' outcome should be.
- XorNot 3y ago
  There is absolutely no parent who's problem is a child who thinks "I need to eat right now".
  - argiopetech 3y ago
    Of course there are. That's one of the three states of infants (asleep, hungry, soiled). It's one of the major causes of upset and bad behavior in toddlers. It's obviously the case for children who don't get enough to eat due to deprivation. That doesn't mean my toddler wouldn't prefer ice cream over whatever is for dinner, though.
    - TeMPOraL 3y ago
      You're forgetting the fourth state: too hot/too cold. I only mention it because, as any parent knows, infants are effectively small finite state machines, and you can deal with their crying even half-awake, if you go through a mental checklist. But you'd better not miss a state to check :).
      - salamandersss 3y ago
        Or the fifth state, colic. It can last for months and the child will cry every waking hour. The binary flag is stuck 'on' which in my experience set every family member into a meltdown so you'll get no relief, because a baby that cries inconsolably for hours (months!) on end and can't be fixed is kryptonite to many people. So yeah, good fucking luck if that happens. You'll have to feed on a schedule, change regularly and check even more regularly, guess appropriate temperature etc because the baby will be screaming bloody murder if awake no matter what.
        drivebyhooting 3y ago
        [flagged]
        deleted 3y ago
        [deleted]
        salamandersss 3y ago
        [flagged]
    - XorNot 3y ago
      You're mistaking "hungry" for "wants to eat". My son during teething was hungry a lot. He was absolutely unwilling to eat for hours till we found whichever thing he was going to tolerate each time (since he's stopped teething for now he's gotten a lot better about it, but you still have to offer food since he doesn't always recognise he is getting hungry).
- rexpop 3y ago
  I don't know what your point is. That children can't articulate their needs? That we should consult adult peers and experts rather than taking children at their word? Of course we should. Children do not teach courses on child development. It goes without saying that children exaggerate, eg crying over spilt milk. To repudiate children's complaints seems cruelly unnecessary.
Feathercrown 3y ago
Compilation error: I don't feel like it
ilrwbwrkhv 3y ago
We have brainwashed our western minds to make women leave their kids in daycare sometimes weeks after being born. Then we are brainwashed to let kids sleep in a separate room so that mommy can get a good night's rest and be productive at work. We need a minimum of 3 years of maternity leave in our country to being with. It is insane as one of the best countries in the world we don't let people have kids naturally.
- HenryBemis 3y ago
  The movie "The Pod Generation" (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15768848/ https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15768848/) has a theme that touches what you state. No need to get pregnant, give birth, stay home with your kid. While in the pod the fetus can be trained, educated, etc...
- ClumsyPilot 3y ago
  > We need a minimum of 3 years of maternity leave in our country to being with And a year of mandatory evaluation and treatment at a psycologist for various baggage, complexes and plain stupidity that will manifest when raising a child.
  - touisteur 3y ago
    I don't know about mandatory, but well funded and expected in that period would go a long way. Child rearing, especially, will surface things you might have not known were there or were so painful. You might also need a variety of help, from talking therapy to cptsd/desensitising. To parents feeling overwhelmed and daily triggered suddenly, in the presence or thinking of your children, you're really not alone, and I strongly advise getting all the help you can, as soon as possible.
- rexpop 3y ago
  Families with "women in the workplace" are not brainwashed, they are wielding hard earned rights and freedoms against violently indifferent economic structures. Under capitalism, we are not free unless we draw a wage, and women have learned there are no wages for housework.
trashtester 3y ago
A 1-year old may not compile without having its needs met, but a 4-year-old may not link if it doesn't acknowledge the needs of its peers.

