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> But you weren't trustworthy. Yup. I preface a statement about once a week by saying “there’s a difference between ‘I can’t say’ and ‘I don’t know.’ In this c
by mikehollinger 3y ago
> But you weren't trustworthy.
Yup. I preface a statement about once a week by saying “there’s a difference between ‘I can’t say’ and ‘I don’t know.’ In this case, …”
It’s been useful. It helps to communicate without breaking bonds of confidentiality or trust.
It also helps people from reading too much into an off the cuff “I dunno” which is literally true. I do not in fact have knowledge of what you’re asking about. Maybe I should or shouldn’t but I can tell you I don’t know.
- iamleppert 3y agoThis is hollow advice. Your job as an engineering manager is to maintain the integrity of the team and deliver business results. You can’t have it both ways. You can’t preach trust and transparency if your definition is selective. By definition those things require authenticity and completeness. Would you trust or accept as an answer someone who tells you “I can’t say” when asked a very direct question “Is my job safe? Should I start looking for another job?” Especially when you’ve been ordered (and let’s face it, executives give orders, not suggestions when it comes to this stuff). They expect your loyalty is to them and they also have trust in you that will be violated if you don’t follow their “guidance”. So what are your choices as an EM? No good ones, besides the obvious of don’t put yourself in that position if you like to think of yourself as a good person.
- PH95VuimJjqBqy 3y agoThere are always going to be people on the team for whom the manager will never be good enough. This does not mean most reasonable people run around with such a negative view of everything. Which, btw, is what I'm getting from your post. That you're one of those people.