> It’s about wanting a man with enough resources to waste on a diamond. well yes, but not really. it's about showing off. it's a status game. which is fine for

> It’s about wanting a man with enough resources to waste on a diamond. well yes, but not really. it's about showing off. it's a status game. which is fine for a certain degree. "we are social animals", etc. status is intertwined with a lot of very pragmatic interpersonal things (peer pressure of conformism, reciprocating gifts, respecting each other, not being late or too early, taking turns to speak and listen, remembering birthdays, remembering who remembers our birthdays) and community-wide trust (who can ask you a favor, loans, borrow your car, who do you work with). but there are much better signals for "who do you pick as a mate" than "how many carats does this diamond is?", of course arguably a lot of people are not really good at picking up on those interpersonal signals, so ... they recruit the community through these reflective signals.