We decry "demands" when we should acknowledge "dependencies;" kids won't properly compile without their needs met.

by rexpop 3y ago

We decry "demands" when we should acknowledge "dependencies;" kids won't properly compile without their needs met.

lifeisstillgood 3y ago

Fantastic analogy :-)

pixl97 3y ago

The question here is one of alignment. I child may think "I need to eat right now" but that doesn't necessarily mean the "right now" part is correct. Open world problems are difficult to define, even the word 'properly' you use has a vast amount of interpretability as to what you believe the 'proper' outcome should be.

XorNot 3y ago
There is absolutely no parent who's problem is a child who thinks "I need to eat right now".
- argiopetech 3y ago
  Of course there are. That's one of the three states of infants (asleep, hungry, soiled). It's one of the major causes of upset and bad behavior in toddlers. It's obviously the case for children who don't get enough to eat due to deprivation. That doesn't mean my toddler wouldn't prefer ice cream over whatever is for dinner, though.
  - TeMPOraL 3y ago
    You're forgetting the fourth state: too hot/too cold. I only mention it because, as any parent knows, infants are effectively small finite state machines, and you can deal with their crying even half-awake, if you go through a mental checklist. But you'd better not miss a state to check :).
    - salamandersss 3y ago
      Or the fifth state, colic. It can last for months and the child will cry every waking hour. The binary flag is stuck 'on' which in my experience set every family member into a meltdown so you'll get no relief, because a baby that cries inconsolably for hours (months!) on end and can't be fixed is kryptonite to many people. So yeah, good fucking luck if that happens. You'll have to feed on a schedule, change regularly and check even more regularly, guess appropriate temperature etc because the baby will be screaming bloody murder if awake no matter what.
      - drivebyhooting 3y ago
        [flagged]
        deleted 3y ago
        [deleted]
        salamandersss 3y ago
        [flagged]
  - XorNot 3y ago
    You're mistaking "hungry" for "wants to eat". My son during teething was hungry a lot. He was absolutely unwilling to eat for hours till we found whichever thing he was going to tolerate each time (since he's stopped teething for now he's gotten a lot better about it, but you still have to offer food since he doesn't always recognise he is getting hungry).
rexpop 3y ago
I don't know what your point is. That children can't articulate their needs? That we should consult adult peers and experts rather than taking children at their word? Of course we should. Children do not teach courses on child development. It goes without saying that children exaggerate, eg crying over spilt milk. To repudiate children's complaints seems cruelly unnecessary.

Feathercrown 3y ago

Compilation error: I don't feel like it

ilrwbwrkhv 3y ago

We have brainwashed our western minds to make women leave their kids in daycare sometimes weeks after being born. Then we are brainwashed to let kids sleep in a separate room so that mommy can get a good night's rest and be productive at work. We need a minimum of 3 years of maternity leave in our country to being with. It is insane as one of the best countries in the world we don't let people have kids naturally.

HenryBemis 3y ago
The movie "The Pod Generation" (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15768848/ https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15768848/) has a theme that touches what you state. No need to get pregnant, give birth, stay home with your kid. While in the pod the fetus can be trained, educated, etc...
ClumsyPilot 3y ago
> We need a minimum of 3 years of maternity leave in our country to being with And a year of mandatory evaluation and treatment at a psycologist for various baggage, complexes and plain stupidity that will manifest when raising a child.
- touisteur 3y ago
  I don't know about mandatory, but well funded and expected in that period would go a long way. Child rearing, especially, will surface things you might have not known were there or were so painful. You might also need a variety of help, from talking therapy to cptsd/desensitising. To parents feeling overwhelmed and daily triggered suddenly, in the presence or thinking of your children, you're really not alone, and I strongly advise getting all the help you can, as soon as possible.
rexpop 3y ago
Families with "women in the workplace" are not brainwashed, they are wielding hard earned rights and freedoms against violently indifferent economic structures. Under capitalism, we are not free unless we draw a wage, and women have learned there are no wages for housework.

trashtester 3y ago

A 1-year old may not compile without having its needs met, but a 4-year-old may not link if it doesn't acknowledge the needs of its peers.