I'm doing a lot better these days on Zoloft, and have been working through a lot of things with my wife, coaching each other through things. My previous mode wa

I'm doing a lot better these days on Zoloft, and have been working through a lot of things with my wife, coaching each other through things. My previous mode was to stuff everything down and ignore it, and I actively try to keep tabs on how I'm feeling to combat it. Most of these are waves caused by childhood events out of my control, and I was taken to therapy off and on throughout my childhood and teens. I got nothing from therapy each time because of that mindset in which I believed therapy wouldn't make my life different and until I can make my life different, there's no sense in processing my emotions or talking about how something makes me feel. I have also gained a strong Catholic faith through it all, which has been very good for my mental health. I only labeled myself a depressive because historically that's who I have been since about age 8. It has affected my positivity and made me complain a lot (a habit I have worked hard to kick), attracted me to cynical dark humor, and warped my sense of self a lot. I'm not opposed to therapy because I'm in a stable place in life and ready to do the work, but I have come a long way with my wife alone.