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The diamond ring has no utility, so there’s no calculation to make. It’s an irrational proof of commitment.

eru 3y ago
Proof of commitment can have utility. And status symbols can have utility. (Going on a tangent: compare Bitcoin's proof-of-work, which also has utility. Of course, that doesn't mean diamonds nor proof-of-work are the best bang-for-buck. For the latter, you can use proof-of-stake or avoid cryptocurrencies altogether. For the former, there are plenty of other social arrangements that avoid diamond rings.)
- friend_and_foe 3y ago
  Yes, but giving something worthless but expensive is not a real tangible proof of commitment. "Here is something I paid too much for" is less meaningful than "here is something very valuable." Something valuable says if you are bad to her you'll lose out and she will have something to show for the commitment she reciprocated, something expensive that isn't valuable says I'll behave how you want to keep you around. In India they give gold jewelry, that makes a lot of sense. Their cultural reasoning about it is very different (it's a financial investment that ties families together) but the act is better IMO.
  - eru 3y ago
    Yes, gold (or gold jewelry) holds its resale value better than diamond rings.
- xp84 3y ago
  Just realized: A big fat diamond is a literal Proof of Work.
  - eru 3y ago
    Especially since it has so little resale value.
makeitdouble 3y ago
> It’s an irrational proof of commitment. I think that's a bridge too far. There's many clear reasons why people want a diamond, and even an angle like "I want to follow society's expectations" is to me far from being irrational when you're prepping yourself to build a whole life with someone else. A couple can discuss these matters and come up with alternative paths, people are referencing other materials and I'd include not buying anything fancy and save up for the first payment of their home for instance. But brides requesting a diamond is usually far from lacking rationale.
- Horffupolde 3y ago
  I agree. For reference, by irrational I mean that it goes against a utilitarian calculation as proposed by the linked article. I don’t mean that it’s “dumb” or lacking any reasoning.

eru 3y ago

Proof of commitment can have utility. And status symbols can have utility. (Going on a tangent: compare Bitcoin's proof-of-work, which also has utility. Of course, that doesn't mean diamonds nor proof-of-work are the best bang-for-buck. For the latter, you can use proof-of-stake or avoid cryptocurrencies altogether. For the former, there are plenty of other social arrangements that avoid diamond rings.)

friend_and_foe 3y ago
Yes, but giving something worthless but expensive is not a real tangible proof of commitment. "Here is something I paid too much for" is less meaningful than "here is something very valuable." Something valuable says if you are bad to her you'll lose out and she will have something to show for the commitment she reciprocated, something expensive that isn't valuable says I'll behave how you want to keep you around. In India they give gold jewelry, that makes a lot of sense. Their cultural reasoning about it is very different (it's a financial investment that ties families together) but the act is better IMO.
- eru 3y ago
  Yes, gold (or gold jewelry) holds its resale value better than diamond rings.
xp84 3y ago
Just realized: A big fat diamond is a literal Proof of Work.
- eru 3y ago
  Especially since it has so little resale value.

makeitdouble 3y ago

> It’s an irrational proof of commitment. I think that's a bridge too far. There's many clear reasons why people want a diamond, and even an angle like "I want to follow society's expectations" is to me far from being irrational when you're prepping yourself to build a whole life with someone else. A couple can discuss these matters and come up with alternative paths, people are referencing other materials and I'd include not buying anything fancy and save up for the first payment of their home for instance. But brides requesting a diamond is usually far from lacking rationale.

Horffupolde 3y ago
I agree. For reference, by irrational I mean that it goes against a utilitarian calculation as proposed by the linked article. I don’t mean that it’s “dumb” or lacking any reasoning.